His face went hard and still; his eyes darkened to the shade of evergreen smoke. "Jesus Christ, Leigh, what the hell is that?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?" He stood and took a few short, jerky steps away from me. "It looks like someone dug a furrow in your back with a butcher knife."
I winced. It had felt like that when it happened.
He caught my expression and gritted his teeth. "I'm sorry. It's just - " He moved his hands in a helpless gesture. I understood. My back wasn't pretty. I tried not to peek at it, either.
I hadn't let anyone see me naked since it happened. I could tell myself sex didn't interest me once Jimmy had died, and that was partly true. But nothing increases celibacy like a huge scar that runs from just below your left shoulder to your right hip. My days of wearing bikinis were over. Any hope of a backless wedding gown was as dead as my fiance. But I'd live.
Bummer.
"Who did that to you?" Damien asked.
I sat up, keeping my shoulders slanted away from him. His hands clenched; his muscles bunched.
"It was an accident," I lied.
As if I'd admit a werewolf had marked me as his forever.
Damien frowned. "What kind of accident?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Too bad. I do."
I got off the bed, crossed the floor, found my clothes. I didn't even realize I'd presented him with my back again until his fingers drifted over my left shoulder.
I yelped, jumped, spun. How had he followed so quickly and so quietly?
"Don't touch me," I whispered.
I couldn't bear for anyone to touch where Hector had.
"Does it hurt?"
"Of course not. It's been years."
In truth, the thing had been aching on and off since I'd seen, or imagined, the white wolf. But I wasn't going to confess that to anyone, ever.
"If it doesn't hurt, then why can't I touch you?"
"Why the hell do you think? It's ugly. I'm - "
I broke off. I'd wanted sex; I'd gotten it. Time to go.
"I have scars, too," he said quietly.
I glanced up. He pointed to his thigh where a thin white line bisected the skin. I snorted. "That's a scratch."
In truth, his body was damn near perfect. How had he gotten to be... twenty-something with only one small scar?
"Is this what you're trying so hard to forget?" he asked.
"I'll never forget."
How could I? The scar would be with me forever, along with the memories.
"Did one of the wolves hurt you?"
In the midst of putting on my shirt, I froze. "What wolves?"
"The ones you're after."
A chill trickled over my skin. How could he know who I was?
Then I remembered what sex had made me forget. The gun behind his toilet tank. The single silver bullet that I'd already used. I might be lying to him, but he was lying to me, too.
I finished dressing. Time to get back to work.
Damien lit a cigarette, stood at the window, naked, blowing smoke through his nose. He offered me a drag, but right now I didn't want to put my mouth where his had been. It might make me want to put my mouth other places.
"Who are you?" I asked.
He shrugged, the movement pulling his muscles tight, then releasing them. "No one."
"Then why were you hiding the gun?"
He frowned. "What gun?"
The complete bafflement on his face slowed me down. "Uh, the one behind the toilet tank."
He lifted a brow, then the cigarette to his mouth. Slowly he drew in, blew out. "When were you in my bathroom?"
Oops. I decided to be honest. About one thing anyway.
"I broke in."
"Emergency bathroom break?"
"Not exactly."
"What, exactly?"
I didn't know how to explain why I'd gone through his things. I'd had good reason, but none I could tell him.
Juger-Suchers were supposed to be a secret monster-hunting society. Secret. As in, need-to-know only. He didn't need to know.
There was a lot of that going around.
"Let me ask you a question," Damien murmured.
"Sure," I said, eager to get off the previous topic.
He pressed his thumb and forefinger together over the glowing stub. I blinked. That had to hurt, but he didn't flinch. I recalled the sensation of his scarred, rough hands dancing over my body. Maybe it didn't hurt anymore.
The cigarette extinguished, he flicked what was left end over end. It landed between my feet.
"Killing and burning wolves. Breaking and entering." He crossed the room, stopping so close I could smell the smoke on his breath. I wanted to lick his teeth. "Searching my room and finding a gun."
He didn't touch me, didn't have to. Just the scent of him, the heat, all that lovely pale skin and rippling muscle. My body remembered and it yearned.
His voice lowered, so soft I had to strain to hear him. "Who are you, Leigh?"
Danger, danger. Time to lie a little more.
"I told you. I'm with the DNR. The wolves..."
My mind blanked. What was my cover again?
"Right," he said. "That new strain of rabies."
"Yes." I let out a silent sigh of relief.
"Where's the gun?" he asked.
Hell.
"I - um - confiscated it."
"Confiscated? Can you do that?"
"Sure." I wasn't exactly sure, but he didn't need to know that, either. "Is it yours?"
"No."
"Then...?"
"When I moved in, you can bet I never looked behind the toilet tank. Who knows who lived here before me?"
Was he telling the truth? I kind of thought that he was.
If the gun was his, he was a very good actor. If the gun was his, what possible good could a single silver bullet do?
The question now was: Whose gun had it been?
Another job for Jessie McQuade.
"I have to go," I said.
He was still standing so close the hair on my arms prickled. He hadn't touched me since the ill-fated stroke to my back. I wanted him to, and because of that, I headed for the door.
"Wait."
With my hand on the knob, I stopped. He followed, reaching out to place a hand on my shoulder. I tensed, but he refused to let go. When I'd yearned for his touch, I hadn't meant there.
Because I yearned and hated myself for it, hated him, I lashed out. "This was a stupid idea."
"I know."
His quiet admission was like throwing ice water on my anger. I wasn't sure what to say. Sex had made me forget for a little while the realities of my life. But once the madness receded, I could see clearly again.
I was lying to him. He had no idea who I was. What I did. He had no idea how dangerous it was to know me. If he was around when the shit hit the fan - and it would; it was only a matter of time - he'd get hurt. He might get dead.
I yanked open the door. On the threshold I paused. All the cars were still there.