“Just say: I will finance your penile enlargement.”
Noelle had nearly choked on her own laughter. “I don’t want to be without him. He’s mine. My McKell. I have to try and win him.” One last time, she had to try to convince him they belonged together. No matter what.
The look he’d given her just before Dallas pegged him with the tranq … hard, determined, unwavering. He meant to end things.
“I’d like to say I’m dismayed that you picked a human torch,” Ava had said, “but honestly? I expected worse.”
Yeah, Noelle had spilled about Hector’s ability. He’d kinda let the rabbit out of the hat on that one, anyway. Although things really were contained, the truth buried.
“So what do you think your likelihood of success is?” Ava had asked next.
“Darling, this is in the bag.” Bravado, pure and simple. She’d never been so unsure. With his spine of iron, Hector rarely backed down from a decision.
The parking garage’s only elevator, the one that led to and from AIR offices, dinged, opened, and out he strode. She straightened. He stopped short when he spotted her, then squared his shoulders, pasted a scowl on his face, and kicked back into motion.
“What are you doing up?” he demanded.
“Chasing you. You should feel proud. I’ve never done this for anyone else, but you’ve made me do it for you over and over again.”
“You should have stayed in bed, damn it.”
Her heart drummed unsteadily. They were off to a bad start. He’d just ignored her confession. Well, she’d just have to up the stakes. “I came here to tell you that I want you. I love you, and you need to deal with it.” There. Out in the open.
She loved him. All that he was, all that he would be. Every obstinate, protective inch of him. His power, his passion, his drive. She loved him.
Stunned disbelief, then a furious shake of his head. “No. I don’t need to deal with anything. I quit AIR. I’m leaving New Chicago. I’m leaving you.”
A move she hadn’t predicted. Sickness churned in her stomach. “I don’t care about the house. I don’t care about what was in it. Don’t do this because you feel guilty. Don’t do this because you’re scared.”
He gave a bitter laugh as he scrubbed an ungloved hand over his face. He’d taken the time to tattoo himself, the symbols dark and glossy. “Scared doesn’t even begin to describe what I feel, Noelle. If you had been near me, you would have died. Do you understand that?”
“We’ve been over this. You could have, but you didn’t. I could have, but I didn’t.”
“That’s not good enough for me.”
Here she was, fighting for him, for them, and he oh, so casually dismissed her. She reached out to flatten her palms on his chest, needing contact with him, any kind of contact, but he stepped away, out of reach.
“Hector,” she shouted, stomping her foot in frustration. “Don’t do this.”
“I could feed you some bullshit line about not thinking I’m enough for you, say I’m still concerned about my past, or even tell you all the things I want to change about you,” he said, broken, “but I won’t. Even though I know you’d haul ass and never look back. Thing is, I love you. I love you so goddamn much, I’m a mess. I’m leaving you anyway. Nothing will change that. Nothing. Do you hear me?”
He loved her. He loved her. Only that knowledge beat through her dread and rallied her. “Don’t do this, Hector. Give us a chance. Please.”
You’re begging? Yes, and she didn’t care. She just wanted him.
His jaw clenched, as if he were fighting with the need to accept. “Go back to the hospital, Noelle. There’s nothing more for us to say to each other.”
“Hector, please—”
“Stop!” he shouted, at last killing the distance and getting in her face. “Just stop. Do I need to feed you the bullshit? Is that what it’s going to take? We are done. Do you understand? Done.”
In and out she breathed, the air like fire in her lungs, scorching. As she’d feared, he wouldn’t back down. He was ending things, and that was that. He wasn’t going to try, wasn’t going to give her a chance. Even though he loved her.
“All right,” she said, tears falling freely. “Okay.”
He’d never looked more upset, but he said, “Finally.”
A shudder rippled along her vertebrae, vibrating through the rest of her. “I’m through chasing you. I’m through seducing you for your own good. I’m through!” She gave another stomp of her foot, emotion giving her strength.
“Good,” he croaked. “That’s good.”
Her chin lifted. Don’t cry anymore. Don’t you dare f**king cry anymore. “If you learn to control your ability, don’t come back for me.”
“I … won’t.”
Bastard! “You should have wanted me enough to fight for me. The way I was willing to fight for you. I mean, I convinced myself you were different than everyone else, that you really saw me, and maybe you really did, but that still wasn’t enough, was it.” A statement, not a question. “I was never enough.”
He took a step closer to her now, as if her pain had reached him as nothing else could have. “Noelle, don’t say that about yourself. You are—”
“No!” She flattened herself against the Jag, was shaking her head. Dizziness hit her, but she didn’t shut up. “You had your chance. You wanted to push me away, well, congratulations. You’ve now succeeded.”
“It’s for your own good,” he shouted, beside her and banging a fist into the metal, shaking the entire vehicle. “I’m always on edge with you. I can’t lower my guard for a second. If I do, I could kill you, and I couldn’t live with myself if that happened. You deserve better. You deserve a man who can touch you. A man who can give you everything you need.”
You were that man. He would never think so, though. “You know what? One day I’ll get over you and move on.” A lie, such a terrible lie. “One day I’ll find a man who actually enjoys spending time with me, who thinks I’m worth any risk, even a risk to myself. But you … you’ll never get over me. I’m it for you and without me, you might as well curl up and die.”
Tears filled his eyes, the gold shimmering. “You’re right. You are it for me. I know there will never be anyone else. And I don’t want anyone—” Suddenly his mouth sagged open, strange sounds escaping, and then his knees buckled.