Inside her chest, her heartbeat changed, shifting to a pulse that was deeper, stronger, as if they'd somehow, in that moment of connection, become one. Her heart was no longer hers alone.
And she knew.
She'd fallen in love with Lyon.
* * *
Chapter Twelve
Lyon dropped Kara's hands and rose, feeling suddenly strange. Off-balance. His chest heavy, like he wasn't sure he remembered how to breathe. Was this another problem due to the lack of radiance? Or something else? Something caused by the woman herself?
The moment he pulled away, Kara's gaze fled to the falls. She stared out at them now, her hair a golden glow around her. The pulse throbbing in her neck.
What just happened? She'd smiled, and he'd fallen. He'd felt as if his feet had been jerked right out from under him. As if his equilibrium had been suddenly stripped away.
Goddess, but she was a temptation he couldn't afford. What was he thinking bringing her out here alone? He should have at least brought one of the others with them. Hawke could have prepped her while he kept watch. Or Vhyper. He should have invited her mate. He could have watched to make sure he didn't go feral. But the thought of that snake's hands on her sent hot jealousy rushing through his bloodstream.
Damn, but he needed to get control.
Kara turned back to Lyon, feeling off-kilter. As if the sands had shifted beneath her feet. She loved him.
How screwed up was that?
She took a deep breath and struggled to settle down. What she felt for Lyon wasn't going to matter so long as he was convinced she had to marry Vhyper. Maybe there was a loophole somewhere. Dear God, there had to be a loophole somewhere.
Maybe for now, she simply needed to learn alt she could about this world and her role in it.
She looked at Lyon, watching the wind toss his thick hair as he watched her in return with enigmatic amber eyes.
"What's the purpose of this energy pull?" She linked her fingers together in front of her. "What can I do with it?"
"You have to pull the power in order to ascend."
"You keep using the word ascend. I'm not actually going anywhere am I?"
He turned away. "No, You'll call the power from the Earth, and we'll all share it."
"How?"
"There's nothing for you to fear."
Warning bells clanged in her head and she stood, staring at his strong profile.
"Oh, no you don't. The moment you tell me I shouldn't be afraid, I know I'd better start worrying. Spill it, Lyon. All of it."
"Later." His tone hardened with impatience. "You need to get back to work." But he wasn't meeting her gaze. She'd been down this path before and wasn't going there again.
"No way. You sent me into the Pairing without telling me I was getting a husband, and look how well that turned out. Don't you dare send me into another one unprepared."
His jaw clenched, and he remained mute.
Kara crossed her arms over her chest. "In case you hadn't noticed, this is not the way to calm my fears."
He glanced at her with a scowl. "You aren't going to like it."
"Tell me anyway. It's better if I'm prepared."
With a huff of frustration, he turned away and began pacing with tight agitation. "When the Ascension is over, you'll feel a rush of power like nothing you've ever experienced. We all will. And we'll be able to shift again."
"That's nice. Tell me the rest, Lyon."
He looked out over the river, then back at the path. Anywhere but her. Finally, his jaw set, and he met her gaze.
"The Ascension requires blood. And sex."
Kara's eyes widened as the word did a strange number on her pulse. "Sex? During the ritual?"
Lyon shrugged. "It's necessary. Only at the moment of sexual release is the body and mind fully opened. It's only at that moment that you'll be able to raise the powers of the Earth and make them yours."
She thought of the Pairing. How they'd been prepared to make her kiss them all. Them all.
"Sex with whom? How many times?"
"For goddess sake, Kara, we're not complete animals. One time. With your mate."
"With Vhyper." She went cold, imagining him forcing himself on her, into her, with the others there. With Lyon there. "I'm not having sex in front of eight men!"
"The rest of us won't watch."
"But you'll be there?"
"Of course. We have to be touching you when you raise the Earth's power in order to be renewed ourselves."
"Touching me?" Dear God, this was getting worse by the second. "Touching me where?"
"You'll be clothed, Kara," Lyon replied, his voice tight with strained patience. "In a ritual gown. Standing. We'll be kneeling, touching your feet or calves, heads bowed. Not watching. Your mate will enter you from behind."
Kara groaned. "You're making this up." They'd be right there, touching her legs, listening to every groan, every slap of flesh on flesh while she was mounted like some kind of… some kind of… animal. Her scalp crawled at the thought of Vhyper's hands on her, his penis pushing against her, forcing itself inside her tight dryness, because she would never be ready for him. Never.
Lyon threw up his hands in frustration. "This is why I didn't want to tell you. I knew you wouldn't take it well."
"It's like some kind of frat-boy fantasy! You'll hear everything!"
Lyon scowled. "You wouldn't find it barbaric if you'd been raised Therian. We're shape-shifters, Kara. Part animal. Not a bunch of computer salesmen."
She flung her hands outward, mirroring his own frustration, and whirled away from him. "I can't believe this."
"Don't go anywhere."
She tossed him a heated glare and turned her back on him as she looked out over the river.
Lyon wished he could take back his words. He shouldn't have told her about the sexual nature of the Ascension, not this soon. She was far too human-minded for such truth. At the very least, he should have waited until after they were through with their work today.
They'd barely started, and already Kara stood at the far end of the stone, silhouetted against the brooding sky as she stared down at the Potomac, her back to him. The wind toyed with her hair, rippling the blue jacket that shielded taut shoulders.
For all her innate power and her Therian blood, she wasn't one of them, yet. The human world and morals had molded her thoughts and expectations. She needed time to accept the Therian ways, but time was the one thing they didn't have.
He stood, watching her, and raked his wind-tossed hair from his face. His timing might have been off, but she was right. The Ascension couldn't happen without a fully cooperative Radiant, and springing the sexual aspect of the ritual on her as they tried to ascend her would have been disastrous. At least this way she might get used to the idea by the time they got to it.
If she were his, he'd get her used to the idea. Goddess, but he'd enjoy getting her used to it. Bending her over, sliding inside her hot, wet sheath. Think of me. Only of me.
Blood rushed to his groin even as his stomach clenched with pain at the thought of kneeling at Kara's feet while Vhyper took her. How would he stand hearing Vhyper's groans and Kara's sexy whimpers as the passion rose between them? Listening to her cries as she came. Cries he'd come to love.
Goddess spare me.
He would survive it because he must, and thank the heavens and Earth he only had to be present for their coupling the one time. He'd find a way to be absent from their actual mating ritual, if it killed him.
"You aren't a bunch of shape-shifters," Kara muttered from behind the barrier of her stiff back. "You're a bunch of perverts."
Lyon had had enough. He went to her, took her by the shoulders, and forced her to face him. "You. Are. Not. Human. The sooner you stop thinking like one, the better for all of us, Kara. Yourself included."
The temper in her eyes drained away.
He softened his grip on her shoulders. "It sounds strange to you, I know, but it won't be. You'll be so caught up in the power, you won't think about being self-conscious. I promise."
The look in her eyes turned almost bleak. "I don't want it to be Vhyper."
His hands spasmed. His beast howled with a bleakness to match her own. What had he done? What grief had he pulled down on all their heads by giving in to his need for her when he'd prepped her for the Pairing? If she were his mate instead of Vhyper's, he was certain he'd be able to lead her through the ritual with relative ease because she trusted him. With the right encouragement, he could make her want him even under circumstances that might be embarrassing for her.
But Vhyper was still a stranger to her. Her acceptance of him under those trying circumstances was questionable. Even doubtful. And she must accept him.
Lyon's eyes were shuttered, his jaw tight as he squeezed her shoulders and released her. "Let's get started again. Sit down, Kara. We're going to try something a little different."
Kara wanted to argue. He was asking too much. At every turn he demanded she accept the strange ways of this world and forsake everything, she'd ever known. Forsake everything she was for a role that meant next to nothing to her. A role she'd give anything to give to someone else.
But at lunch she'd begun to accept that while the role might not mean anything to her, it meant everything to them. And she was stuck with it, whether she liked it or not.
Her teeth worried her lower lip as it occurred to her she was railing against the fates for giving her no choice. Yet those very fates had delivered her to a mansion where she was expected to live in comfort, do no work that she was aware of, and be paired with a man who would supposedly be the love of her life. Oh, and by the way, the fates had tossed in a body that never aged and healed, as it always had, miraculously fast.
All over the world, men and women, alike, were living the lives forced on them by birth and circumstance. Many of them were miserable lives, filled with hardship, abuse, and disease.
She wanted life on her terms. But that was spoiled, when so many depended on her for their power. And possibly even their lives. It was time she got over herself and concentrated on getting herself ascended. Then, maybe, she'd be in a better position to assess what kind of control she'd be able to steal in her life.
"Okay, I'm through sulking." Kara followed Lyon back to the center of the rock. "What now?"
He glanced at her, a look in his eyes that might have been relief. Or approval. "I want you to pull the power as before, but this time visualize it turning to flame in your hands."
"Why flame?"
"Because you're going to try to call fire this time. Fire is the physical form of your power."
Every time she thought she'd accepted this stuff, it turned more freaky on her.
"You're not talking about real fire, are you?"
Lyon motioned her to sit, then sat in front of her, crossing his legs as she did hers.
"The mystic fire I want you to pull looks real, but contains no heat. It won't burn you."
A thought occurred to her. "Will it hurt other people? Can I use it as a form of self-defense?" Maybe if she had some real way to protect herself, she wouldn't have to feel so afraid.
Lyon's brow quirked up, his mouth softening into a promise of a smile. "Are you seeking a way to defend yourself against me, little Radiant?"
"I was thinking more of finding a way to protect myself."
"I won't let anything harm you, Kara."
She frowned at him. "You're not with me a hundred percent of the time. You can't make promises like that." She hooked her arms around her knees.
"Humor me, Lyon. I'd feel better if I thought I had a way to protect myself."
Lyon shrugged. "Once ascended, some Radiants are able to throw fire. Real fire," he told her. "I've only seen it happen once, but I know some can do it. From what I've seen so far, I wouldn't be surprised if you were able to develop that kind of strength."
"But what about now? Can I do anything before I ascend?"
"I don't suppose you've studied karate?" It sounded like a joke, but there was no humor in his expression.
She made a face at him, then released a long-suffering sigh. "Show me how to pull the fire, Lyon. I want to know how."
He nodded once. "We'll start the same way as before, with your hands on the rock. When you feel the jolt of power this time, try to stay with it. Let it come. It could take a hundred tries before you can capture it, but it's critical you do."
Kara shrugged. "My calendar's free." She placed her hands on the rock between them, palms down, closed her eyes, and lifted her face to the wind.
She felt the rock warm beneath her palms. Be the vacuum, she thought, and pulled hard, willing it into her body. The power shot up her arms like before, and she yelped and jerked her hands back. But it hadn't hurt this time. Did he really expect her to hold on to this?
"Once you're able to hold that surge of power, I'll help you take it to the next level."
Kara licked her lips and nodded, placing her hands back on the rock, feeling a razor-sharp sense of anticipation. Holding her breath, she pulled.
Again the power caught her. Again she jerked back, this time with a laugh. She looked up to find Lyon watching her intently, a smile hovering at the edges of his mouth. If only they could stay out here like this. Sealed away from the rest of the world. Alone.
A sharp longing pierced her breastbone, and she closed her eyes against his too-perceptive gaze.