“I get that you’re scared, and—”
“I’m terrified beyond words—freaking petrified!” I propped my elbows on the table, cradling my cheeks in my palms. “I can’t sleep at night without a sick need to call him or text him…beg him to come over and make it all go away. But I’m absolutely frightened that he’ll only hurt me again, and I can’t handle that. I’ve offered friendship, and I want to make that work if he sticks around after I give him what he really wants, but I’m not stupid enough to fall again.”
“Okay, just be careful.” She smiled gently, doing her best to be the loyal best friend I needed.
Finally, she seemed to understand. It wasn’t that I didn’t want Logan—I did, more than anything—I just couldn’t let go enough to risk another chance with him. I wasn’t sure I’d survive it, and I hated how weak it made me feel.
Chapter Seventeen
Best-Laid Plans
“Caleb!”
I heard rather than saw Oliver when he walked in. My head shot up, staring at the door where he stood, with Logan directly behind him.
My stomach tightened at the sight of him. His dark wool coat hung open, with his dark work suit underneath it. He looked good, but then again, he always did.
No. I needed to remain unaffected, no matter how much my brain replayed our last interaction—our first, but not last, rendezvous in bed.
“Hey, little buddy!” Caleb replied, bending down and holding up his hand for a high five.
“Are you going to go and say hi?” Hilary’s voice broke my stare.
I knew I shouldn’t, considering I’d been ignoring Logan’s texts since that night while I worked out my thoughts, but I didn’t want that to stop me from speaking to Oliver. Not to mention I needed to stick to the plan and get it over with.
“Yeah, a quick hello. I’ll be right back.”
As I walked over, smiling at how happy Oliver appeared, I stopped abruptly when I saw who entered behind Logan. Her head was down, placing her phone back in her purse, but I recognized her immediately: Natasha.
Slowly, I began to turn around, but it was too late. Logan saw me first and I couldn’t bring myself to look like a fool, so instead of turning back, I began to detour to the ladies’ room when Oliver called out, “Cassie!”
Damn it. Natasha being there forced my confidence out the window. I’d been trying to forget she even existed. I released a breath, ran my tongue over my dry lips, plastered a surprised smile on my face, then turned around.
“Hey! What are you up to?” I asked, strolling back over, eyes focused entirely on Oliver.
I could feel Logan’s piercing gaze boring into me. I had no doubt Natasha was staring as well, but I continued over, smiling at the young tot beaming as he wrapped his hand around the slender hand beside him. I followed it up the arm of his mother. My smile held firm, stinging my cheeks.
“This is my mom!” Oliver’s voice was proud, and full of genuine admiration for the woman. “This is Cassie!”
I nodded, taking her all in once again. The woman really was everything I would expect Logan to want. Her long legs rocked a pair of dark skinny jeans and she wore a pair of patent-leather knee-high boots with a black fitted jacket, an expensive scarf wrapped twice around her neck.
“Hi, it’s a pleasure to officially meet you, Cassie.” From the way she bit out my name, I knew we’d never be friends.
I noticed her glance from me to Logan and back again. It was then that I finally allowed myself to look over at him. He was watching with keen interest as I swallowed the lump in my throat.
“You too,” I replied as kindly as possible through my uncomfortable smile.
What else was I supposed to say? “Glad to see you’re back after abandoning your family?” Honestly, I wanted to lean forward and let her know what would happen if she broke Oliver’s fragile heart. The thought caused me to wince.
“So, Oliver tells me you’re a teacher. Sounds like an interesting job. All those kids running around.” She laughed once, and my dislike for her was cemented. It wasn’t fair to her, and it wasn’t like me, but my protectiveness for Oliver knew no bounds.
“Sorry, if you would excuse me for just a moment, I need to use the restroom.” I caught the knitted brow on Logan’s stern expression as I turned and ambled straight to the ladies’ room. I didn’t stop until I was in front of the small sink, hands gripping it on either side, face down, trying to collect my thoughts.
What was wrong with me? Was I always going to be this weak, now that I gave in just a little? No, soon enough this would be over.
Get it together!
I needed to prove to Logan, to myself, that I could hold my own and keep my heart protected after the war that withered it.
I’d tried to ignore her existence, even after I’d seen her leaving Logan’s house the day before. She was living with him, as far as I knew, and I couldn’t push past the worry that if she was living under the same roof as him, something might happen. They had a history, and it was obvious she wanted him. The fact that he allowed her to live there only helped me stick to my determination that he and I would never be a couple.
With a deep breath, I twisted on the cold water and splashed my hands in it. I ran it up my arms, cooling the heat flashes he’d set upon me. I wiped the wetness over my forehead, lost in how I was going to go back out there and play it cool. I felt antsy, my nerves skittering through my veins.
I sighed. Why did she have to be so beautiful?
“She’s nothing compared to you.”
I jumped, whipping around, splashing water on the floor in the process of turning to see Logan standing just inside the door.
Crap, did I say that out loud?
“What are you doing in here?” I gasped.
I looked around. Was I in the guys’ restroom? I cringed inwardly, my cheeks searing. My luck was always crap.
No urinals in sight—that was a good sign. I tilted my head just enough to sneak a quick peek under the few stalls for feet.
All alone. Phew.
The relieved feeling only lasted until I looked back at Logan and saw that intense look in his eyes—one that reminded me he’d slept with me, half naked, rubbing against him and looked forward to doing so again…soon.
This was it—the moment I needed him to play into my hand.
I took two long strides toward the door, but he blocked my path and, to my body’s uproar, reached back and twisted the lock.
“What are you doing?” I hissed, standing tall.
I needed to play hard to get or he’d see right through me, but his perfect five o’clock shadow and alluring lips were almost too much to endure.
“Unlock the door. Someone may need to come in! Someone, as in the woman living with you now.”
“I don’t care. And the only reason I haven’t kicked her out of my house is because I don’t want her using Oliver against me. I need to know why she came back, and I need to keep an eye on her when she’s around my son. But for the record, she’s sleeping in a guest room on the other side of the house. And nothing, I mean nothing, will ever happen between me and her again. It’s been over for years, Cassandra.”
“That’s none of my business.” I jutted out my chin, holding my own, protecting my heart swelling in my chest. “I’m leaving. Goodbye Logan.”