“You’ll never let her go, will you?” Dean asked.
Katie shook her head. “Not without a fight.”
“So why look for the mother at all?”
Katie met his eyes and blew out a breath. “Wouldn’t you? If someone left a child on your doorstep, wouldn’t you wonder who the parents were? Not to mention the legal reasons.”
“If someone left a child on my doorstep, darlin’, I’d know the baby was mine. Or at least have a quick paternity test to figure it out.”
Katie rolled her eyes again. “You know what I mean. If you were a woman and didn’t know…wouldn’t you question?”
He never considered the female position…didn’t think it was possible for a man. “Yeah. I’d wonder.”
“So I’m looking. I owe it to Savannah and me. I don’t know what drove her biological mother to give her away and I can’t rest until I do.”
Dean scooted closer to her on the couch and Savannah turned her head in his direction. Her tiny hand lifted up and Dean offered her a finger. She clasped it and gripped him hard. There was no stopping the smile on his lips.
“What if you don’t find her?”
“I’ll cross that road when I come to it. No reason to invite trouble. That’s what Aunt Bea always says. I get it now. Savannah and I will figure it out together. And when the day comes that she asks about her real mom, I’ll be able to tell her I tried to find her.”
Dean knew more than most how much Katie missed having her mother. He rested his head on Katie’s shoulder and stared down at the tiny blue-eyed bundle. Savannah still gripped his finger and something even deeper inside of him.
“What can I do to help?”
Beside him, Katie released a deep breath. “Just keep her existence quiet for a little longer. Once Patrick has exhausted his search for the mom, I’ll contact a lawyer and make damn sure I can keep her. Then I’ll tell my family.”
Dean couldn’t remember a time in his life when he heard Katie so convicted. There was no kidding around, no unsure tone in her voice. Something told him that, if anyone shoved, she’d take the baby with a wad of money and split.
Mothers protect their children and all that.
Now that Dean knew about Savannah, Katie found a much more comfortable pace in life. She gave up pretending to stay in the hotel altogether and moved most of her things into Monica’s small apartment.
“Are you sure it’s OK that we’re still here?” Katie asked Monica a few nights after Dean found out her secret.
Dressed in scrubs, Monica shrugged Katie’s concerns away. “When I was in nursing school, Jessie took care of everything for me. Yeah, I worked on the side to help, but the money I brought in didn’t amount to a whole lot. She never complained and, from what I could tell, never had a need to. You’re like a sister to me, Katie, and I wouldn’t want you to have to go through any of this alone. You and Savannah are welcome here for as long as you need to be.”
“It makes all the difference in the world to have someone who understands what’s going on.”
“How is Dean taking it?”
“Good, I guess.”
“You guess?”
“He’s anxious, I think. You know, like you and I were in the beginning. He asks if I’ve heard from Patrick every day.”
“Have you…heard from Patrick?”
Katie shook her head. “I’d have told you if he’d called. What if we never find the mother, Mo? What if we do find her and she wants Savannah back?”
“Stop! Seriously, Katie, you’re going to talk yourself crazy with the ‘what ifs.’ Savannah is nearly two months old and you’ve not heard one word from a biological mother wanting an update. Instead of vacillating between thoughts of What if you find the mother and What if she wants her back, you might want to think about how you’re going to tell Jack, Jessie, and your dad that you have a baby.”
Her skin itched to tell her family about Savannah. The dozens and dozens of pictures she’d taken of her sat in a memory card just waiting to be shared. “How I tell them anything will depend on what I find out about the mother.”
“And if you never find out about the mother?”
“Then I’ll just tell them all the truth. It’s not like I can keep it a secret forever.”
Monica gripped her hands together. “Why not tell them now? Seems Dean took the information well. My guess is your dad and brother might do the same.”
Katie laughed. “You don’t know my dad. He’s as subtle as a Saint Bernard in a china shop. He’d bulldoze his way into hospitals, into medical records…into people’s lives to get what he wants. If I told him about Savannah, we’d probably find the mother sooner, but I might lose everything in the process. The last thing I want is a media circus or a police investigation of any kind. Savannah is going to grow up knowing I wanted her from the beginning. If her biological mother had some kind of secret or need to keep Savannah away from her, the last thing I want to do is blow that up in the woman’s face. She left Savannah to me for a reason and I aim to find out what that reason is…quietly. My dad isn’t quiet!”
“What about Jack?”
“Jack would take it better. But he’d want the answers just as much as my dad.”
“If he found out, would he keep things quiet?”
Katie rubbed her hands over her face. “I think so. For a while. But the more people that know, the harder it becomes to keep the secret.”