Ben wanted to touch, but knew if he did Dante would pull the brakes, so he forced himself to keep doing as he was told. Not as though it was a hardship, the blowjob, but not taking over was. He had to keep himself focused on it.
“That’s it. You’re doing very well, Ben. Use your tongue on my crown now, lick it and suck it like a good boy. No hands.”
Ben pulled off. Dante’s erection bounced against his stomach before Ben circled the head with his tongue. Pulled just the tip into his mouth and sucked. He tasted more salt. He wanted more. Wanted to inhale Dante’s scent. Wanted to suck him so hard the man came in his mouth. Maybe suck his finger and use it on Dante’s asshole, but he continued to force himself only to do as Dante said.
Ben stopped when he felt a hand tighten in his hair. He looked up, the crown of Dante’s dick still in his mouth as Dante fisted his hair.
“I’m going to fuck your mouth. I won’t give you too much. You can pull off if you’re not sure you can take it but my hand will still be in your hair. I’ll know what you need.”
And Ben knew he would. That was a part of it, reading who you’re with and knowing what they want or don’t.
He nodded and then opened his mouth a little wider for Dante before the man thrust his hips forward. Ben nearly gagged that first time but he adjusted quickly.
The top of his head stung from where Dante held his hair. He swallowed down each time Dante pumped his hips forward, making his prick go down the back of Ben’s throat. He kept his mind on what he was doing, keeping his muscles relaxed and swallowing when need be.
His own cock ached in his jeans, the need to come so fucking close without so much as a touch. Ben forced himself to hold off as he instead enjoyed the thick rod in his mouth.
The muscles in Dante’s stomach flexed as he fucked. His grip on Ben’s hair tightened and damned if that didn’t make his dick even harder.
When Dante pulled out, Ben leaned forward, wanting more. The hand in his hair stopped him. He looked up at Dante who shook his head. “Eager, aren’t you?” he asked.
There was a voice in the back of Ben’s head telling him to argue with that. Telling him to call Dante the cocky bastard he was, but the voice was overpowered by another. Not all the other shit he’d been dealing with but the one that told him he was eager. The one that hungered for whatever they would do next. For release and pleasure. In this moment, that was all that mattered to him. He needed nothing else.
So he didn’t reply. He continued to kneel and wait for what Dante told him next. The waiting took over his thoughts, blocked out everything else. Shielded him from the part of himself that knew this should make him feel weak.
“Stand up,” Dante told him, and Ben did.
“Take off the rest of your clothes,” he ordered, and Ben did that as well.
Dante’s eyes traveled down, and when they came back up again, when they met Ben’s, he saw something else there—regret? Fear? Self hatred? Whatever it was that Ben saw in Dante’s eyes, he thought it would make Dante tell him to go. That he would call an end to this, but as quickly as the glimpse inside him came, it was gone. Blocked off by his hard, dark stare.
It was in that quick moment, he saw more of who Dante was. The hate he had for himself and the barrier he kept between himself and others.
Just like Ben.
They were so similar, the two of them. Strangely, Ben found comfort in that.
“Put a pillow in the middle of the bed. Put it under your ass and lie on your back. I’ll be right back.”
Dante didn’t wait for Ben to do as he said before walking out of the room.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Ben waited.
He turned his head to the side, watching the door as he lay on Dante’s bed like he was told, and waited. The longer he was there, the less blood flowed to his erection. He started to go soft and the other voices in his head got louder. The ones that reminded him of everything he’d done wrong and how fucking weak he was for waiting for a man to come into the room and own him.
He shouldn’t have to wait. Not for anyone. He’d done enough of that for Tristan and he refused to be someone’s fool again.
It was at about the twenty minute mark that he couldn’t take it anymore. Ben sat up just as the door opened and Dante came in again. His dick was soft, and fire burned in his eyes as he saw Ben sitting up.
In a steely voice, Dante asked, “Is there a problem?” He didn’t give Ben a chance to reply before he continued, “Lay down like I told you to. Now.”
Damned if Ben didn’t do it. Didn’t question it either. Or maybe he just blocked that part out. He couldn’t say for sure. The only thing Ben did know was he eagerly went back on the bed like Dante told him to and waited.