It was like being struck by lightning. Hannah felt the current through her body, but it was her mind that
was most affected.
I know you! It was as if she had been standing in a dark landscape, lost and blind, when suddenly a
brilliant flash illuminated everything, allowing her to see farther than she'd ever seen before. She was
trembling violently, pitching forward even as he fell toward her. Electricity was running through every
nerve in her body and she was shaking and shaking, overcome by waves of the purest emotion she'd
ever felt.
Fury.
"You were supposed to be there!" She got out in a choked gasp. "Where were you?"
You were supposed to be with me-for so long! You're part of me, the part I've always vaguely missed.
You were supposed to be around, helping
out, picking me up when I fell down. Watching my back, listening to my stories. Understanding things
that I wouldn't want to tell other people. Loving me when I'm stupid. Giving me something to take care of
and be good to, the way the Goddess meant women to do.
Hannah-
It was the closest thing to a mental gasp Hannah could imagine, and with it she realized that somehow
they were directly connected now. He could hear her thoughts, just as she could hear his.
Good! she thought, not wasting time to marvel over this. Her mind was raging on.
You were my flying companion! My playmate! You were my other half of the mysteries! We were
supposed to be sacred to each other-and you haven't been there!
This last thought she sent squarely toward him. And she felt it hit him, and felt his reaction.
"I've tried!"
He was horrified... guilt-stricken. But then, Hannah could sense that this was pretty much the usual
state for him, so it didn't affect him quite as much as it might have someone else. And beneath the horror
was an astonishment and burgeoning joy that sent a different kind of tingle through her.
"You do know me, don't you?" he said quietly. He pushed her back to look at her, as if he still couldn't
believe it. "You remember... Hannah, how much do you remember?"
Hannah was looking at him, studying him.... Yes, I know that bone structure. And the eyes, especially
the eyes. It was like an adopted child discovering a brother or sister and seeing familiar features in an
unfamiliar face, tracing each one with wonder and recognition.
"I remember... that we were meant for each other. That we're"-she came up with the word slowly-'
'soulmates.''
"Yes," he whispered. Awe was softening his features, changing his eyes. The desperate sadness that
seemed so much a part of them was lightening. "Soulmates. We were destined for each other. We should
have been together down the ages."
They were supporting each other now, Hannah kneeling on the porch and Thierry holding her with one
knee on a step. Their faces were inches apart. Hannah found herself watching his mouth.
"So what happened?" she whispered.
In the same tone, without moving back, he whispered, "I screwed up."
"Oh."
Her initial fury had faded. She could feel him, feel his emotions, sense his thoughts. He was as anguished
at their separation as she was. He wanted her. He loved her... adored her. He thought of her the way
poets think of the moon and the stars-in ridiculous hyperbole. He actually saw her surrounded by a sort
of silvery halo.
Which was completely silly, but if he wanted to think of her that way-well, Hannah wouldn't object. It
made her want to be very gentle with him.
And right now she could feel his warm breath. If she leaned forward just an inch her top lip would touch
his bottom lip.
Hannah leaned forward.
"Wait-" he said.
That was a mistake, saying it out loud. It moved
his lips against hers, turning it from a touch into a kiss.
And then, for a while, neither of them could resist. They needed each other so desperately, and the kiss
was warm and sweet. Hannah was flooded with love and comfort and joy.
This was meant to be.
Hannah was dizzy but still capable of thought. I knew life had something wonderful and mysterious to
give me. Something I could sense but not see, something that was always just out of reach.
And here it is. I'm one of the lucky ones-I've found it.
Thierry wasn't as articulate. All she could hear him think was, Yes.
Hannah had never been so filled with gratitude. Love spilled from her and into Thierry and back again.
The more she gave, the more she got back. It was a cycle, taking them higher and higher.
Like flying, Hannah thought. She wasn't dizzy anymore. She was strangely dear and calm, as if she were
standing on a mountaintop. Infinite tenderness ... infinite belonging. It was so good it hurt.
And it made her want to give more.
She knew what she wanted. It was what she'd tried to give him the first time, when she knew he would
die without her. She'd wanted to give him what all women could give.
Life.
She was only a girl now, not ready for the responsibilities that would come with making new life from her
body. But she could give Thierry life another way.
She pulled back to look at him, to see bruised dark
eyes filled with aching tenderness. Then she touched his mouth with her fingertips.
He kissed them. Hannah ignored the kiss and poked a finger in.
Shock flared in Thierry's eyes.
There. That was it. The long canine tooth, just barely sharp. Not yet the tooth of a predator, of a fox or
a lynx or wolf. She ran her finger against it.
The shock turned to something else. A glazed look. Need mixed with pure terror.
Thierry whispered, "Don't-Hannah, please. You don't know-"
Hannah tested the tip of the tooth with her thumb. Yes, it was sharper now. Longer, more delicate. It
would look like the tooth of an arctic fox in her palm-milky-white, translucent, elegantly curved.
Thierry's chest was heaving. "Please stop. I-I can't-"
Hannah was enthralled. I don't know why people are afraid of vampires, she thought. A human could
tease or torture a vampire this way, driving him insane-if she were cruel.
Or she could choose to be kind.
Very gently, Hannah reached with her other hand. She touched the back of Thierry's neck, bringing just
the slightest pressure to bear. But he was so obedient to her touch-it was easy to guide his mouth to her
throat.
Hannah...
She could feel him trembling.
Don't be afraid, she told him silently. And she pulled him closer.
He grabbed her shoulders to push her away-and then just hung on. Clinging desperately, helplessly.
Kissing her neck over and over. She felt his control break... and then felt the sharpness of teeth.
It wasn't like pain. It was like the tenderness, a hurting that was good.
And then... devastating bliss.
Not a physical feeling. It was emotional. They were completely together, and light poured through them.
How many lives together have we missed? How many times have I had to say, Maybe in the next life?
How did we ever manage to come apart?
It was as if her question went searching through both their minds, soaring and diving, looking for an
answer on its own. And Thierry didn't put up any resistance. She knew that he couldn't; he was as caught
up as she was in what was happening between them, as overwhelmed.
There was nothing to stop her from finding the answer.
This revelation didn't come all in one blinding illumination. Instead it came in small flashes, each almost
too brief to understand.
Flash. Thierry's face above her. Not the gentle face she had seen by the porch. A savage face with an
animal light in the eyes. A snarling mouth ... and teeth red with blood.
No ...
Flash. Pain. Teeth that tore her throat. The feel of her blood spilling warm over her neck. Darkness
coming.
Oh, God, no...
Flash. A different face. A woman with black hair and eyes full of concern. "Don't you know? He's evil.
How many times does he have to kill you before you realize that?"
No, no, no, no...
But saying no didn't change anything.
It was the truth. She was seeing her own memories-seeing things that had really happened. She knew
that.
He'd killed her.
Hannah, no-
It was a cry of anguish. Hannah wrenched herself away. She could see the shock in Thierry's eyes, she
could feel him shaking.
"You really did it," she whispered.
"Hannah-"
"That's why you woke me up from the hypnosis! You didn't want me to remember! You knew I'd find
out the truth!" Hannah was beside herself with grief and anger. If she hadn't trusted him, if everything
hadn't been so perfect, she wouldn't have felt so betrayed. As it was, it was the greatest betrayal of her
life-of all her lives.
It had all been a lie-everything she'd just been feeling. The togetherness, the love, the joy ... all false.
"Hannah, that wasn't the reason...."
"You're evil! You're a killer!" She told me, Hannah thought. The woman with black hair; she told me the
truth. Why didn't I remember her? Why didn't I listen this time?
She could remember other things now, other things the woman had said. "He's unbelievably cunning...
he'll try to trick you. He'll try to use mind control ..."
Mind control. Influencing her. He'd admitted that.