“I didn’t lose any of these fights; I won them all. Everyone who hurt me is dead; I killed them. I think of the scars as an advertisement for just what a bad-ass I am.” I smiled at her, and she gave me a weak one in return.
It was Lita who said, “You dress like you don’t care about the scars at all.”
I shrugged. “I guess I don’t.”
“It would bother me,” she said.
“You get used to it,” I said.
“So you weren’t okay with it when you were my age?”
My age? I thought. I was thirty-one, and she was only twenty-one, so I guess it was accurate. I thought about it. “Actually, no, it never did bother me, if you mean cosmetically. I was worried that I might lose the full use of my arm from this.” I touched the mound of scars on the inside of my elbow bend.
Lita looked at me, head slightly to one side. “You didn’t worry that it’d make men not want you?”
“No,” I said.
“You didn’t worry that it made you look like a victim?” Kelly asked.
I frowned at her. “No, every time I look at my scars I think that I lived, and I killed what hurt me. These are victory marks, not victim,” I said.
Nicky offered me his hand, and I took it, a little puzzled. He pulled me back in against the front of his body, and he hugged me one-armed so we could both keep our gun arms free. I leaned into the solid strength of him, knowing that he’d be fast enough and deadly enough to give me those few extra seconds.
“What if Nicky fucked Kelly?” Lita asked.
Whatever look Nicky and I gave her made her hold her one hand up, as if she were unarmed. The other hand staying on the strap of her AR made it sort of a halfhearted gesture, but it was better than her usual. “Hey, I thought somewhere in all that, you said if she’d been the Rex’s lover there wouldn’t be a challenge.”
I looked up along the line of Nicky’s chest, my hands folding over the rock-hardness of his forearm. “Is Lita right?”
“Kelly is one of my fighters, not a piece of ass, and she’s worked hard to earn that.”
“So if you and she had sex, then Magda would back off?”
“Technically, yes.”
“No,” Kelly said, “no, nothing personal, Nicky, but if I hide behind you like that she still wins.”
“You can’t keep being cut up like this,” I said.
“I’ll heal,” she said.
“Would you really let Nicky sleep with her?” Meng Die asked.
I shrugged, still wrapped in the warmth of Nicky’s hug, and then said, “To stop this from happening, yeah, if he and Kelly were okay with it, yeah.”
“So you do let him fuck other people?” Lita asked.
“Not yet, I mean . . . it hasn’t come up as a topic.”
Lita looked at him as if he were crazy. “You could have permission to fuck other people and you don’t even ask.”
“I’m happy with what I’ve got,” he said.
“But it’s extra pussy and you wouldn’t even get in trouble.” Lita looked completely dumbfounded, as if she couldn’t believe he was passing up the opportunity.
“I love Anita, and she loves me.” He bent over and laid a gentle kiss on the side of my face. I turned my face so we could kiss for real. It was as tender as any kiss I’d ever had.
“But she loves the Master of the City, and the leopard king, and . . . hell, Rafael, our king, fucks her. You could fuck other women and you don’t . . . why not?”
Nicky rose up from the kiss and said, “I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I don’t want to fuck that up, literally. It’s just not worth it.”
“You mean I’m not worth it,” Lita said.
He hugged me a little tighter in against his body. “You said it, I didn’t.”
“Anita likes girls, too, now,” Meng Die said. “You could proposition her if you just wanted power, Lita. I mean, if all you want is to be closer to the center of things, why not go straight to the source?”
“I didn’t hit on Nicky for power. I like bad boys, and big, physical guys; he’s like a two-fer for me.”
“And I lose out, because I’m too nice a guy,” Dino said in a fake mournful voice. I knew that gleam in his eye well enough to know he was starting to tease her. Lita didn’t know him that well.
“Look, you’re just not my type, sorry.”
He laughed a rumble of sound with that big barrel chest of his to make it echo. “You’re not really mine, either.”
She frowned. “Then why do you keep harping on it?”
“Because I can,” he said.
She frowned harder, creating lines between her eyes that were already starting to carve their way in; if she wasn’t careful she’d bloom early and age early the way that some women did who looked lush and finished at twenty-one. Those of us who bloomed later lasted longer sometimes; it all came down to genetics, if you smoked, or tanned too much. I wondered if Lita smoked; she didn’t smell like she smoked.
“You’d turn me down?” she asked.
He gave that deep chuckle again. “Ask and find out.”
I was no longer sure if he was teasing or had maneuvered Lita into propositioning him so he could say yes. If it was what he’d just done, then Dino was way more devious than I’d given him credit for.
Nicky hugged me, and I felt his body go still; he was watching the show, too. We were both wondering if Dino was doing it on purpose.