Her words hit me like a punch to the stomach. I gasped, stepping back, the badly hidden tears behind my eyelids leaking out. ‘Lily!’
‘I’m sorry for what’s happened to you. I know a lot of it isn’t your fault, but you did have a choice; you can’t have gone hurtling towards all of this without being able to back out.’ She began to step away, tears now seeping from her eyes. ‘You’re going to give up being human for that Prince guy, so let’s face it, Violet. You’re more of a Varn than you are a Lee now.’
From behind her, Eaglen emerged, my father not far behind, as two unmarked cars with tinted windows pulled up.
‘My Lady,’ Eaglen called out to me, bowing and getting into the front seat of the car that was furthest away. Lily walked around to the back seat, pausing and looking at me with tears streaming down her face before she ducked inside. Without even looking up, my father got into the other back seat of the same car as his two men were pushed into the car behind. The door slammed on my last glimpse of him as his human daughter and without any hesitation, they pulled away.
Nobody watched them leave except me. My gaze followed the cars as they weaved along the gravel driveway, passing one of the gardeners who swept the fallen autumn leaves into a pile; then around the one edge of the forest until they delved into the cover of the trees, disappearing from view.
I sank against the banister, falling into the puddle my wet shirt had created and, from far up the hill, I heard the crackling of a fire as the beacon at Varns’ Point was lit once more, filling the air with the stench of burning.
SIXTY-THREE
Violet
The sun was just beginning to set when Kaspar returned. The Thames Estuary glistened under the fading rays, becoming a glaring orange sheet. Just above that, a thin strip of puffy violet clouds hovered, marking the divide between sea and sky.
I knew that dwelling on the past made the future seem bleaker, but I couldn’t help but think back to the time when I would never have considered standing here, time running out as the falling sun marked my minutes left as a human.
I felt sick just thinking about it. I had already rushed to the bathroom twice that afternoon and despite not eating anything since the apple, my stomach twisted and knotted, threatening to throw up what little was left in my gut.
‘I prefer you in the rain,’ Kaspar muttered in my ear, rubbing my shoulders in slow circles. The continuous motion helped to ease the tension in my muscles, so rigid and stiff that my fingers could not loosen themselves from where they gripped the stone banisters of Kaspar’s balcony. ‘Don’t worry,’ he continued. ‘It will all be over before you know it.’
I nodded, unable to speak because I didn’t trust myself to open my mouth in case my stomach betrayed me.
‘Violet, it will be dark soon.’ I nodded and didn’t move. He tried to tug a little on my arm, but my knees just wouldn’t bend so that I could take a step. However, it was enough for him to be able to prise my fingers away from the stone and half-carry me towards the door to his room.
He walked over to his bedside table, picking up a red velvet cloth and bringing it over to me. It remained rigid as he placed it flat in his palm, unfolding the corners of the cloth to reveal a small, ornamental dagger, encrusted with emeralds along the spine of the handle. The blade itself was wafer thin and looked horrifyingly sharp.
I must have seemed alarmed, because he pulled a reassuring smile. ‘Diamond-encrusted blade. It’s for me to cut a wound on my wrist with.’ He frowned. ‘It will give a clean cut, which will make it easier for you to drink from.’
‘Right,’ I breathed, suddenly feeling queasy.
He tugged at his bottom lip with a fang, looking me up and down. ‘You don’t have to do this, you know. Just say the word and we’ll forget it.’
‘No. I’ll do it.’ I tried to sound defiant, but it came out as more of a squeak. Lines appeared across his brow and he placed the knife aside, taking one of my hands in his own.
‘Violet, I want you to know something. My blood might give you eternity, but I can’t save you from the pain of living forever. As far as I’m concerned, you’re worth living all those millennia for, but when people go their separate ways or pass away, going on is as horrendous as dying. Do you understand what I mean?’
I nodded, although the mounting dread in my chest threatened to squeeze all the air out of my lungs. He lowered his eyes, picking up the knife again and wiping it clean with the cloth.
‘Then don’t worry about it. It won’t trouble you for a long time yet.’
He clenched his free hand, bringing the knife to the inner part of his wrist, tracing a vein. Without so much as a wince, he dragged the blade across his skin, drawing blood from a long, deep wound.
I knew we had to act fast: he would heal quickly and if we didn’t do it soon, I would lose my nerve. So I pushed my arm into his grasp and he pulled it up to his lips, inhaling the scent of my blood beneath my skin. Kissing my balled fist, a smirk curled the corners of his mouth as he unfurled my fingers.
Unable to watch, I looked away and stared at the portrait of the Queen – watching us, I was sure, as oil and in spirit – as he bit down. I gasped, gritting my teeth to try and stop tears from escaping. It wasn’t as painful as when he had bitten my neck, but it still sent a shudder right through my body. He felt it and paused, lapping at the blood that flecked his bottom lip.
‘Violet, are you truly sure about this?’
I nodded. ‘I don’t have any choice.’
He raised my wrist to his lips again as I took his hand in mine, bringing his blood to my own quivering lips, swallowing back a whimper. But just before he began to drink, he paused, breaking out into his characteristic smirk.
‘I love you, Girly,’ he said.
‘And I love you, leech,’ I replied.