“Sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “It was a long ride. I can barely feel my fingers.”

Jenn gave me a sympathetic look, one that seemed completely sincere. I don’t know why that surprised me; it’s not like I ever had a reason to think Jenn didn’t like me…I mean, just because I didn’t like her.

And now I was actually feeling really bad for being such a bitch about her this whole time. She really wasn’t the evil whore I was making her out to be. Was she?

She walked over, her heels clicking across the hardwood, and reached out with her hands, “Want me to take the rest of your stuff to your room?”

“No, it’s fine, I can manage,” I said. I took a step towards her, but the squeak of my wet boots reminded me that it was probably rude of me to tread through her (their) apartment. I stooped down to begin the laborious process of untying them but she told me to not bother.

“We’re not fussy here,” she added, and beckoned me to come over. I wasn’t sure if I believed that. Even though Dex was probably a little bit messy, the apartment was looking spotless and most likely all thanks to Jenn. Oh, well. If I could keep my boots on, I was keeping them on.

“Is this where I’m bunking down?” I asked.

“Yes, sorry it’s such a mess,” Jenn said, and touched my shoulder gently, guiding me into the room that was tiny and not a mess at all. “It’s obviously not a true bedroom since there isn’t even a window. Dex uses it as his office.”

I put my purse and helmet down on the tiny single bed covered in fancy, pistachio green linen and eyed his desk in the corner, which held up a massive flat screen Mac monitor and a range of other technical equipment. A column of clear boxes containing cameras and photographic stuff were stacked beside it. The shelves above the computer were almost keeling over with a plethora of books that ranged from Paranormal Normal? to The Demise of the Record Industry to Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. On the other side of the desk were two guitars and one bass propped up in their stands. The walls of the room were covered from floor to ceiling with framed photographs of rock stars and arty concert posters such as Secret Chiefs 3 and The Cars. Aside from the pretty green bedspread, this room was definitely all Dex.

“I hope you don’t mind,” she added. “Just ignore all his shit in the corner.”

At that comment, it occurred to me how little Jenn knew about me and how little I knew about her. I decided it was time for me to suck it up, once again.

I faced her straight on, looking into her bright and seemingly earnest eyes, and said, “Thank you so much for letting me stay with you and Dex this week. I really appreciate it.”

She waved me away with a bashful look that seemed more coquettish than anything else. “Oh please, I insisted that you stay with us. Dex wanted to put you up in the shitty hotel down the street.”

Before I could even wonder about that, I heard the front door open and the sound of canine nails clacking wildly across the floor, along with wheezy dog breath.

A small white French Bulldog ran past the door, skidded to a stop, and then came back and ran straight for us.

The dog, who I assumed was Fat Rabbit since he did kind of look like a fat rabbit, jumped up on my shins like a wriggly, bug-eyed cylinder of excitement.

“This is Harvey,” Jenn said proudly.

I tore my face away from the sloppy doggy kisses and looked up at her. “I thought his name was Fat Rabbit?”

Jenn’s eyes rolled straight to heaven and I heard Dex’s unmistakable burst of laughter from outside the door.

“Have you been telling everyone his name is Fat Rabbit?!” she exclaimed.

“Well he looks like a fat rabbit,” Dex said, appearing in the doorway with that smart-ass grin on his face and a wet leash in his hands.

I expected the feeling to go all out of my body again like it had a few minutes ago, but that didn’t happen. There was just a tiny prickle of heat at my heart. He looked good, of course, with his neat trace of a ‘stache, broad chin, and silky black hair. His nose looked a tiny bit different and I immediately felt a wash of guilt, but other than that he was looking as devilishly handsome as ever. Especially as his dark eyes lit up noticeably when they met with mine.

I looked away before it became a lustful staring contest and I eyed Jenn with nervous humor. “Hey, Harvey was a fat rabbit too.”

She looked confused. She looked over at Dex for an explanation.

“It’s a film, babe,” he explained to her. “Harvey. With Jimmy Stewart. Big invisible rabbit. You know…”

She shook her head and I smirked internally, happy that Dex and I both knew something she didn’t. I met his eyes again and felt the usual pull towards him. Seeing him in front of me made me feel…well, not whole, I wouldn’t go that far, but it made me feel like everything was just right.

Except it wasn’t. Because I was suddenly very aware that I couldn’t go around staring at him all dopey eyed like I sometimes did, because his girlfriend, the Wine Babe Jenn, was in the same room as us. Fat Rabbit, too.

In fact I had expected that Dex would have come over and given me a hug hello, only he didn’t. He just nodded at me, still leaning in the doorway and said, “How was the ride over?”

“Wet,” I answered. At that, Fat Rabbit jumped up again and Jenn scooped him up in her arms. They were a lot more buff and toned that I had thought they’d be.

“Harvey, Harvey, Harvey,” she said to the dog who was gazing up at her perfect tawny face with googly eyes.

“You girls hungry?” Dex asked while he watched this for a few seconds, looking amused.

I was but I waited for Jenn to say something. She walked over to him with the dog in her arms and paused right in front of him.


“Call him Harvey,” she said, holding him out. “You’re his dad, call him by his proper name.”

Dex smirked, took the dog’s ear in one hand and whispered, “Fat Rabbit” into it.

Jenn let out a cry of flirty disgust and slapped Dex on his ass. He jumped a bit, pretending it hurt, and grinned at her. A grin I used to think was reserved solely for me.

OK. This was hell. I know what I had imagined earlier but now that I was actually seeing it, it was causing an involuntary narrowing of the eyes. It wasn’t the jealousy so much (OK, it was), it was that feeling that Dex knew how I felt about him and yet, here they were...it was uncomfortable, to say the least.

Jenn and Fat Rabbit left the room and Dex raised his ringed eyebrow at me. “How about you kiddo, you hungry?”

Kiddo. Least I still had that. It was better than “Babe.”

“I’m freaking starving,” I admitted.

He nodded. “I thought as much. I figured you’d be after the ride and shit and anyway so a bunch of people are going to meet us for lunch. That cool? They are all Shownet peeps, good people, and it will make the party on Friday a lot easier to handle once you know how retarded they are in real life.”

I couldn’t tell if he was speaking quicker than normal because of his medication or if he was nervous. But I told him that was fine. Secretly, I preferred it. Being around other people would take a lot of the awkwardness out of the situation and as much as I’d like to think it was all in my head, as most things usually were, I knew both Jenn and Dex could feel it too. This was going to be one hell of a long week.

“Good,” he said, smiling at me in a calmer, more natural, way. He looked around the room briefly. “How do you like my man cave?”

“It’s very you,” I admitted and patted the bed. “Though I thought you’d have a Star Wars-themed bedspread.”

“Believe me, I wanted to,” he said.

“You’re thirty-two Dex, not eighteen,” Jenn chided him, now with the dog and a bowl of water in hand. She explained to me, “We have to keep Harvey in the bathroom when we’re gone or else he runs around and tears up the place.”

“And takes a dump in your shoes,” Dex added.

I had to laugh at that. Jenn grunted. “It was one time, all right?”

“Easy for you to say. They weren’t your shoes,” Dex said, heading out of the room. I followed, still giggling.

“I hope you didn’t find that out the hard way,” I told him. He looked down at me, eyes sparkling.

“More like the soft way.”

Even though the topic of dog shit wasn’t exactly sexy, I was standing next to him in the doorway and this was the closest I had been to him in weeks. He smelled good as always, and that damn current of electricity was sparking again.

“Don’t be disgusting,” Jenn said, placing Fat Rabbit down on the floor with the water and quickly shutting the door before he ran out of the room. The closed door was met with barks and the clattering of nails against it.

“He’ll stop barking after five minutes,” she said, and sashayed her way to the kitchen counter, pausing at a bowl.

“Your car or mine?” she asked him loudly above the doggy protests. In one quick motion she pulled a small bottle of hand sanitizer out of her purse, rubbed it on her dainty hands and put it back.

“It’s up to Perry,” Dex said, turning to me. “Do you like good music or bad music?”

I opened my mouth to say something, or perhaps to just make a noise, since it felt like a trick question, but Jenn picked up a pair of keys out of the bowl and said, “We’ll take my car. You’re parked on the street and it’ll be hard to find a spot later.”

“Oh, how considerate of you,” he said sarcastically as we left the apartment.

In the hallway, Jenn shut the door and locked it while Dex stood at her side, leering at her in a weird half annoyed, half playful way. I didn’t like it. This bickering seemed to be something natural to them, like an actual living and breathing couple who were in love with each other.

That thought took my breath away.

Jenn stuck her house keys in her purse and gave me a funny look, perhaps catching the expression on my face. I don’t know what face I was making, but it couldn’t have been a happy one.

“Honestly,” she said to me in a confiding tone, “I just don’t want to listen to Dex play his Crooked Eagles album for the millionth time this week. I couldn’t give a shit about Tom Jones.”

“Them Crooked Vultures,” he said, exasperated. He put his arm around her and my breath was lost once more. “And it’s John Paul Jones. Not Tom Jones.”

OK. So the cutesy couple bickering pained me and the fact that, right in front of me, just two feet away, he had his arm around her and was staring at her with a, well, not disgusted look on his face, that absolutely hurt. I mean, hurt like a hot, poison-tinged knife was going through my stomach. But I was going to get through this. I had to. Right? RIGHT?!

I looked away. I had to or else I would have kept staring at them, mouth open, looking lovelorn and stupid. I looked down at the carpet.

“Nice carpet,” I remarked. Like an idiot.

There was silence for a moment.

“Perry’s very observant,” Dex finally said to Jenn and out of the corner of my eye I could see him kiss her on her skinny cheekbone. I wished the carpet would swallow me whole.



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