"Don't worry about that princess just rest. I'll be back later to check on you" he interrupts me before I finish my sentence. Why is he avoiding my questions? He walks out like if nothing happen like if I had never seen the man. Nina gives me a small smile and turn to leave. Oh no she don't. "Nina," I grab her hand "what's going on?" She smiles and caresses my cheek "Nothing butterfly". I know there is something going on here I'm no fool. Lately I have notice that they are keeping things from me. I can read Nina and my dad like a book so I don't know why they even try hiding things from me.
"Don't lie to me Nina not you, you always tell me the truth" I beg. If there is anyone that I can trust to tell me what's going on it's her. "I'm afraid I'm not the one that has to tell you the truth this time" she pats my hand and I feel disappointed. "Nina please" I give her my sad puppies eyes that I have master since I was 5. That look has gotten me any thing I wanted from that day on. "Butterfly you know I love you as if you were my own. Trust me when I say let this one go" she squeezed my hand before leaving. It must be something huge if Nina is trying to keep it from me. If there is anything that
Nina or anyone should already know about me is that I never let anything go. Once there is a question in my mind I don't rest until I find the answers. I always find out what I want to know. You know I never really understood why they called my dad king. Now that I'm older I know for a fact that we aren't royalty. So why do they call him that? Maybe it's a nickname. I don't even think they know his real name. I reach under my bed for my laptop to Google "El Rey". When ever there is something I don't know I always Google it. As soon as I type in the nickname a million of headlines pops up. Seriously where the hell have I been? I click on the first link and start reading. I can't believe what I'm reading this is horrible. There is no way that this man "El Rey" can be my father. He is a monster, murder, kidnapper, a drug dealer. I click on the next link and on the next they get worst by the page. This can't be right. I search for a picture but nothing comes up. Apparently no one has ever seen this man's face and who ever has they end up missing. I need answers and the only one that can give them to me is my dad. My father can't be this man there is no way I need to hear him denied this. I jump off the bed almost tripping over my rug and run downstairs to his office. There is two armed men standing in front of his office and I walk towards them. I have no time to deal with these two right now I need to get to my dad. "Get out of my way I need to speak to my father" I rush pass them. One of them stretch his arm out for me not to pass "I am sorry Miss. Jane but he is busy right now". Busy? He is never busy for me. They should now better than that. I roll my eyes out of annoyance "I am his daughter and if you two want to keep your jobs then you'll let me through". I hate acting like a spoil brat but they leave me no other choice. He looks over to the other man asking for permission but he shakes his head "Sorry Miss. Jane I'll tell him you stop by". What? Are they serious right now? They aren't going to let me pass? I'm so mad I feel like breaking their necks. I might be only 5'2 and weight about 130 but I can sure kick some ass. Thanks to my father insisting me to take kickboxing classes I can kick some serious ass. My dad thinks that every girl should know how to protect themselves just in case they need to. I know I can't beat them but I can give them a hell of a run for their money. But all they are doing is their jobs and it wouldn't be fare to take out my frustration on them. "Fine just tell him to come see me as soon as he can" I spin around not giving them a chance to answer. Half way to my room my stomach growls now that I remember I didn't eat my dinner. I should go get something to eat as I walk to the kitchen I hear screaming and a noise that sounds like a chain saw. Is some one watching a horror movie? I love scary movies. Should I follow the noise or go make some thing to eat? You know how in every movie there is the dumb girl that follows the noise while you are yelling at her to walk the other way? Well that girl will be me. I follow the noise and it leads me to the backyard. Who would be watching a movie in the back yard? I peak through the glass door and what I see takes my breath away. "Please I am sorry it won't happen again I promise" the man cries. He is still alive but he is tied up to a tree. Poppy is standing to his right carrying a chainsaw. What in the world is going on? Am I in some kind of freaking nightmare. My heart is beating so hard and my eyes are starting to get fill with tears. I want to walk away but my feet are glue to the floor. What is going on with my mind and body today it seems like they can't get along. "You're right it won't happen again," he yanks back the string and the chainsaw roars to life. My body starts to shake. "See you in hell" Poppy smirks. He isn't going to do what I think he is. Is he? "No please don't I'm sorry" the man yells. Poppy runs the chainsaw across the man's neck ignoring him. I hear the man screaming for help and I cover my mouth with my shaky hands to keep me from joining him. My eyes fill up with tears as I watch how the man's head drops to the ground. Oh god I'm diffidently about to be sick any moment now. I can't believe what I just saw. Poppy turns his head to where I'm standing and I run to my room before he can see me. Oh god did he see me? If he did is he going to kill me? I close the door behind me and thrown my self in my bed. I bury my face into the pillow and let out the scream that has been dying to come out. My body starts to shake as I sob. My mind is on overdrive trying to understand what I have just saw. I keep replaying over and over again what just happen. I have never been so scare in my life all I want to do is hide under my covers. After what seems like a life time I finally get my self together. I need to stay strong if I am going to face my dad. Now more than ever I need to know the truth. There is a knock on my door and my soul jumps out of my body. I'm still shook from what I saw earlier. My father walks in the room "Princess I herd you wanted to talk to me" he is calmer than I have ever seen him. I grab my pillow and put it in front of me. I have to play with something to keep my nerves on check. Every time I'm nervous about something I always have to have something in my hands. "Sit dad" I nod to the chair. I need to find the right way to confront him. I can't even manage to look at him right now with out crying. My emotions are all over the place I'm mad, sad, confuse, scare, hurt, angry, all in one. I can't be sitting down right now I need to be moving. I stand and start to pace around trying to find a way to start this conversation it's not everyday you have to confront your drug dealer of a father. "Your going to make a hole in the carpet" he teased. "Okay" I pull a chair to sit next to him. I need to look at him straight in the eyes to make sure he won't lying to me. "I need you to tell me the truth no matter how bad it is I need to know" I say. He stares into my eyes "I promise". I know he is telling the truth. Her goes nothing I take in a big breath "What is your occupation?". I play with my hands trying to keep my eyes on him. He stayed quite for a few seconds debating if he should tell me the truth, that I all ready know, or to keep lying. The suspense is killing me every second feels like a minute and every minute feels like an hour. I don't know which one would hurt more him lying to me or him telling me the truth. "I am a drug lord" he finally spoke. The little hope I was holding on to just died. It's one thing to think you know some thing and a different thing to really know it. My heart hurts it feels like every time it pumps instead of sending blood it sends pain. I can't move, tears are falling down my face uncontrollably, I can't react. My whole world just came crushing down on me in matter of seconds. Everything that I thought about my childhood has been a lie. How could he do something like that to me? Maybe he should of just keep lying to me because the truth hurts like hell. "Jane baby listen to me" he reaches for my hand but I pull it away from him. I don't want him to touch me right now. I don't even know who this man in front of me is. "You're el-" I can't even finish my sentence. "Jane let's talk about this. I'll answer all your questions but you have to talk to me" he plead. I can hear the sadness in his voice but it doesn't do nothing for me. Now he wants to talk. He had all this time to tell me the truth but he didn't. He waited for me to find out on my own. "You want to talk about how you're a murder? A monster?" my voice comes out wobbly thanks to the crying. I can see how much my words hurt him but I don't care I want him to feel the same way I do. I want him to feel crush, hurt, and devastated. I don't want to be the only person in this room with her heartbroken. "No! Jane" he moves closer to me "I am none of that. I'm your father the same father that loves, cares, and adores you. The same father that you ran to every time you were scare. The same father who gave you everything you wanted. The same father that would give his life to protect you. Nothing has change I'm Jose Santana your father. El Rey is some one else that you will never meet". What in the world is he saying? He would give up his life to protect me but he just fail to do so. He didn't protect me from his lies. He didn't protect me from the only person who could hurt me himself. How can you be two different people I don't understand. I have no energy to keep fighting with him this is getting us no where. I'm not in the right state of mind to keep arguing with him. "Okay dad" I end up saying. He pulls me into a hug but I don't return it. I'm to numb to feel anything. My hands are glue to my side I can't move them. He gives me a kiss on the forehead "Te amo Jane". Does words cut me deep inside before they would make me feel happy and important but right now they hurt more than anything else. "I love you too dad" my voice sounds dead just like me. My dad gives me a squeeze and walks out of the room leaving me with my pain. Once he was out of my room I let go of everything that I was holding in. I cried for the life that I once had. I cried because everything has change life as I knew it was gone. I cried for my father and me. I cried for the man who lost his life. That was the start of my new life.