I slowly pulled my hand out of his and ran my fingers through his dark hair. He made a soft, childlike noise and my heart ached. After everything that had happened over the last few weeks, all I could think about was how much I loved him. I loved everything about him, and his wonderful family was just the cherry on top.
He shifted again as I softly ran my fingers through his hair.
He’d said he loved me.
I was having a hard time putting the pieces together, but I specifically remember him saying it. Then another memory came and I had to wake him. I shook his shoulder a little.
“Devin, please wake up.” I didn’t want to yell and have nurses come in.
He jumped up like there was a fire. He blinked rapidly and took in his surroundings. Suddenly, he dropped back into his seat and grabbed my hand. He kissed my hand before laying his face into my palm.
“I’m so glad you’re OK, baby. I don’t know what I would’ve done.” He continued to caress my hands with his face.
“Devin, where’s Jenny? Is she OK?”
He looked up at me and softly pushed a stray piece of hair behind my ear. A slow smile developed as he ran his finger down the side of my face.
“She’s OK, thanks to you. You saved her.”
“But the men—they didn’t?”
I couldn’t bring myself to say the word rape, but he knew what I was asking.
“No, they didn’t.” He put his head down and took a deep breath. “I should’ve been there, Lilly. I should’ve been there for you and her, but I wasn’t. This is my fault, all of it. I’m so sorry for everything I did to you. I want to make a clean start with you. There’s so much I wanna tell you when you get out of here, but right now all I want you to know is that I’m in love with you and I want to be with you, no matter what.”
He leaned over and kissed my forehead, then my nose, and then my lips—all very softly.
“I love you, too.” I reached up and palmed his cheek.
Someone cleared their throat in the doorway and Devin jumped back like we were teenagers getting caught. I looked up and my mom stared back at me. She looked worried, which was an expression I hadn’t seen on my mother much in my life. She left the doorway and came to my side.
“Are you feeling OK?” She asked as she scooped up my hand.
“I’m in some pain, but nothing I can’t handle.”
“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here, honey. You have no idea how worried I was. I just took a mini vacation to New York to see your Aunt Barbra and I guess I should’ve checked the weather because, believe it or not, I got stuck in a blizzard. No flights were leaving. I’m so sorry.”
She smoothed my hair back. It was strange and very motherly, and it caught me by surprise.
“It’s OK, Mom. I’m a big girl,” I smiled.
Then I was confused.
“How long have I been here? What’s today?” I asked.
Devin stepped up.
“You’ve been here for a little over a week. Today’s Monday. As long as you do well, you’ll get to go home soon. At least that’s what Doctor Ryan says.”
He seemed uneasy around my mother.
“When did you get here, Mom?” I asked.
“Just now,” she looked away as if she was ashamed.
No one had a chance to say anything else. There was a whistle at the door and soon I was bombarded by Dad and Jenny.
“Look who’s awake!” Dad said as he hugged me.
Then there was Jenny, who I thought was never going to let me go. I laughed and pulled her hair in a picking manner.
“I love you, Lil. I’ll never be able to thank you enough,” she said with tears in her eyes.
She looked older, as if the experience had made her wiser in the ways of the world.
I didn’t miss the strange eye contact between my mother and Devin.
I found out from Dad and Jenny later that night that Devin had only left the hospital to go to my apartment and take a shower. He wouldn’t even take a chance of going all the way to his house in Walterboro. Since my place was close to the hospital, he had begged Shannon to let him shower there.
Jenny and Dad had been bringing him clothes and apparently it had been three days since he had eaten anything. I had my mother bring everyone food and practically force-fed Devin a turkey sub. Dad and Jenny laughed.
I’d never felt so much love around me in all of my life. Without it seeming weird, Dad and Jenny already felt like family. I’d already been calling Dad, Dad, for the last month or more. As far as I was concerned they were my family.