"You're telling me! No news flash there, but I'm not sure 'little girl' is the appropriate term. She certainly is exceptional."
"I understand she confides in you and your conversations brought to light this most unfortunate business about her mother's death. She and her father should be grateful to you."
I beamed. "Thank you. I'd like to think Karen and I are developing a very special relationship."
"Yes. She told me. Apparently the two of you share secrets." What had Karen told him? Was he showing concern? I felt myself growing defensive.
"Our mutual honesty agreement squeezed out the suicide business she was hiding."
He held up a restraining hand. "I'm not faulting your . . . pact. I'm cautioning you, that's all. Karen is a very fragile child who has gone through enough to destroy most adults. We don't want to dismiss how remarkable she is, but don't lose sight of her fragility, or her age."
"What are you saying, Doctor?"
"I'm sensing that in her own way she loves you but refuses to admit it. She lost a mother; I'll try to learn the details of that relationship in our future sessions but right now, the jury remains out on whether or not she'll allow herself to love you."
"It's not for lack of trying on my part." I had to look away to stop myself from tearing up; the last thing I wanted to do in front of this guy.
"I'm just saying, Sarah Jeanne; don't try too hard. She's testing you and she'll continue to test you further until she's able to convince herself of your worthiness."
"I don't disagree, Dr. Mason, but she is a child, albeit a remarkable one."
"Don't forget the child part of the description."
We settled on Wednesday afternoon sessions with my appointment at two o'clock and Karen's after school. The doctor's office was walking distance from home, school and the toy store. We would waste no time getting started. The first formal sessions for each of us would occur in two days.
I left the meeting feeling less comfortable than after the first session. Was this guy trying an end-around between my daughter and me?
I summed up my conversation with the doctor to Paul, and later Karen and Paul together. I didn't mention the doctor's implied concerns about 'honesty' conversations between Karen and me. There was a consensus among the three of us that we were on the right track. Paul was especially pleased with the outcome of the day's sessions. I sensed Karen failed to understand the importance of the visits, but if it pleased us, she was willing to go along.