Chapter Twenty-seven
It was crazy, but the more horrified Heather was by his being in love with her, the more Zach realized his feelings weren’t going anywhere. She hadn’t tricked him into this. His falling for her had happened all on its own, despite the fact that love wasn’t supposed to be in his plans.
His chest clenched tight at the thought of leaving both Heather and the kids he couldn’t imagine not having with her now, behind too soon. But even though he knew he should be letting her go find some guy who could really give her forever, it turned out he was just as much of a selfish bastard as he’d always been.
Which was why even thoughts of how crushed his mother had been by his father’s sudden death couldn’t stop him from saying, “I changed my mind.”
He slid his hand into her hair the same way he always did when they were making love. Because that’s what it had always been, right from the start.
Not just sex, but love.
“You changed my mind.”
“No,” she protested in her beautiful, stubborn way. He wouldn’t want her any other way, even as she said, “You can’t change your mind about love when you don’t even believe in it, remember?”
“I never said I didn’t believe in love,” he clarified. “I just said I wasn’t looking for it. But I didn’t know you were coming into my life. I couldn’t have known.” He looked into eyes that were so beautiful, whether lit with laughter or hazy with passion. “I meant it when I said you were mine. From the first moment I set eyes on you, I knew it. You knew it, too, Heather. That the first time we met, the first time we touched, the first time we kissed, I was yours.”
She didn’t try to deny it this time, simply said, “I wasn’t looking for this. I don’t want this.”
Didn’t she see how strong she was? Strong enough to make better decisions than her mother ever could have? For the millionth time he wanted to tear her father apart for the way he’d hurt his beautiful daughter. She’d been innocent, pure like Emma once...until her father had destroyed her faith.
“I love you, Heather.”
Love for her had been there, inside of him, all along. Seeing Heather surrounded by his family, and then with Emma, and knowing how perfectly she fit in with everyone else he loved, had just made his feelings for her all the more undeniable.
Her beautiful face was full of so much emotion as she looked up at him, that his throat clogged just looking at her.
“How do you always do this to me?” she whispered.
Hope lit in him, warring with the dark knowledge that making her profess her love to him wasn’t fair. Not when he’d go and die on her too soon, just like his father had.
Shoving the darkness away as he had a thousand times before, he whispered back, “What do I do, Heather?”
Finally, she reached for him, putting her hand over his heart the same way she had their first night together. “You make me feel so much.”
She wasn’t running anymore, and that should have been good enough. But it wasn’t. He wanted to hear her say she loved him, too.
“How much?”
“Everything.”
Nothing could have stopped him from kissing her then, and as his mouth covered hers he realized he didn’t need her to say the words after all.
Because the love she felt for him was right there in her kiss.
* * *
The trip back to Zach’s house was a blur. Heather’s phone kept buzzing with reminders of meetings she needed to attend and voice mails from her assistant. Zach’s siblings texted and called to get the dirt on why the two of them had left his brother’s house so abruptly. Without even discussing it, it was clear that work, family—all of the usual things that made up their days—would have to wait.
Only the dogs couldn’t possibly be ignored, not when they needed to be fed again and taken on a walk to the park to run off some energy. Throughout, while Heather told Kate to cancel everything for the rest of the day, and she threw Atlas’s rope and watched Cuddles tackle it with her entire body, the only thing Heather could focus on was the way Zach never let go of her hand for one second.
And the fact that he loved her.
Love was a word that hadn’t meant anything to her since she was seventeen. She’d been certain it could never impact her again, not after so many years of hearing her father throw it around like sparkly confetti.
But when Zach said it, she’d felt the resonance of those four letters down so deep in her soul that her entire world shifted on its axis.
She’d tried for so long to pretend love didn’t matter.
It did.
She’d tried for so long to keep that part of her cold. Untouchable.
Zach had touched her, warmed her.
She’d embraced being alone.
Only to find a man without whose smiles, off-color jokes, and sensual whispers as she was coming apart in his arms, she’d be lost.
By the time they got back to the house and Atlas plopped down on his doggy bed with Cuddles lying across him the way she loved best, Heather felt like her insides were a volcano on the verge of exploding.
Her hand was still in his as they headed for the bedroom. Zach closed the door with a soft click that sounded like a bullet going off inside her head.
Feeling shaky, she had to reach for him, had to wind her arms around his waist and back, knowing he’d be strong. Solid.
She’d never let herself lean on anyone before.
Zach caressed her cheeks, his thumbs brushing over her mouth before his fingers moved into her hair, to the spot that felt just right whenever he held her there.