"I bet that blonde cunt never let you get this far." Jenny cried. "Happy New Years you fuck!" she yelled. I slammed the door. Cold air slapped my face where Jenny's words left off. The dog howled again.

Streetlights and starlight accompanied me home. Laying on the couch, I hoped the nineties would be better than the eighties. They had to be, I thought. I was wrong.

***

In the lexicon of teenagedom, the two most terrifying words are "I'm pregnant!" Believe me, I know. About the time Shannie and I took our first jump course, Jenny said the magic words. She cornered me at the seven-eleven across from the high school.

"What?" I leaned against the front of the store.

"Did I stutter?"

"Maybe it's not mine. Did you ask Lucas?" I clenched tightly so I wouldn't piss my pants. I imagined Shannie's smile, more unattainable than ever.

"I'm not a slut," Jenny cried, shoving me into a garbage can. "I don't sleep around." A crowd gathered.

"Really, You had me, Stevie boy, Yerrington," Yerrington was a lie, but who's counting.

"I did not!" Jenny barked.

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"You told me yourself." I felt the approval of the gathering crowd.

"You're full of it. I won't let that geek fuck me with your puny prick." Hoots of approval encouraged Jenny.

"How do you know it's not Stevie boy's?"

"I didn't fuck him!" Jenny crooned "Recently!" she mumbled.

"You didn't fuck me recently either," I countered.

"If fucking's what you call it! Mr. Peter Puny Prick!" More laughter. "New Years wasn't that long ago."

Snickers and smirks teased me.

"You better think of something faster than your dick, Mr. Less-than-a-minute-man," Jenny warned. Her hot, humid breath pruned my skin. "I ain't holding the bag on this one."

I wished Count was home. He'd know what to do. I could try calling him. But, I didn't know the number. I could write, that would take too long. I couldn't talk to my father; Diane and Shannie were out of the question! Steve Lucas - I do better talking to a wall. So I did what most teenagers do: I avoided Jenny; I avoided thinking about her and hoped it went away.

"At least Jenny Slut doesn't have AIDS," Steve Lucas said. Jenny Slut was Steve's new nickname for my favorite New Year's date.

"Thanks for the sentiments, ass wipe."