“I’m saying that I think you should go home.”
“But what about the engagement?”
“It was fake. We both know that. It was a stupid idea. I shouldn’t have taken advantage of your good nature. I just wanted to be with you. I wanted to see what we...” His voice trailed off and he looked away. “It’s not important now.”
“So that’s it, then? After everything, that’s it?”
“What do you want me to say?” He grabbed my hand. “You don’t belong in this world.”
“Because I’m a poor American?”
“No.” His fingers gripped my hand tighter. “That has nothing to do with it.”
“Then why?”
“Why do you even want to stay, after what just happened?”
“Because I like you,” I said softly. What was so hard for him to understand? Didn’t he get that I had come with him because I thought he was cute? That everything had been exciting for me because I liked him? I’d been attracted to him the first time I saw him in the museum. He’d been my sex god, and the fact that he had been attracted to me as well had ignited a feeling inside of me that I hadn’t been able to quell.
“I’m not a good guy to like.” He frowned.
“You could become a good guy to like.”
“You think it’s that easy?” He cocked his head and surveyed my face, then smirked. “You’re so young and naive, Lola. I will never become a good guy.”
“Maybe I don’t want a good guy.” I shrugged, my eyes never leaving his. “Maybe I want a guy that can take me on an adventure and never let me go.”
“Do you really think you can handle that, Lola?” His green eyes looked at me skeptically. “Do you really think you’re prepared for an adventure that has no guarantee of a happy ending?”
“When does anything have a guarantee of a happy ending?” I answered him honestly as I thought back to my past relationships and heartbreaks. I liked Xavier, and even though I didn’t know what game he was playing, I still wanted to get to know him better. He intrigued me and infuriated me, but I couldn’t walk away from him. Not now and not yet. Not after everything we'd been through.
“Very true.” He gazed at me and then turned away. “We can talk again tomorrow. Tonight has been too much drama. You’re overwhelmed and don’t know what you’re saying. Tomorrow we can decide where we want to go from here.”
“Okay,” I whispered, feeling worried. His words sounded ominous, and I was scared that he was going to tell me that I was going to have to leave. But that wasn’t what scared me the most. What scared me was that as much as I didn’t want to leave, another part of me really wanted to go. I wanted to leave and go back to London and pretend that I’d never met Xavier Van Romerius before in my life. And that was something that saddened me more than anything.
Chapter Two
Xavier
I didn’t realize how easy it was to be a murderer. I didn’t know how easy it was to have murderous thoughts. That was until tonight. Tonight I knew how easy it could be to kill someone. I knew that because I’d wanted to kill Casper and Tarquin when I’d seen them in the room with Lola. My gentle, sweet, unassuming Lola. She’d so nearly been taken advantage of by my two cousins, and I would have done anything to make them pay for what they’d done. I was so angry with them and with myself. I wondered what I’d been thinking to expose her to this world of depravity and sin. She was too young, too inexperienced, too naive and willing. I’d made a mistake in bringing her to Romerius. I’d made a mistake trying to have her be a part of my world. It was too dark, too sinister, too full of debauchery for her. She wasn’t ready for the life that I lived. And I knew that I couldn’t allow her to become even more entrenched in the games that we played.
Casper and Tarquin had known exactly what they were doing. I felt sorry for Tarquin. He was too young, and too easily influenced by his brother. He was a boy, trying to be a man, and he’d gotten caught up. It wasn’t his fault, though I didn’t consider that to be an excuse. I wouldn’t be able to forgive him. And I’d have to speak to Sebastian about Tarquin’s behavior. They’d have to cut ties. I was not going to allow anyone in my immediate circle be influenced by Casper and Violeta. Not at all. Not when I had so much to lose. And I knew that I couldn’t lose Lola. Not now. Not when everything inside of me was telling me that she was the one. The only problem was that I didn’t know if I wanted to have a ‘one’. What did that mean for my life? What did that mean for my plans? What good could I bring to Lola’s life? Maybe I’d brought enough trouble as it was. Maybe the best thing I could do would be to let her go. But everything in me rebelled at that thought. I unclenched my fists as I walked into my study, locked the door shut, and walked over to my desk. I stared at the invitation sitting on my planner and sat down in my leather chair. I picked it up and closed my eyes. I had a decision to make and I had no idea what to do. I opened my eyes and stared at the words, printed in black on the ivory linen paper. There was a gold line around the edge of the paper that I knew to be real gold. I had two days to make a decision. Two days that would change my life forever. Two days that would not only decide my fate, but Lola’s as well.
Chapter Three
Lola
My heart felt heavy as I sat in the bathtub full of salts and oils. I played with the bubbles and watched as my fingers swished the water back and forth. The movement was slightly comforting and it helped me to forget the situation I found myself in. Xavier was right, he was not the Prince Charming I had always dreamed of. He was not a man who could take me away from my mundane world and make everything in my life perfect. If anything, he needed someone to take him away from his world. It was so dark and unbelievable, so coarse and uncaring. And most of all, it was lonely. I always thought that rich people and royalty had to be worried about gold diggers and people using them for their money. I always thought that their biggest worries came from not knowing who they could trust among their poorer and non-noble friends. Now I knew differently. Now I knew that their other rich friends were even worse. The games they played with each other and others were almost inhumane. I thought back to Casper and Tarquin and their proposition for a threesome. How could they have done that, knowing or at least thinking I was engaged to their cousin? Didn't they have any shame? I could still see the desire in Casper's eyes and the challenge. He hadn't been embarrassed at all. He had no hesitation, either. If he could have taken me to his bed and had his way with me, he would have. He wouldn't have cared. I would have been his conquest and he wouldn't have cared if he'd hurt his cousin. Tarquin, I knew, had more hesitation. He'd looked unsure and also slightly guilty, but that was probably because he was younger.