“They’re lovely people,” I say.
Raide turns to me just before he reaches the bathroom. He’s got his shirt bunched in his hands, ready to lift over his head. “Yeah, they are.”
Our eyes lock, and so much passes between us. He knows I want to ask, but what he doesn’t know is that I won’t do it. Not because I don’t want to know—I do—but because it’s none of my business. I’m never going to be anything to Raide. I can’t be. I care about him, I want to help him, but the cold hard facts are, I’m going to betray him in a big way, and he’s probably going to get locked up because of it.
That very thought has tears burning under my eyelids. Raide notices and drops his shirt, striding over to me. He wraps his big arms around me, crushing his body to mine and holding me close. “It was a long time ago, Grace. Don’t love her anymore. We dated, I cared once, but we wanted different things. She wanted a white-collar kind of man, and she struggled when Kelly was down and being difficult. She didn’t know how to handle her. I realized then that the love I felt for her wasn’t what I thought it was. I could never be the man she wanted. She pushed for me to go into professions that would put me high in the business world. That wasn’t me, so I broke it off. She’s a good girl, but she’s not the girl I was ever meant to spend my life with. When I got charged, she didn’t call me for weeks. I thought I meant more to her—I mean, we grew up together, and we’d been on good terms the last few years since we broke up. She admitted I wasn’t the best fit for her either but she didn’t have the guts to call off the engagement . She’ll always be like family now, but that’s it. She let me down. I thought she’d be there when I needed her, even if we weren’t together, but she wasn’t. I don’t go back when my trust is shattered.”
Oh. God.
I don’t go back when my trust is shattered.
I cry hard, but I let him go on thinking it’s over Mandy. Because if he knows what I’m really crying about, there’s a good chance I’ll be in Mandy’s place and he’ll never trust me again.
And if that happens, I’ll lose him forever.
Chapter Seventeen
Hot lips glide down and over my breasts. Raide is over me, his body hard, rippled, and big. His hands are slightly rough, but he knows how to use them without inflicting pain. He’s got two days’ growth, and it tickles my skin as he moves. He’s sliding down my body, slowly, agonizingly. He reaches my breasts again, and his tongue lashes out to flick my nipples. First one, then the other.
I arch up, and his hands go to my hips to push me back down. He wants it slow, he wants it meaningful, he wants to give me what I’m so afraid to take. His big body is warm, his skin heating mine in the most glorious way. His mouth is soft as it glides over my skin, going lower and lower until he’s between my legs. Gently, he parts them, and I let my knees drop to either side.
“Fuckin’ sweet,” he murmurs.
I can feel his hot breath over me, causing my clit to throb. I want him to hurry up, I want him to give me what I need. He’s so close, and I’m squirming. “Raide,” I beg.
He drops down farther and his lips close around the ache that feels like it’s already about to explode. I groan and thrust my hips up, only to have them pushed back down. He sucks my clit deep into his mouth, and my hands fist the bedsheets as he devours me. Inch by inch, he moves up and down my sex, tasting me, flicking his tongue, thrusting it deep inside. I arch and cry out his name as my orgasm nears.
“Baby,” he growls against my flesh. “Come.”
I do, with a ragged, desperate cry. My body jerks and I slap the bed beside me as I explode into his greedy mouth. He pulls away slowly and I can still feel the intense throbbing between my legs as he slides his body up and over mine. He reaches over, takes a condom, and moments later he’s sheathed and ready. His hand comes up to curl around my neck while his other hand guides his cock home.
He inches in little by little, stretching me, filling me. Bliss. When he’s deep, he lets out a puff of air and then drops his forehead to mine. He starts moving, driving his flesh in and out of mine. I lift my leg and wrap it around his hip, using my foot against his ass to push him in harder. He grunts and takes hold of my hips. “Hold on.”
He flips me over until I’m on my hands and knees. He lifts my hips and then he’s inside me again, this time I can feel him deep, hitting those delicate places and causing my body to explode with sensation. I cry out, gritting my teeth and clawing at the bedsheets as he starts fucking me the way I need him to. The distinct sound of skin slapping together can be heard over our ragged breathing and groaning. I tilt my hips and reach down to find my clit. I create fast, deep little circles until I’m exploding around him.
“Raide!” I scream. “Oh God.”
“Fuck. Me.”
He’s grunting hard, pounding hard, and after a few more intense thrusts, he stills and roars his release. It’s vocal, it’s loud, and it’s hot. His hips do a semi-jerk and then he collapses over me. I let my knees go and land flat on my belly. Raide comes down over my back, his hard, chiseled body flattening me to the bed.
He lifts himself up with his elbows and leans down to press a kiss to the back of my neck. “You’re fuckin’ sweet, lady,” he murmurs there.
“I can’t say the same about you.”
He chuckles and rolls us both, then he adjusts me until I’m tucked into his arms, face on his chest.
It’s silent a moment as we catch our breaths, then I decide to ask him a question I’ve wanted to know since the start. “Raide?”
“Hmmmm?”
“Why me?”
He turns and stares down at me. “What do you mean, why you?”
“What drew you to me enough for us to be here?”
He looks back up at the ceiling. “It was the first night I met you and you didn’t throw yourself at me.”
I giggle. “Shock and horror.”
He laughs. “Yeah, it surprised me. Most girls are flirting within seconds. You didn’t. You gave it to me and you held your own. Then when I saw you again, I knew you were trying to get my attention. I couldn’t help it, you intrigued me.”
“Did you really think I was stalking you?”
He snorts. “For a while, yeah. Till I saw you at the club with your cousin, and I realized you weren’t.”
My cousin. God. “But we never really spoke. I mean we ran into each other but—”
“Speakin’ of, why did we run into each other so much? Denver ain’t a small place.”
I swallow but say, “No, but we both either live or have friends on the same side of town. It would seem we frequent the same places. Sometimes people meet because they have similar interests. I like clubbing and I’m into guns. So are you. It does happen, you know? I’m sure there were plenty of places you didn’t see me.”
“Yeah,” he says. “You’re right about that.”
Thank heavens he dropped that one. Denver isn’t a small place; therefore, it is actually highly unlikely we would end up in so many of the same locations, at the same time, and so frequently. Even if we did live on the same side of town, it’s not logical.