He stroked her hair from her face. “What’s wrong, Reagan?”

“I’m not sure if I’m ready for this.”

His heart sank. “Our relationship?”

Her eyes widened and she shifted closer. “No, not that. Is that what you thought was bothering me?”

Now she stroked his hair from his face.

“I wasn’t sure,” he said. “You haven’t talked to me since you stormed offstage.”

“I haven’t?” She hugged him. “I’m sorry. I guess after I unloaded on Ethan, I didn’t have much else to say.”

“Ethan? You talked to him about it?”

“Yeah. I called him earlier.”

“So you go to Ethan with your problems instead of me?”

“I’ve known Ethan a lot longer than I’ve known you, Trey. Depending on him is a habit, I guess. I can unload on you for the next forty-five minutes if you really want me to.”

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He cringed. “How about you give me a summary?”

She stared at him for a long moment. “I’m not sure if I can take too many more shoes to the face,” she said. “I know I’ll have to win the fans over, but when I was up there I felt… I don’t know. Not good enough.”

“I never feel good enough. You sort of get used to it after a while. Why do you think Brian gets so worked up before a show?”

“Brian does?”

“I guess it’s not as obvious with his comings and goings recently. He turns this odd shade of green and starts twitching uncontrollably. He gets a horrible case of stage fright every time we perform.”

“Why would he be nervous? He’s phenomenal.”

Trey kissed the tip of her nose. “So are you.”

She laughed. “You have to say that. You’re my boyfriend.”

“The crowd was stunned by your appearance, but you missed all the cheering they did for you after you ran off.”

“They cheered for me?”

“Yeah, of course they did. You were awesome.”

“Then why did they throw shoes at me?”

He kissed her forehead where a light bruise had formed. “They was a she. One person. Not everyone. And she was escorted from the stadium.” And Trey actually knew that she. He’d texted her three hours before the show to tell her that he would not be available for her entertainment that night. He wondered if Reagan needed to hear that. Maybe it would make things easier for her. Or maybe it would make her angry with him. Only one way to find out. “I think she was more jealous that you were with me than anything.”

“You knew her?”

Trey cringed. “She’s a regular hook-up. Or was. I told her otherwise earlier today.”

“So she didn’t bean me with a shoe because I sucked. She beaned me with a shoe because you dumped her?”

“I think so.”

Reagan released a long sigh. “Thank God. Wait. Did you tell her I was your girlfriend?”

“No, but she saw us play together. The way I was feeling when we played that solo had to be expressed all over my face.”

She smiled. “That was amazing, wasn’t it?”

He nodded. “Nothing like it.” Except playing with Brian. He sighed inwardly. Would he ever stop comparing her to Brian? She was so wonderful and he cared about her so much. Maybe it was a compliment to continually measure her against the only other person he’d ever loved, but it wasn’t fair to her. Even if she did keep measuring up to his idea of perfect. Well, perfect except for that lack of a penis thing, but there wasn’t anything to be done about that. “Feel better now?” he asked. Her body language had shifted from guarded to relaxed, but he wanted to hear her say it.

She nodded. “Yeah, but I do recall someone owing me a session with a talented tongue.”

He drew her against him and kissed her. “That I do, baby. That I do.”

Chapter 18

Usually the band had a huge party after their last show of a tour, but Brian was in a hurry to get home to his wife and baby, Sed was ready to start making babies of his own, and Jace looked like he was going to bust out of his skin at any moment. Besides, they were going back out on a new tour in eight days. It wasn’t as if they were going off tour for long. Reagan sat on the sofa with her electric guitar, practicing fingerings for Exodus End songs. She knew them all by heart, but as the day that she would debut as their rhythm guitarist drew near, her anxiety grew exponentially. If she hadn’t had Trey’s constant reassurance, she’d have been lost.

Trey was banging around in the cabinets in the kitchenette, growing more frantic by the moment. After checking each one at least twice, he made his way to the front of the bus. “We have to stop,” he told Sed, who was currently driving the bus. “I’m all out of suckers.”

“Trey, it’s two a.m. and we’re in the middle of nowhere. Even if I was willing to stop, and I’m not, there isn’t a cherry sucker for a hundred miles.”

“I need one. Now.”

“You haven’t smoked for almost two years now. I’d think you’d be over it by now,” Sed said.

“Sweetie, I think I have one in my purse,” Reagan said.

He turned to look at her as if she was an angel descended from the heavens. He retrieved her purse from the counter and dropped it beside her.

“You used to smoke?” Reagan asked.

“Yeah, I had to give it up because of my mother.”

Reagan lifted her eyebrows at him. “Your mother?”

“She saw me smoking in some music video of ours and called me every hour of every day harping on me until I quit,” he said.

Reagan rummaged around in her purse for the sucker she knew was in there somewhere.

“And if he refused to answer, she’d call Brian,” Sed said. “And if Brian refused to answer, she’d call me. And if I refused to answer, she’d call Eric. One time she called our manager.”

“She’s a bit persistent,” Trey said.

Reagan laughed and tugged a sucker from the bottom of her purse. “So you traded one vice for another?” A folded up piece of paper fell into her lap when she lifted the sucker to Trey.

“Pretty much. Mom doesn’t much care if I suck on suckers all day.”

“Did the talent with your tongue come before or after you started with the suckers?” Reagan asked him.

He wriggled his tongue at her, unwrapped his sucker, and stuck it in his mouth. “I’ve always had an oral fixation.”




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