“No, you didn’t,” I reply and wink at Adam, whose face looks shell-shocked.
“You’re five,” he says.
“And a half,” Hailey replies haughtily.
“Who is this boy?” I ask, enjoying the utter surprise coming from Adam.
“Buster.”
“Buster?” I ask. “His name is Buster?”
“Yep,” she smiles and takes a bite of her pizza. “And he’s the tallest boy in my class.”
“In your kindergarten class,” Adam clarifies, making me laugh into my napkin.
“He’s supposed to be in the first grade, but he had to take ’garten again,” Hailey says as if it’s no big deal.
Oh God.
“And he’s tall.”
“What is he like?” I ask.
“I don’t know.” Hailey shrugs. “He’s tall.”
“Have you ever actually talked to him?”
“No.”
I nod, smiling at Adam, who has calmed with the news that my five-year-old isn’t necessarily attending the prom with this kid.
“His friend told my friend Lisa that he wants to be my boyfriend, and I told her to tell him okay.”
“I see.”
“But I’ll probably dump him,” she says.
“Why?” Adam asks, thoroughly intrigued now with the soap opera that is my child’s love life.
“Because he wore a green shirt today.”
“So?”
She stares at him for a minute, blinking. “Green is ugly.”
“And there it is,” Adam says to me. “I’ve just been schooled on dating by a kid.”
“Don’t wear green,” I reply with a laugh. “That would be risky around here.”
“No more green,” he agrees and smiles at Hailey. “What about blue?”
“Blue is okay for boys. But not girls.”
“Good to know.”
“She’s a dating and fashion expert,” I inform him. “She’s basically five going on thirty.”
“I see that,” he says, laughing, and I can’t stop looking at him. He’s a big man, broad and tall, but his face is kind, and he’s gentle with both Hailey and me.
Until I don’t want him to be gentle, and then he seems to know just how to touch then too.
He’s dangerous for my libido and my heart. Especially since he doesn’t do forever.
I’d do well to remember that.
“You okay?” he asks, shaking me out of my thoughts.
“Great.” I clear my throat. “I think it’s time for bath and bed.”
“I don’t need a bath,” Hailey says with a smile. “I took one last night.”
“Why do kids try so hard to avoid bath time?” I ask the room at large. “Trust me. You need a bath.”
Hailey grumbles, but I stand firm. “We will only be a little while. Do you want to stay?”
“I’m staying,” he says, catching my wrist in his hand and pulling me into his lap, kissing me soundly right in front of my daughter, who giggles with delight. “I want to make out with you on the couch after a certain someone is asleep,” he whispers in my ear.
“Good plan,” I whisper back and usher Hailey into the bathroom. Once she’s washed clean and in fresh pajamas, I hug her close and breathe her in. There’s still a touch of her sweet baby smell left, and I want to savor it for every minute I still have it.
She’s growing way too fast.
“Shall we read you a story?” I ask.
“I want Adam to read it,” she replies. “Please?”
“Go ask him,” I reply and watch her run out of the bathroom. I’m cleaning up the mess from bath time when they walk past toward her bedroom.
“I’ll be out soon,” Adam says.
“Three stories!” Hailey exclaims.
“One story,” I reply and turn to Adam. “Stand firm on that. Otherwise, she’ll take advantage of you every chance she gets. Trust me.”
“Got it.” He winks and lets Hailey lead him away, her small hand tucked in his.
With Becca gone, and Adam reading to Hailey, that gives me approximately fifteen minutes to myself. I don’t remember the last time that happened, and frankly, I don’t know what to do with myself.
I sit on the couch and turn on the TV, but am at a loss as to what to watch. So I switch it off again and check my phone for e-mails and then my social media.
I don’t know how I feel about Adam joining in on the everyday routine. I’ve been a single mom for a long time, taking care of everything on my own. And I’ve done a good job of it. I know that. Sharing it with someone new is…unsettling. Sharing my daughter with him is new.
Do I want this? Do I want Adam to walk into my life and merge into our lane of traffic? Because that’s exactly what it feels like. That he’s just effortlessly merged into our lane of traffic.
Finally, I stand and walk to Hailey’s bedroom, and lean on the doorway watching. Hailey is tucked under the covers, but she’s sprawled across Adam’s chest, watching the pages of Beauty and the Beast as Adam reads them. His voice rises and falls with the rhythm of the book, and to my surprise, he changes the pitch of his voice with each character, acting out the book perfectly. Hailey laughs, then sighs, watching Adam’s face now as he reads, and I can see it all over her sweet, little face.
She’s falling in love with him.
And if the truth be told, I think I am too.
Do I want this? As I watch this confirmed bachelor with my little girl, everything inside me says yes.