She heard him moving around, and then he was in front of her again, gently taking the tray from her hands. She glanced shyly up at him; her face flaming even hotter as she saw that he had put his shirt back on. He knew that it had unsettled her. She truly was an idiot, she thought with an inward groan. An immature, foolish, idiot.
He placed the tray back on the bureau and swiftly returned to her. Taking hold of her hands he knelt before her again. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
She glanced at him from under lowered lids, trying desperately not to blush even more, but failing miserably. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable. Really.”
It wasn’t a lie, he hadn’t made her uncomfortable. He had made her many things, but uncomfortable was not one of them. He leaned in closer, looking wonderfully boyish and hopeful as he peered up at her. She couldn’t help but smile at him, enchanted by his emerald eyes. She had missed him so much, ached for him every day, and yet she had turned him away. What had she been thinking?
Though she knew that she had been hurt, deeply wounded, stricken with grief, it was still not an excuse. “You look exhausted,” he said softly.
Cassie shrugged absently, fiddling idly with the pleat in the workout pants she wore to bed. “Maybe a little,” she whispered.
“When was the last time you slept?”
Shrugging again, she glanced past him to the doorway. She had slept in bits and spurts but nothing solid, and it was always plagued and restless. “I’ve slept here and there,” she admitted softly.
His eyes flickered with that brief flash of worry again. Cassie frowned, surprised by the distress that came from him. “You need to sleep.”
Cassie shook her head. “The nightmares,” she whispered, frightened by the horrifying images that haunted her sleep. Nightmares about what her grandmother’s last moments must have been like, how frightened she must have been, and how painful they must have been.
“I’ll keep the nightmares at bay.”
Cassie’s eyes filled with tears, she reached out to gently stroke him, loving the feel of his hard cheek beneath her palm. She managed a tremulous smile, not wanting to hurt his feelings, but doubtful that he could actually keep them away. She nodded though, knowing that all he wanted was to take care of her and make sure that she was well.
“Yes.”
He took hold of her hands, helping her to her feet. Cassie was surprised by the relief that filled her as she climbed onto her bed, curling beneath the comforters he draped over her. The pillow felt like heaven, the sheets were deliciously soft against her skin. Devon closed the door and turned off the light, moments later he was crawling into bed beside her. Cassie cuddled against him as he pulled her tight to him.
He felt wonderful against her, his strong arms wrapped tight around her. She had forgotten just how right it felt to have him curled up against her, making her feel safe and loved. Her eyes began to drift close, the tranquility that settled over her lulled her swiftly to sleep.
CHAPTER 6
Cassie woke slowly, blinking against the rays that filtered through the blinds of her windows. She frowned as she studied those rays, momentarily puzzled by them. It had been so long since she had not watched the sun rise. She didn’t recall falling asleep, but she must have, and apparently she had slept through the entire night. Without nightmares.
Devon’s arm was wrapped tightly around her, his hard body pressed against her back. She did not feel completely rested, but she definitely felt better. She was also at peace for the first time in so very long. Tears of relief and grief choked her, falling slowly down her cheeks to wet her pillow. Devon’s arm tightened around her, drawing her closer as he nuzzled her hair gently.
“Don’t cry love.”
His words only made her cry harder. He kissed her cheek gently, wiping away her tears with the pad of his thumb. Cassie rolled over to face him; burying her face in his shoulder as she wrapped her arms around him. He held her gently as she cried.
Slowly her tears subsided. Though she was beginning to fear that they would never completely subside, at least not for a little while. Not until she truly grieved for her grandmother, something she had not allowed herself to do for the past two weeks. Though, she doubted she would be given much time to grieve, at least not if Isla and Julian had anything to do with it. Pulling slowly back from him, she looked up into Devon’s much loved face. His jaw was tight, a muscle twitched in his cheek. His eyes were hard, flat; distant.
It was a look she knew well.
“You need to feed,” she said softly.
He managed a brief nod, looking as if he were in pain. Being this close to her was torture for him, especially when he had gone a long while without feeding. And he had been so busy taking care of her last night that he had not taken care of himself. As she studied him, a thought occurred to her. A consuming need began to build rapidly inside of her.
“What about me?”
He blinked in surprise, recoiling slightly. “Cassie…”
“You can feed from me Devon.”
“No!” he said sharply, recoiling even further from her, but she could see the rapidly building hunger and desire flaming through his eyes. He wanted this; she knew that, he wanted it as badly as she did. He was just being stubborn.
“It’s ok Devon, you won’t hurt me.”
Moving swiftly away, he swung his legs over the side of the bed. His hands gripped the mattress so fiercely that the muscles in his arms stood out sharply. His back was ramrod straight, but a small tremor shook him. Cassie reached out to touch his back, but he pulled away, looking as if he was about to bolt away from her.
“You won’t hurt me,” she said again.
He swung toward her, his eyes flashing briefly from their beautiful emerald to a fierce blood red that robbed her of her breath. “You don’t know that!” he snarled.
Though he caused her heartbeat to speed up, the fear that trickled through her was brief and small. He would not hurt her, she was certain of that. He would never hurt her. “I do,” she said softly. “You could never hurt me Devon.”
He shuddered again. “Cassie your blood, well it’s a temptation I’m not sure I can refuse.”
“You can,” she said forcefully. “I know that you can. I want this Devon; I want to take care of you like you take care of me. I want to ease your need. I want to know what you feel like.”
He shuddered again, his hands clenched upon the bed so hard she thought he was going to rip her mattress apart. She could almost hear his teeth grinding as he fought a fierce battle with himself. Cassie sat up slowly, pushing her blankets aside. She reached out for him, her hand stroked over his rigid back. Though he stiffened even more, he did not bolt away from her as she had feared. He was fighting hard with himself, but it was a losing battle, she was almost positive of that.
A surge of victory began to build inside her, but she fought it swiftly back. There was no place for victory here. There was only room for the two of them. “Cassie,” he moaned, his head bowing slightly.
“It’s ok,” she whispered. “I’m here and I’m willing. It’s ok.”
He turned slowly toward her, rapidly searching her face, looking for any hint of fear. Any hint that she didn’t truly want this. “If I hurt you…”
“You won’t.”
A muscle twitched in his cheek, Cassie soothed it with her hand, pressing her forehead against his. “You’re wounded and hurt now.”
“And you’ve helped to heal me.”
“Weakened.”
She managed a small smile. “Not so much anymore, and I am still stronger than any human.”
“If I lose control…”
“You won’t.”
He stared silently at her, his awe and hunger beat against her shaking deep into her soul. Moving slowly, she wrapped her hand around the back of his neck, kissing him gently. He remained hard against her, unyielding. She felt a brief moment of guilt, this was torturing him, but if she could ease his need, his hunger, than she was going to do so. She wanted to be the one to help him. She wanted to be the one that he turned too. And she desperately wanted to know what it would feel like.
She was surprised that the thought did not repulse her more. Before she had met him it would have disgusted her completely, but now it thrilled and emboldened her. With him, it would be wonderful. She was certain of that, even though she had no reason to believe that it would be. Everything she had seen of vampires feeding was gross, brutal, and deadly.
It would not be so now.
She kissed him again, pressing her lips lightly to his. Though he still did not move against her, she felt a weakening in his body, a yielding that curled her toes in anticipation and excitement. Then, suddenly, his arm snaked firmly around her, locking her in place. He was kissing her back, his mouth hard and demanding against hers.
Cassie’s heart hammered wildly in her chest, her fingers tangled in his hair as he pressed tighter against her. She gasped in surprise when he swiftly lifted her and laid her on the bed. For a moment he pulled back, his eyes questioning and worried even though they blazed with his fiery longing. She managed a small nod and a smile.
When he came back to her, his kiss was no longer wild with urgency, but so sweet and gentle that it nearly broke her heart. He kissed her for a long time. Cassie savored in the delicious sensations he aroused in her body, losing herself to him completely. Slowly, it began to change as his hunger beat against her. She didn’t know how long it had been since he had fed, but she suspected that he had not been doing it as often as he should.
And that was her fault. He had been so busy worrying and watching over her that he had not been taking care of himself. Guilt tugged at Cassie as she became even more desperate to be the one to ease his torment.
Grasping his head, Cassie knew she would have to make the first move here. He would not go forth otherwise. Gently guiding his head down, she turned her head to allow him better access to her neck. He hesitated for a moment, his mouth hot against her skin. His body stiffened against hers once more. Cassie’s heart thumped loudly in anticipation, each beat pounded like a drum in her ears.
She waited breathlessly; scared to move for fear he would pull away. Then, with a small moan, he brushed his lips lightly against the tender skin of her neck. Cassie’s hands tightened in his hair as she felt the fluttering brush of his fangs. Another light kiss stroked over her, and then he struck.
Cassie arched off the bed, a small gasp of pain escaping as her hands clenched upon him. His hand entangled lightly in her hair, pulling her head back as he sank deeper, drinking forcefully in long, greedy gulps. His other arm locked firmly around her waist, pulling her against him. Cassie groaned, falling back upon the bed, turning her head to the side as the pain faded away and pleasure rushed forward to engulf her in waves that left her breathless and limp. Her tight grip eased on him as she became suffused in a world of ecstasy and pleasure.
It took her a moment to realize that it was his pleasure she was feeling. It surrounded her, wrapping her within a tight cocoon of warmth and need. His love consumed her, swallowing her completely. It was so true, so pure that it robbed all logical thought from her. It pounded against her, over her, through her. It ended all her doubts, and any lack of self confidence she had ever experienced in his presence.
She suddenly saw herself through his eyes, and to him she was beautiful, loving; strong. He knew that she was not perfect, and he loved her even more for her faults, accepting every one of them. However there was nothing about her that he would change, or would even think about changing. Tears burned her eyes as her heart swelled, feeling as if it were going to burst with joy.
She could also feel his hunger. The thirst that was constantly with him, that plagued him at all times. The battle he fought with himself constantly, especially around her, to maintain control of his murderous instincts. The depth of his need and want for her was staggering. It shook her thoroughly. And something she had never thought could be possible began to happen, her love for him grew. The control it took for him to be around her was far more than she ever could have imagined, and she loved him even more for his ability, and desire, to do so.
Cassie tried desperately to relay her own pleasure and love to him, praying fervently that it reached him as easily as his reached her. She held him tighter, cradling him against her, unaware of the tears of joy and love that slid down her face. “I love you,” she whispered over and over, just in case her thoughts were not reaching him, she wanted her words too.
Even when he bit deeper, harder, she felt no fear. She simply allowed herself to drift inside of his love, gratification, and delight. Her fingers curled tighter into his hair, pulling him closer to her. Though she knew he could kill her, she didn’t want this to ever end, and there was no fear that he would do so. This bond was so intimate and wonderful that she never wanted it to stop.