“Why did you cry, baby?”
Just thinking back on all he’d said made her want to cry all over again. At his look of alarm, she realized she had teared up.
“Oh, Jace,” she whispered. “You can’t imagine how much it meant to me that you’d actually be willing to change who you are, what makes you who you are, because you think it’s what I want. And that you showed me the heart of you. But you have to understand, I want you. All of you. I don’t want a watered-down version of Jace. I want you. Controlling, dominant, arrogant, caring, loving, protective . . .” She trailed off, her voice husky with emotion and clouded with tears. “Do you understand?” she whispered.
He crushed her to him, still firmly embedded in her body. She could feel every heartbeat. He trembled against her as his hands tangled in her hair. Then he pulled away just enough to lean his forehead into hers, their mouths precariously close and their gazes hooded, connected.
“Don’t know what I’d do if I hadn’t found you,” he said in a stark voice. “Kills me to even think about it. Don’t know what I’d do without you. That makes me crazy too.”
“Do you get it, Jace? Really get it? I want you. I want your dominance. I need it.”
He stroked his hand down her hair, smoothing the strands, the motion comforting.
“You got me, baby. All of me. I hope to hell you’re prepared for it. But you’re getting it. All of me. One hundred percent. But you have to promise me something.”
“What?” she whispered.
He kissed her first, a light smooching, warm and breathless. When he pulled his head back, his eyes were alight with satisfaction and contentment.
“Promise me that if it’s ever too much, if you’re ever overwhelmed, if I ever push too hard or too fast, that you’ll tell me. You have to tell me. I couldn’t live with myself if I knew what I was doing was scaring you or, God, hurting you. I never want to make you feel bad about what we do.”
She kissed him this time, savoring the feel of him, of being in his arms. This was real. He was real. She was shaken to her very core by the magnitude of what was happening here. He wanted her. Her.
“I promise,” she whispered against his lips.
Chapter twenty-three
Bethany waited, breathless with anticipation. Nervousness. Her stomach was full of butterflies. Jace would be home any minute. He’d texted her to let her know he was leaving the office. Nothing else. No instructions. Nothing about their plans for the evening. And in light of their heart-to-heart discussion the night before, she had a very good idea of how she wanted to be waiting for him when he arrived.
A signal of her acceptance. Her obedience. Her willingness and desire to submit to him. To forge ahead in the kind of relationship they both wanted. Not just what Jace wanted. It meant the world to her—it undid her that he’d been willing to suppress his own wants and needs if she displayed any hesitation over the parameters of the relationship he’d outlined.
And maybe that was a huge reason why she was so willing to accept without reservations the things he asked of her. Because he hadn’t demanded. He hadn’t given her an ultimatum. He’d told her how he wanted things but just as quickly let her know that if she wasn’t able or willing to commit to that lifestyle that he’d be the one to compromise and take whatever it was she felt comfortable offering.
Everything. She would give him everything. She wanted to make him happy because it’s what would make her happy.
She slipped out of her clothing and arranged it in a neat pile in one of the drawers he’d allocated for her use. He’d made noises about buying furniture for her that would be solely hers. But for now, using his space was fine. They still maintained separate residences even though more and more of her belongings had crept into his apartment.
She checked the time and knew he could be coming up the elevator even now. She quickened her pace to the living room and carefully knelt on the plush carpet in a position that afforded her a view of the elevator doors. She’d see him as soon as he stepped out, but more importantly, the very first thing he’d see when he entered the apartment would be her. Waiting. Submissive. Giving him what he most wanted from her.
The minutes ticked by with agonizing slowness. Quiet descended in the apartment and only her soft breathing could be heard. And then the sound of the elevator arriving. Her pulse quickened as the doors slid open and she stared ahead, eager to see his face, his reaction when he saw her.
He stepped inside, briefcase in hand. He locked on to her immediately and the briefcase slid from his grasp, hitting the floor with a soft thump.
“Baby,” he whispered.
Just one word but it conveyed a wealth of meaning. Surprise. Joy. Relief. Warmth flooded his eyes and they immediately went dark with desire. His entire face softened when before there’d been lines etched on his forehead and his jaw had been tense. He’d seemed distracted, as though he’d had a hectic day at work.
All of that melted away as he strode toward her, his focus solely on her, his gaze never once leaving her.
He stopped just in front of her, his hand delving into her hair, stroking through the strands before cupping her cheek and caressing the line of her jaw.
“How long have you waited like this?” he asked softly.
She smiled, leaning into his touch. She was starved for it. An entire day of waiting and wanting. Aching with need. Wanting to reaffirm what they’d already decided the night before. She wanted to reassure him, but perhaps she needed that reassurance even more.
“Not long. You texted when you left the office. I waited a bit and then came into the living room, here, so I could see you when you got off the elevator. So you could see me,” she finished quietly.
“Never seen a more beautiful sight when coming home from work, baby. Never thought I’d come home to this. To you. Like this. So soft and sweet. You make me forget everything else but you and me and the world we’ve created.”
“Good,” she said huskily. “I want that for you. You do so much for me. I want to do as much for you.”
He smiled down at her, his fingers rubbing lightly over her lips. “You do. You’ve made my entire day. Seeing you like this. I can’t even remember my crappy day or what happened at work. Don’t even give a damn. Because now I’m here with you and nothing else matters.”
“I’m yours to command,” she murmured. “Tell me what you want, Jace.”
He hesitated, standing there, his eyes expressive, but he remained silent, almost as if he were afraid to voice his thoughts. Then finally he spoke. Careful with his words.
“I know we talked about this last night, baby. I know you agreed. I know I laid it out. But I don’t want to rush into this. I want to give you time to adjust to my expectations. I want you to be sure that this is what you want. The very last thing I want is to overwhelm you. I want to take things slow. Work up and take it a step at a time. I don’t doubt you. Don’t want you to think that. I’m going to be careful with you because I care about you. I care about us. And I want us to last.”
Her heart went soft, the ache intensifying. A knot formed in her throat and it was hard to speak around the growing emotion. “Don’t you know, Jace? When you say things like that it only makes me want to please you even more. We don’t have to pull out all the stops the first day of this new relationship. But I want to show you what I can be. What I want to be. For you. But not just for you. For me too. I want this. You want this. We want this. So tell me how to please you. Give me the words and let’s begin something new and special.”
“I want to fuck you,” he said bluntly. “Right here in the living room. I want you to suck my dick with you on your knees looking so damn sweet and beautiful, your eyes glowing and soft. And then I want to bend you over the couch, tie your hands behind your back and fuck you long and hard. And then when I’ve come, I want to lay you out and make love to you like you’ve never been loved. I want to eat that pussy and I want to suck your tits until you’re ready to come out of your skin.”
“Is that all?” she teased.
He grinned, some of the worry easing from his expression. “It’s all for now. There’s a whole hell of a lot more I want to do to you—will do to you. But we’ve got all the time in the world and we don’t have to do it all on the first day. We’ll take it slow and when I’m sure you’re with me all the way, we’ll get there, baby. No doubt about that. I’m going to crop that ass, tie you up and fuck you in every conceivable manner a man can fuck a woman. But for now, I just want those sweet lips around my dick and then I’m going to dive into that warm, tight pussy.”
She shivered, her clit throbbing until she squirmed to alleviate the ache.
He gave her a knowing smile and then reached for the fly of his pants. He unfastened the button and then lowered the zipper, the rasp sharp in her ears. He pulled his cock out, stroking it to hardness with firm pulls, and then he tilted her chin up with his other hand.
“Open your mouth, baby. Take me inside and suck me off. Take me to the edge, but I’m not going to come until I’m balls deep inside your pussy and you’re bent over the arm of the couch, ass perched high in the air with your hands tied behind your back. That’s when I’m going to pump you so full of my cum that it’ll run down your legs and I’m going to leave you that way just so I can stand back and look at you, knowing you’re mine and that I just took what I own.”
She closed her eyes as he slid inside her mouth, the erotic images he’d described bombarding her mind. His hands were gentle as he palmed her face, but his thrusts were not. It was an arresting contradiction, his touch versus the force with which he fucked her mouth.
“Now this is the way a man likes to come home,” he whispered. “His woman waiting on her knees, wanting only to pleasure him. Waiting for his command. Accepting whatever it is he tells her to do. Fuck me, it doesn’t get any goddamn better than this, baby.”
She smiled around his cock, satisfaction gripping her, squeezing her heart until she was breathless. She loved that she affected him this way. That he was so wild for her and that she pleased him as no other woman had.
He thrust hard and then slowed, sliding more gently over her tongue, rubbing the tip over her lips before plunging back inside the wetness of her mouth.
“So beautiful,” he murmured. “And mine. Fucking mine. You belong to me. Only me. No one else will ever have this, what I have, you on your knees, waiting for me to walk out of that elevator. If other men only knew what I had, they’d be jealous sons of bitches. You’re a woman worth fighting for, Bethany. Men would kill to possess what I own, even for an hour.”
His words sank deep and she soaked them up, holding them in the deepest part of her soul. Her chest tightened and her throat knotted, making it hard for her to take his length.
He frowned and then withdrew, leaving only the tip resting on her bottom lip. “You okay?”
She nodded, unable to formulate a coherent response. How could she when she was perilously close to tears? Happy tears. She was overwhelmed and not in a bad way. The very best way. Overcome. She had no idea what to say, how to respond. She could only show him what those words meant to her.
Leaning forward, she took the initiative and sucked him deep but then immediately glanced up, gauging his reaction, to see if her boldness had angered him. He feathered a hand over her cheek and smiled tenderly, almost as if he could read her every thought and knew just how affected she was by all he’d said.
Holding her head in place, he thrust one more time, deeper, pushing to the back of her throat until it convulsed around him. He let out a groan and then released her, pulling his cock from her mouth. Then he reached down with both hands and curled them around hers, lacing their fingers together. He pulled her carefully to her feet and remained in that one spot for a long moment while he waited to ensure she had her footing.
“To the couch,” he said, his command stronger, holding more of an edge than before. “I want you to lean over the arm, belly down, forehead touching the cushion. Ass in the air and your feet don’t touch the floor.”
She swallowed and did as he’d dictated, positioning herself accordingly. He moved away, his footsteps retreating into the bedroom while she waited eagerly for him to return. When he came back, he carried a length of silken rope. Her arms were already twisted behind her, her hands resting at the small of her back.
He gathered her wrists in his hands and then, holding them firm with one hand, he began to coil the rope around them with the other. Though the rope was soft and nonabrasive, he tied it tight, binding her effectively so she couldn’t move her hands.
“Seeing you this way . . . Baby, I don’t even have words. It’s a sight I’ll dream about at night when you’re in my arms, sleeping next to me.”