I stalked out of the house after the meeting was over, ready to make my rounds. "You must hold your anger in check," Gavin came up silently beside me.

"Trust me, I am holding my anger in check," I snapped.

"I understand what you are going through," he added. That brought me to a standstill. I stared at him, dumbfounded. As usual, his face was an expressionless mask.

"Buddy," I said, poking him in the chest with a finger, "You have no f**king idea what I'm going through. Now stay the hell away from me." I nearly ran to get away from him.

Tears aren't easy for a vampire. They are hard for our bodies to make, I suppose, since we don't take in water or anything. At least they were mostly clear and not blood. It was something I learned that night. I wiped them away angrily when Gavin was on the other side of the house and pretended nothing was wrong when I passed him on patrol. I was sensitive to every rustle, every sound and every little breeze on that February evening in Oklahoma. Perhaps it would have been therapeutic to take out my frustrations on a nameless, faceless enemy, but now, in addition to keeping my eyes and ears open for an attack from Serge and Ed, terrorists or organized crime wanted to come calling. I had to be ready for that. Winkler had hired me almost sight unseen that very first night and I owed him. The other person I felt I owed, however, was me. I don't know why Phil's little dig upset me so much, but it did. Now I had to find a way to get past that. Had to.

Phil and Glen took over at five so I went to my bedroom and shut the door—I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. Therefore, it was poetic justice when Gavin came knocking. Sunrise wouldn't come for another hour and thirty-five minutes, so what the hell. Why not entertain company?

"Go away," I yelled.

He opened the door anyway. "What do you want?" my voice was surly. A month ago, I wouldn't have treated my worst enemy that way.

"I thought you might want to talk." His face remained shuttered as it usually did, his dark eyes raking my face.

"About what? And since when do you talk? Your stimulating conversation is only outstripped by your sparkling wit," I muttered, refusing to take the bait.

Gavin turned his head and it took me a few minutes to realize he was chuckling. At least the mask had cracked a little. I threw a pillow at his head, which he ducked easily. "Go away," I snapped.

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"Is that the worst you're going to do?" he lifted his gaze to me after he ducked the pillow and his dark brown eyes were still laughing even if his mouth wasn't.

"Hmmph," I said. "What did you do to deserve worse? There might be a couple of people I'd like to beat into the ground, but I have no idea where they are and they'd probably get me first," I said. "That might not be a bad thing. They could finish what they started. You know," I pointed my second pillow at him, "It's not dying that worries me. It's the pain beforehand. Now go away. I want to wallow in misery for a while."

"All right." He backed out of my doorway and closed the door.

* * *

"Honored One, I saw her control her temper last evening. I was worried that she was about to attack one of the others, but a brief bout of anger was all she displayed and then calmed herself. It was quite interesting to watch, truly.

G."

Gavin shut his laptop. He had no doubt that the two Lissa had referred to were Sergio and Edward. It was a shame he couldn't tell her that they'd been shipped off to London and locked away until the Council could deal with them. Unfortunately, the Council wouldn't deal with them until after Lissa herself had been eliminated and Gavin had returned to report to the Council. She'd given him important information, however. He would make her death as swift and painless as he could.

Chapter 5

Vampires don't dream. At least I didn't, and I liked dreams, most of the time. And how old did vampires get? Were they immortal like all the books and movies said or did they die after a while, getting all shriveled and wrinkly until one day, poof? No more vampire? I was beginning to think of the missing manual as the FVM—Fucking Vampire Manual. Lists of thoughts and questions felt like a good idea at times. At other times, it seemed like the worst possible thing I could do. What if somebody went through my belongings? Would they find my lists and break out the stakes to stab into my chest or the long, sharp swords to behead me? Maybe my first trip out should consist of a visit to a church, just to see if I could walk into the thing.

"Day off tomorrow," Davis informed us as we showed up for our shift. Gavin was back to his usual, silent self, I noticed. I didn't speak to him, either. "Winkler says you can borrow a van or a car if you want to go out," Davis went on. "The new security guards will be working in your place and the electronics crew will be working round the clock; they're bringing enough people for two full shifts."

A day off. I was heading to the bookstore, first thing. There was a Barnes and Noble nearby; I'd hit that first. And then maybe the church. Or I'd try going to Don's grave. I wondered if I could get flowers somewhere. I didn't want any of those plastic things and the silk ones usually got stolen or trashed later. The real thing was temporary, just like most people's lives. And they generally smelled better. Some of the grocery stores carried flowers, I knew. I'd check into that.

It was while I was making my rounds a while later that I heard rustling outside the fence. Stopping on a dime, I went completely still to listen. More rustling came, and what sounded like footsteps. I pulled out my cell, sending a prearranged text to Gavin—Help. He was there in seconds, coming right to me as if he knew, somehow, where I would be. I smelled him before he arrived; that wonderful scent hadn't left him and hadn't dulled with time, either. I'd finally put it out of my mind—it was a mystery I probably wasn't destined to solve.

Gavin heard the shuffling the minute he arrived. Putting a finger to his lips to keep me silent, he ran noiselessly down the wall for around thirty feet before jumping up, lightly catching the edge of the wall and lifting himself to the top. He crouched there once he was up, watching. We heard giggling then, and a lighter clicking. Now I knew what was happening; the unmistakable smell of pot wafted over the wall. What is it with people and their wacky weed? Maybe I was a prude, but I'd never tried it. Honest. And now they were causing me to jump at shadows. Too bad I'd already fed, but then I recalled the drunk at the bar and thought better of that idea.

"Just keep an ear out," Gavin was back at my side, speaking softly. When had he jumped down? I hadn't seen or heard it. I'd have to do better than that. Nodding to him, I went on my way. The smokers were gone when I next passed that spot.