He stood there, looking at me, stunned. “Courtney, you know you wanted this as much as I did. I saw it in your eyes.”
I wanted to scream, but I stayed calm. I shook my head and whispered, “No, I didn’t. I wanted my first time to be with someone who loved me. I wanted my Prince Charming, and all I got was a monster who treated me like I was nothing but a piece of meat for him to do with as he pleased. You’re not my Prince Charming. You’re my worst nightmare.”
He smirked at me and put his hands up. “Then, shoot me. I don’t think you have it in you.”
I slowly smiled and watched as his smile dropped from his face.
“You don’t know me very well, Noah. How about I give you a warning?” I pointed the gun down to his thigh, and I was just about to pull the trigger when he jumped back.
“Stop! Courtney, stop! I get it, okay? You’re serious. Just please put the gun down, okay? Just please put the gun down.”
“Get out of my room. If you ever set foot in my room again, I swear to God, I will kill you.”
He quickly put his shirt back on and went to leave. “I take it you’re not going to the prom with me?”
My mouth dropped open, and I just looked at him. “I suggest you stop staying over. If I have to sit outside my sister’s bedroom door with this gun, I will. And as far as prom goes, no, Noah. I never want to even talk to you again.”
He grabbed the door handle and quietly opened the door before shutting it.
I dropped the gun onto my bed and broke down crying. I wasn’t sure how long I sat on my bed, rocking back and forth, as I whispered over and over again, “Please, God…please…let that be the end. Please let that be the end.”
“Courtney? Hello? Earth to Court?” Reed waved his hand in front of my face.
I pushed his hand away and took a step back. “Stay away from me.”
He looked at me, confused. “What?”
“I don’t need your goddamn help. I just dropped the jar. You don’t need to come rushing in like you’re my knight in shining armor or like I’m a child who can’t take care of myself.”
I felt my heart beating a mile a minute, and the hurt in Reed’s eyes about killed me.
“Wait, I walked in, and you were crying. I thought…I thought you were hurt and—”
“I’m not. I just…I don’t know why I started crying. It’s just stupid hormones or something. I don’t know. I just…I just need you to leave me alone.”
I turned to walk back into the kitchen, and he grabbed my arm.
“Courtney, wait a minute. What in the hell happened? You were fine a few minutes ago. Now, you’re pissed at me because I tried to help you?”
I spun around and jerked my arm from his grip. “I. Don’t. Need. Your. Help. You’re all the same, all of you. You’re always wanting something, and you don’t care who you use to get it.” I stood there and fought like hell to hold in my tears.
He looked at me, and I saw the anger in his eyes.
“Who are you talking to, Courtney? Me or someone else?”
“What?”
He took a step closer to me. “Are you mad at me? Or are you pissed at some other asshole who hurt you, and you’re taking it out on me?”
I swallowed and stepped away from him. “I don’t…I don’t want to be with you, Reed. You’ll just end up hurting me like…like…”
“Like who? Mitch? Because if you even think you’re going to compare me to Mitch, then you don’t know me at all, Courtney.”
I put my hands on my hips and straightened out my shoulders. “Does it matter? I know you’ve used women before, Reed. I know you’ve slept with other women, and it was meaningless. You’re no different than the rest of them.”
I turned to walk away, and he grabbed me again, spinning me around.
“Don’t act all innocent, like you’ve only ever slept with Mitch, Courtney. What? You’re a twenty-five-year-old girl who lost her virginity to Mitch? Is that what you’re saying? So, if you want to judge me, let’s hear all your dirty little secrets.”
I tried pulling out of his grip, but my body started to tremble. “Don’t say that,” I whispered.
“Don’t say what? You accused me of being an asshole who sleeps around. Why can we talk about my sex life but not yours?”
An image of Noah popped into my head—him on top of me, telling me how good I felt. I started to feel sick to my stomach.
I let a sob escape from my mouth, and I whispered, “Please let me go, Reed. Please let me go.”
He took one look into my eyes and instantly let me go. “Courtney, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to…”
I put my hand up to my mouth and fought to hold in my tears. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed the paper towels before making my way over to the mess on the floor.
Reed stepped in front of me. “I’ll clean it up.”
I looked up at him and sucked in a breath of air. He had tears in his eyes.
I slowly nodded my head and said, “I didn’t mean to say all of that. I just…”
A small smile spread across his face. “It’s okay. I crossed a line, and I’m sorry. I know you’re not a child, and I need to stop treating you like one. I’m sorry.”
He took the paper towels from my hand and bent down. As he began cleaning up the mess, I reached over and turned off the oven and stove before walking out of the kitchen.
I headed straight for the shower where I spent the next hour crying until I had no tears left to cry and scrubbing my body until the smell of Noah was gone.
Kevin had stopped by earlier and helped me with some things that needed to be done around the ranch, and now, I was finally able to sit down and relax. I glanced around, looking for any signs of Courtney.
The last few days, she had been going over to Mimi and Frank’s, the neighbors on the ranch next to Layton’s. I was sure she’d been spending time talking about books with Mimi. She’d even bought Mimi a Kindle Fire HD after receiving the one I’d bought her since the dogs destroyed her original Kindle.
“Mr. Moore?” Johnny called out.
Johnny was the high school kid I’d ended up hiring last week to help out for a bit until Layton got back from his honeymoon. Johnny was friends with Ryan, the kid Layton had hired last summer.
I stood up and walked over to the gate. “Hey, Johnny. You get everything done?”