“That bad?”
He nodded, frowning. “Oh, yeah.”
I couldn’t imagine. I mean, I’d seen the cameras in front of Marlena’s house back when they started to get huge, and that alone was overwhelming. Anything worse and I cringed to think.
He glanced at me. “Know any spots?”
“Um,” I thought for a moment. It wasn’t like I had a brain map of “hiding spots” to dig up. “Well, the only thing that pops up is our hiding place.”
It took him a few seconds before he understood, and he smiled widely at me. “The creek?”
I nodded, feeling my face warm. “If you want.”
“Absolutely.”
The drive there wasn’t long, but even after all these years, I’d never returned to the outskirts of town. I felt a little anxious, and my stomach sank when we passed the trailer park we grew up in. I didn’t turn my head to look at it, but I saw, in my peripheral, Carter’s head turn. He looked stone-faced, but I caught him gripping the steering wheel tighter.
“Pretty depressing,” he remarked quietly under his breath.
It was.
Moments later we approached the road we used to cross that cut into the nature reserve. He parked along the side of the road and we stepped out. I ogled his shiny car before saying, “I’m not sure it’s a good idea to leave this unattended. It’s sticking out like a sore thumb, and if anyone dodgy passes by, they might take a crack at it.”
“It’s just a rental,” he replied on a shrug. “If anyone fucks it up, I’ll pay up. I’m not going to bitch about money when we’re doing something like this together. For once, let whatever happen happen.”
I smiled at him. “Alright.”
I grabbed my bag in case it did get broken into. There was no way I was going to leave my wallet with all the money I had in the world in it. He stopped beside me and we stared thoughtfully into the bush. Then, he offered me his hand and I took it.
Together, we walked back into the forest, out of the sunshine and under the shade of the large thick trees. It was different, but familiar all at once. I recognized the massive tree I used to hide behind when I stalked Carter in here, and when the creek came into view, I squeezed his hand excitedly.
“This is pretty cool,” I told him.
“Just like old times.”
I dropped my bag beside the fallen tree I used to sit on and watched the water move slowly over the rocks. It looked amazingly refreshing in the heat. As if reading my mind, Carter kicked off his shoes and socks and I did the same. Letting go of his hand, we slowly neared the edge of the creek, until the cool water flooded our feet inch by inch. It felt good. A nice break from the heat.
“Fuck, this is nice,” he said, glancing up and along the large trees bordering the creek. “I don’t get this level of quiet anymore.”
“Me neither,” I replied. “Although, I imagine it’s worse for you. All those people.”
“So many people,” he acknowledged. “It’d be nice to move back out here one day. You know, away from the noise, from the city and the crowd. Just have a nice little plot of land, overlooking the mountains maybe, and a solid little house. No more interviews, no more cameras, just quiet and peace.”
I stared at him as he spoke. Yet again, he’d opened up a side of him he’d never shown me before. He didn’t seem guarded, or worried. He genuinely looked at peace, and it made me smile sadly. We’d have to go back eventually. Back to all that noise he loathed. I wished we could freeze time, so that nothing existed outside of us.
“Maybe one day,” I told him wistfully. “When you’re done with being a rock star.”
He looked at me then, his want apparent, when he responded gravely, “I can do it now. I can leave it all behind. Do you want that?”
I didn’t answer for a moment. I looked down at the water as it moved past me, and I swallowed nervously. “You’re an amazing singer.”
“I don’t care.”
“You make people happy when you sing.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Yes, it does,” I argued, shooting him a knowing glance. “I watched you sing, Carter. I… I went to your concert. You captivated an entire crowd and I was speechless. Absolutely speechless. It’s what you were born to do, and watching you up there, I know you love it. I know it makes you feel alive. I know that because you made everyone else feel alive. It’s an incredible superpower, and I know you don’t want to stop.”
He didn’t answer, and I looked again at him. He was shocked, his eyes wide, his mouth half open. Then, he moved closer to me, and I turned my body to him as he stopped in front of me.
“You went to my concert?” he asked.
“Of course I did.”
“I sort of figured you didn’t care to.”
I scoffed. “I bought a ticket every time you were coming into the city, but I never had the guts to go until the last one.”
“Why?”
I shrugged. “I thought I was done hurting at that point. You know, three years is a very long time –”
“I know,” he cut in with a heart-wrenching voice. “I know three years is a long time because I felt every single moment of it pass by. And I missed you every second of it.”
You couldn’t hear words like that without feeling like your heart wasn’t going to explode. I couldn’t speak, and my eyes were misting. He ran his finger along the side of my face and then he pulled away, taking my hand with him. We turned back and sat down on the hard ground, his back against the fallen tree, and me between his legs. My back rested against his front, and I didn’t care for a single moment that I was meant to have let him go, that touching him at all was wrong.
This was yet again our bubble. Our time revisiting the past, and it felt right.
I couldn’t resist.
He squeezed my hand, and we silently watched the stream for a while. I’d never felt this kind of peace in a long time.
“Tell me about your life,” I then said, wanting to fill the space with his voice.
“Nothing much to tell,” he replied softly, his other hand moving to my shoulder where he squeezed the knots out gently. “It’s just been music and people, and not much else.”
“What about when you tour? Is it really all groupies and crazy sex?”