“Yeah, you did great. I think…” He shook his head. “I think we can call that our success for today.”
I didn’t need to be told twice. I scurried up the ladder and onto the pool deck, wrapping myself in the towel. “So when’s our next session, coach?”
He pulled himself up, water slipping down the lines of his muscles. Breathe. “I’m working out of town for a few weeks, but I’ll call you when I get home?”
Right. I forgot that’s why he couldn’t start the library project yet. “No problem.”
He toweled off his hair and wrapped the cloth around his shoulders like one of those beach models. Mr. California, indeed. “Meet you out front?”
I nodded, retreated to the locker room, and pulled out my cell phone to connect with my real life. The phone rang as I tugged the wet suit down my body with a sucking sound.
“Hey, honey, I’m heading over to your place.”
Will’s voice soothed the unsettled feeling in my heart. “Sounds great. I’m finishing my lesson and then I’ll be home.”
“Love you.”
I paused, wondering what that really meant for the first time in my life. This was love, right? The steady, easy, solid feeling in my heart? Burning was a ridiculous notion. Who would sign up for that kind of insanity?
I couldn’t afford anything like fire anywhere near my heart.
“Lee-Lee?”
I cringed at the name. “Love you, too. Be home soon.”
I dressed and convinced myself to stop being silly. Love was what my parents had, what gave a foundation to a home. It was sturdy and dependable, not wild or untamed—that was ludicrous. I clicked the lights off and locked the door behind me, pocketing the key.
The sky had gone dark, and the stars dimly winked above me. My hair dripped down my back, and I gave it a squeeze, trying to wring the last of the water out of it.
Jagger leaned against Lucy, and I forced Will foremost in my mind. “Thanks for waiting on me.”
That smile nearly sent me to my knees. “Yeah, well, it would be a shame to go to all this work to keep you alive near the water just to have you killed by a roaming alligator.”
“He’s harmless, you know.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “He’s a roving menace.”
“George only roves his little pond, scaredy-cat.” I pressed my key fob, unlocking my car, and Jagger closed the distance before I could, opening my door. “Thank you, sir.” I slid behind the wheel, tossing my bag on the seat next to me.
He leaned in between the frame and the door. “One more question?”
“Yes.” I leaned back, all too aware of how close he stood.
“Who is Peyton?” I felt the blood rush from my face. “You had trouble saying that name.”
My fingers bit into my steering wheel, my nails impressing the leather. Three heartbeats passed before I dragged my gaze to meet his. No lies, we promised. But to tell him? To dig into a wound that barely felt scabbed over?
If there had been annoyance at my refusal, or even acceptance, I could have closed the door, both on him and the answer. But he stood there, looking at me with eyes that saw way too much and not nearly enough, patiently waiting.
“She was my older sister. My only sister.” The words didn’t hurt as they slipped free; instead they seemed to dissolve some weight I’d been carrying.
He gave me a sad smile. “Thank you for telling me. Good night.” He shut my door and was at his car before I unrolled the window.
“Jagger?”
He turned, Lucy’s door opened. “Yeah?”
We walked a fine line between borderline proper and absolutely not. I stuck my big toe across it, reveling in the honesty he drew out of me. “I’m going to miss you.”
He looked at me with a gaze so intense that I forgot to breathe. “Yeah, me, too.” He climbed into Lucy and leaned out to grab the door. “You know how that feels, right, missing someone?”
“Sure.” I’d missed Will when he’d been at West Point this last year. It was sweet longing to be near him, to talk to him and hear his voice.
“It kind of feels like burning.”
Chapter Eight
Jagger
There’s never been a day where I didn’t crave it from you—approval. But now, I could give a flying fuck what you think of me.
“Man, how much are you planning on eating?” Josh asked as I shoved another piece of Mellow Mushroom pizza down.
I swallowed. “Shut your face. I’m fucking starving.”
He laughed. “I know it was a long three weeks, but you were starving on the last pizza. This is overkill, and we have PT in the morning.”
I groaned. I still felt like warmed-over dog shit, but three weeks of SERE training would do that. I lifted my shirt, tensing my abs. “I think I can pass a PT test.”
“Put that away, you’re turning me on,” he joked, sending a text message.
“You get ahold of Ember yet?”
He held his finger up while he downed another bottle of Gatorade. Dehydrated didn’t quite describe us well enough. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Yeah. I’m headed up this afternoon after formation.”
“All weekend with Masters. Maybe we can sit around in silence.”
“He’s not that bad.”
“The guy refuses to talk about himself.”
Josh cracked a smile. “Well, you like to talk about yourself enough for the both of you.” He started toward his room, pulling another bottle out of the fridge on the way. “Hey, did I tell you I found a pickup game?”