“I’m sorry I couldn’t do this with more detail,” he said softly. “I didn’t have a lot of time. Just imagine we’re back in that village, with electricity surging through the air between us.”
“But…” I looked over the power stones, seeing many familiar ones that I’d used back then. Their power was minuscule compared to the ones I’d collected since, but they still had their quirky personalities. “How did you get all this?”
“I had Darius’s people grab it out of your mom’s storage…just in case.”
I shook my head, running my finger over the tarot cards. In my hands, they were just paper with pictures on them. In my mother’s hands, they were the future unfolding.
I’d understood so little back in the day. So many things going on beneath the surface of my world without my knowledge.
“I don’t understand. Just in case…what?” I asked, sentimentality swelling in my heart. I remembered when he’d first sat down in that rickety chair, facing me as he was doing now. He’d given me advice that had forever changed my life.
You don’t need more than what exists in the wild. You just need the strength of your will to make it so.
“I need to tell you what happened to me when my brother died,” he started.
I listened in rapture and with a sinking heart as he opened up about the horror he’d faced. It had wounded him deeply—I’d already known that, but I hadn’t quite understood the extent of it. Callie had explained what a dual-mage connection was, and the risks if your partner were to die, but she hadn’t explained it like this.
Hearing that the man I loved had gone through such torture tore me apart. Brought tears to my eyes. All that pain. All that misery. And on top of it, he still blamed himself for not being there. He still blamed himself for not being able to warn his brother, and not going with him, and not fighting beside him.
I sat quietly, not moving, as tears rolled down my cheeks. Pain clouded his gaze as he finished his story, willing me to understand what he’d told me.
“We don’t need to form that connection,” I said into the following silence. “I don’t need it. I’m happy just as we are.”
He shook his head, his gaze connected to mine, his body too far away. “You’re only saying that because you think I’m afraid to feel that pain again.”
I clasped my hands, because he was right, and clearly I was not picking up what he was putting down.
“I won’t let you die, Penny Bristol. That might mean I will go before you. And I cannot…” He paused, shook himself slightly, and started again. “I do not want to put you through what I went through.”
“I’ll be in pain regardless. But like I said, we don’t have to do this. We already work perfectly together. That’s plenty for me. As long as you don’t take off again, I’m good.” I wiped a hot tear off my cheek.
He sat very still. “I’m worried. You are the genius that creates mischief as you discover your magic. I am the experienced mage that sorts everything out. But this time…” His chest inflated with his deep inhale. “I don’t know what’s happening inside of you. I can’t help you. In trying to do what I think is best for you, I could be hurting you more than we know.”
I leaned my forearms onto the rickety card table before remembering it was a bad idea. It groaned as I leaned back again, threatening to collapse. “So…I’m confused. What now?”
“A dual-mage pair…shares magic, in a way. No, that’s not right…” He furrowed his brow as he scratched his nose. “It’s like…it boosts both of the mages’ magic and, in so doing, merges them and their magic in a way. Kind of creates a level plane on which they can both work.”
“Okay…” I didn’t get it.
“And through that connection, I’ll be able to look under the hood, so to speak. I’ll be able to see what that goblin magic is really doing to you, and hopefully help sort it out. Because it’ll affect me in the same way.”
“Right.” I went to lean forward again before stopping myself. “So where does this leave us?”
He took a deep breath, and for reasons I couldn’t explain, I got a surge of butterflies in my belly. He dug into his pocket and pulled out a little blue velvet box before setting it on the table.
Nervousness and love dripped from his eyes. “Penelope Bristol, you’ve affected me from the first touch. You’ve been on my mind, haunting my thoughts in the best possible ways, from that moment until this one. I’ve loved you from the beginning, but for a while I got in my own way. I respect you. I cherish you. I am so very, very—” His voice hitched. He clasped his hands on his lap and looked down at them for a moment, trying to choke back the emotion. “I’m so very proud of you. Of your courage to be unapologetically different. Of your willingness to try anything. Of your steadfastness and loyalty. The druid read you perfectly. You are pure of heart, and you always have been. You are the shining light in my life. How I find my way home. I love you more than I can express.”
I could barely breathe. New tears made a trail down my cheeks.
He reached forward and unclasped the box. It creaked as it opened. Within sat a ring with a glimmering purple stone, pumping with a deep power that soaked down through my middle and warmed up my body.
“I went through every power stone Darius could collect for me,” Emery said, and now his voice shook. His smile was faint. “That vampire will go out of his way to get what he wants.” His smile slipped and nervousness took over his expression. “This stone made me think of you. Beautiful, pure, and deep. Will you…”
He swallowed, and I waited with bated breath for what would come next.
18
He pulled his hands away from the box. “Penny Bristol, will you be my forever? Will you share your life with me? You can choose how—if you’re willing, that is.” His smile didn’t break through his nervousness. But I couldn’t put him at ease. My heart had taken over the whole of my chest and I’d stopped breathing. I could scarcely think through the flurries in my stomach. “I offer myself to you however you will take me. As my wife, as my dual-mage, as my life partner, or as that creepy guy who lives next door and waits outside to say hello every morning and goodnight every evening.” His smile amplified his handsomeness. “Well. Maybe not that last one. You’d probably sic Reagan on me.”
I huffed out a laugh, and I was crying again. Huge, joyous tears rolled down my face. “But your past?”
He shrugged, and for once, he was hunching like I usually did. “It wouldn’t be fair of me to make that decision for you, Penny. You have all the information now, so you should choose your own destiny. Either way, whatever you choose, I…” He shrugged again. “I hope to be a part of it.”
My hand shook as it reached out for the ring, but veered at the last minute and rested on the fake crystal ball instead. “Does my mother know this is happening?” I vaguely remembered what she’d said in the car. “She does.”
“She knows,” he said. “She didn’t threaten me away from you this time, so I figured that was a good sign.”
I laughed, looking at the ring. I couldn’t bring myself to touch it. To see if it fit. It was hard to believe I could be so lucky. Or so happy. It felt like a dream, and I worried that if I touched the ring, I’d wake up. “The others?”
“Darius and Reagan have been pushing for this. Darius for his own reasons, and Reagan because she wants me to fix you.” His smile was soft. “Like you have already fixed me.”
I took a deep breath. One of many. I had to risk waking up.
Steeling my courage, I gingerly slid my fingers across the smooth surface of the small power stone, about the size of a two-carat diamond. A pleasant vibration welled up inside of me. It felt like love. Emery’s love. He’d chosen perfectly.
I wiped a tear away with the back of my hand. “I don’t want us to become dual-mages if you have reservations. I meant what I said. I’m happy to stay like we are if that’s where you’d rather be.”