The Daily Telegraph

24 January

The small idyllic village of Glamis, Scotland, was rocked by a series of loud explosions last night. Police are investigating the site of a local warehouse which appeared to have been almost completely destroyed by the blast. Residents of the village have reported seeing a massive tent being erected over the site in the early hours of the morning, as well as several large portable fencing units.

"They're not letting us get any closer than this," said a local farmer who formed part of the crowd gathered around the barriers earlier today.

"I have a right to know what's going on. My lands run along the eastern part of this site, and I want to know if I can expect to be blown up in the middle of the night while I sleep," he said.

So far authorities have declined to speak to the press, but an anonymous source within the police department suggests that there may be several bodies within the wreckage. We have been unable to confirm these reports.

There are also rumours that this may be the work of a local terrorist cell. Another local resident, who did not wish to be named, told us that the warehouse concerned had been the source of much conjecture in the past few years.

"We thought it was a cult that had set up in there, though why anyone would want to do something like that here is beyond me. Now they are saying that this could be the work of Al Qaeda. Why here, I want to know? It's not like it's a populated area, or important in any way. If I'm honest, it's really the arse end of nowhere. It's got to be a cult."

The Daily Telegraph

15 February

A farmhouse as well as several large outbuildings were discovered by an employee of the Royal Mail to be burnt to the ground this morning. This brings the total number of structures destroyed by fire in the eastern part of Scotland to twelve. Police spokesperson Anita Josephson said today that it was likely that a serial arsonist had been at work here.

"They're very organised, very efficient. So far they have targeted a number of very isolated buildings, and the only evidence we've been able to find have been a few footprints and the tracks of a large van, possibly a Ford Transit. At this stage it seems unlikely that we will ever catch the arsonists."

When asked if cutbacks and reduced staffing of the Fire and Rescue Service had anything to do with the inability to apprehend those responsible, Ms Josephson said, "No comment."




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