Then I started crying, and not just dainty, pretty tears. Oh, no, these were gut-wrenching sobs with the most unattractive noises ever.
“Rach. Baby…” Landon pulled me into his arms, holding me against his chest as I sobbed.
“No,” I said, pushing back to stand on my own. “Don’t. Be. Nice. To me.” Oh, great, now I was hyperventilating, too. “I’m like…psycho over here, petrified that we’ll get home and you’ll leave me, and then you go and do this super-sweet thing. And it’s perfect!” I shouted, like he’d done something wrong.
“Oh God, Rach.” He reached for me, and I retreated until I was standing on the perfect deck that overlooked the perfect water in perfect Fiji that my perfect boyfriend had set up for us.
“I’m so sorry,” I cried, unable to stop. “It’s so nice, and just…everything, and here I am losing my shit because I’m so scared of losing you.”
“You’re not going to lose me,” he promised, grasping my upper arms. “We’re never going down that road again.”
“It’s just that all of this… I’ve tried so hard to block you out, to keep my walls up, but it’s like you Trojan horsed me, because you’ve always been there. I never stood a chance. I’ve hated you so much because it was the only thing to keep me from admitting how very much I loved you.” Holy shit, why couldn’t I stop crying? Every word was yelled, ungraceful and ugly, yet raw and so very real.
“Baby.” His eyes went soft and filled with so much joy, so much love, that I started crying even harder.
“Because I am so in love with you, and I want us to work, Landon. I need us to work, because we’re the only thing that makes sense to me.”
And that sounded like a seal barking. Great.
He laughed. “God, I love you.”
“And I love you!” I shouted. “Now, if I could just stop…crying!” I sucked in another stuttered breath that sounded something like a donkey braying. “Make it stop. Seriously!”
He kissed me, swinging me up into his arms. “I can make it stop.”
Then he jumped off the deck into the water, carrying me with him. I took a deep breath just before the Pacific washed over us in a surprising wave of warmth. His lips were on mine as we sank to the bottom of the shallow lagoon.
My legs slid from his arms to wrap around his hips, my breath held in that perfect moment where the world stopped and there was only us.
Once my lungs burned, we kicked for the surface.
I sputtered with my first breath. “Seriously?”
He grinned, more beautiful than I had ever seen him. “Hey, it stopped.”
I kicked back and splashed him, sending water all over his gorgeous face.
“You can’t be mad,” he said, swimming toward me.
“And why is that?” My sundress billowed around me, caught in the ebb and flow of the water.
“Because you love me.” He pulled me to him as he treaded water.
“I do,” I admitted, my voice steady and sure—like the storm had passed over me and all that remained was love and the freedom that came with it. “What are you going to do with it?”
“Everything,” he answered, then kissed me. He tasted like salt water and Landon, and I gave myself over to him, trusting him to keep me afloat. His arms held me tenderly, but his mouth was open, carnal, and a hot contrast to the water around us.
My arms around his neck, I returned his kiss with abandon, letting go of every worry and fear that had held me back. As if the waters had baptized us, I forgave him of every past transgression and gave us a clean slate—a place to start over fresh.
We kissed hungrily, our bodies moving with each other until I was ready to challenge any public indecency laws Fiji might have. I wanted him—needed him—more than I needed air, more than I needed my next heartbeat.
His hand moved to my ass, my dress long having abandoned any pretense of cover, and he played with the edge of my bikini bottoms. As his fingers swept under the fabric, he skimmed my center, close enough to bring the barely banked fire of my constant craving for him to life, but too far for me to do anything but rock back into his hands and whimper for more.
“I need you,” he said, his voice carrying a desperate edge.
“Then take me,” I ordered, our breathing harsh.
Balancing me on his front, he moved the short distance to the ladder and then urged me forward. I scrambled up the ladder, the heat of the deck dissipated by the puddle of water I stood in. I undid the buttons on the front of my dress and had it peeled off by the time Landon reached the top. His shirt quickly joined it in a wet heap on the dark wood.
My stomach clenched at the sight of his honed, lean body as he raked his hair out of his eyes, water sluicing down the carved lines of his abs. His skin was as colorful as the setting around us, his tattoos rippling and moving with his motions as he stalked me across the deck.
I was more than willing to be caught.
How was this man mine? How could someone so perfectly built, so intelligent, so reckless and incredibly sexy only want me?
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he said to me, as if he’d read my mind.
I braced myself against the railing of the deck, and then his mouth was on mine, his hands in my hair and his tongue in my mouth. He felt incredible against me, his stomach tensing as my fingers explored him, his breath slightly shaky as he left my lips in favor of my neck, licking and sucking the drops of salt water from my skin.