From the spot on the road in the forest, I make the five minute walk to Carcery Vale, but keep to the edge of the village, circling the houses and shops. I look on enviously at the ordinary people leading their ordinary lives.
Dervish is supposed to be tutoring me at home while I recover from the loss of my mother. Meera has supplied us with school books and equipment. Of course, Dervish hasn't once sat down to help me with schoolwork, but I've been doing it by myself. I complete the necessary exercises so that Meera can show them to the relevant authorities and keep them happy.
I enjoy the homework. I never did anything like this before. I learnt how to do practical things in my rath, like cook, wash and sharpen weapons. I memorised lots of stories and Banba taught me magic. But I never studied books-they didn't exist then. I knew nothing about global history, geography, science, mathematics.
It's fascinating. I know a lot already, courtesy of Bill-E's memories, but I'm discovering much more. Like most people, Bill-E didn't retain all that he learnt, so I only have access to the bits he remembered. But my own memory is perfect. I have total recall of anything I see, hear or read. By devouring the books Meera gives me, and watching scores of television documentaries and the news, I've pieced together many of the facts of this brave new world. Ironically I probably know more about it than most of the children who are natives of this time.
I'd love to go to school and learn from real teachers. I study as best I can at home, do my homework, watch educational programmes and surf the Internet. But that's no substitute for being taught by another person. There's so much more I could do with my brain, so many things I could uncover about the world, if I only had someone to instruct me.
But I'm not ready to mix with other people yet. What would I say? How would I mingle and pass as one of their own? I'd have to guard my tongue, always afraid I'd say something that gave away my past. I have nothing in common with these folk. I know much about their ways, from Bill-E and what I've read about them and seen on television. But in my time girls married when they were fourteen. Warriors fought naked. Slavery was a fact of life. There was nothing odd about eating the heart of a defeated enemy. We worshipped many gods and believed they directly influenced our day-to-day lives.
As I brood about the gulf between me and these people, someone coughs behind me. I'm instantly on my guard-in my experience, if somebody sneaks up on you, they're almost certainly an enemy. Whirling, my lips move fast, working on a spell. There's virtually no magic in the air, so my powers are limited, but I can still work the odd spell or two. I won't be taken easily.
It's a girl. A couple of years older than me. We're dressed in similar clothes, but she wears hers more naturally. I haven't fully got the hang of shoes and laces, soft shirts and buttons. Her hair looks much neater than mine and she wears make-up.
"Hi," the girl says.
"Hello," I reply softly, putting a name to her face and letting the spell die on my lips. She's Reni Gossel, the sister of a boy Bill-E hated. Grubbs liked this girl. Bill-E did too, although he never said, because he didn't believe he could compete with his older, bigger, more confident friend.
"I'm Reni," she says.
"Yes." I think for a moment. "I'm Rebecca Kinga." That's the fake name Meera provided me with. "Bec for short."
Reni nods and comes closer, studying me. There's a hostile shade to her eyes which unnerves me. This girl has no reason to dislike me-we don't know each other-but I think she does anyway.
"You're Dervish Grady's niece," Reni says, circling me the way I was circling the village a few minutes before.
"That's right," I mutter, not turning, staring straight ahead, shivering slightly. This girl can't hurt me, but I'm afraid she might see through me.
"Grubbs never said anything about you."
"He didn't know. It was a secret."
"A Grady with a secret." She smiles crookedly. "Nothing new in that."
"What do you mean?" I frown.
"Dervish has always been full of secrets. Grubbs too. We were close but I'm sure there were things he wasn't telling me, about his parents, his sister, Dervish." She stops in front of me. "Did you meet Grubbs?"
"Just once," I answer honestly.
"Strange how he moved out just as you moved in."
I shrug. "He was upset. When Bill-E's grandparents were killed, he wanted to get away from here. It reminded him of when his parents were murdered."
"Maybe," Reni sniffs. "But who did he go to?"
"His aunt."