He opens one eye. In fairness, he says, Ike did help to pul you out, so that should probly only count fer half. He holds out his hand to me.
Al right, help me up. But go easy.
I yank him as hard as I can. A hot pain shoots across my right shoulder. I gasp. It feels like it’s on re. I bin so set on savin myself an savin Jack, I ain’t even felt it til now.
You got slashed, he says. I fergot al about it. Let me take a look.
He reaches out. I slap his hand away.
Leave me be, I says, I’m fine.
Don’t be so damn stubborn, he says. C’mere.
Go to hel , I says. I head back across the lakebed in the direction th’others took, col ectin my crossbow on the way. I walk fast an I don’t look back. I ain’t waitin fer him.
Behind me, he starts to sing.
I’ve climbed the high mountains an sailed the wide seas
Fair faces a-plenty I’ve gazed on
But with one glance, her beauty sent me to my knees,
O hard-hearted Annie I never shall please.
I’ve roved an I’ve rambled all o’er the wide world
And kisses a-plenty I’ve tasted
But it’s her wine-sweet lips that I’m still dreaming of
O hard-hearted Annie, cruel Annie my love.
I’ve loved many women an wooed many girls
And many soft arms have embraced me
If only she’d lie with me one fleeting night
With hard-hearted Annie I’d die of delight.
Oh many fine beauties did beg me to stay
But none until Annie did snare me
Though she hurts me an shuns me an makes my heart bleed
My hard-hearted Annie I never shall leave.
I don’t think most people ’ud feel like singin jest after they’d fought o hunnerds of hel wurms. But Jack ain’t most people. I should know that by now.
He’s got a strong voice. It carries over the lake, clear as if he’s walkin right beside me. The tune ain’t bad. An he’s a fair singer. But after he’s sung it through once he goes back to the beginnin an starts al over agin. Pret y soon I ain’t jest sick of the tune an his voice, I’m also sick of hearin about hard-hearted Annie.
What a stupid song.
I mean, what kinda fool ’ud put up with a woman that troublesome?
I dare a look at my shoulder while I walk. I ease my shirt away, slow an careful. Dried blood sticks to the cloth, pul s at the wound. I bite my lip so’s I don’t cry out. Jack’s stil somewhere behind me. Don’t let him hear. Only one tear in the skin, but it looks deep enough. It’s throbbin somethin fierce.
But the pain ain’t no worse’n what I used to feel after a rough ght in the Cage. I tel myself that, over an over. That’s the way to keep it unner control. I jest need to do what I did then. Cut my brain o from what my body’s feelin. Make myself believe it’s happenin to somebody else.
Think of somethin else.
Think of Lugh. Think how he looked the last time I seen him. Thrown over the back of a horse, wrists an ankles tied, like a beast.
They kil ed my father. They stole my brother.
It’s the anger that keeps me goin.
I feel its heat in my bel y. Al through me.
Heat.
So hot.
Soon’s I catch up with Emmi an th’others, I’l bathe my shoulder an pack it with … with bark. That’s it, I’l pack it with … what was it now?
My feet’s so heavy. Like I got somethin tied to the end of my legs. Need to keep goin. Got a git to … where am I goin agin? Oh yeah. To Lugh, that’s it. But I’m jest gonna hafta … sit. Jest fer a moment.
I sink down.
It’s night. It should be cool but I’m sweatin like bil y-o. I go to wipe my forehead with my sleeve but my arm … cain’t lift it. Now I remember. My shoulder. Must be … infected.
Got a find Lugh.
I’m jest so … tired. Must … lie … down …
I’m ve year old. It’s a sunny day. I’m on the shore at Silverlake. I’m by myself. A breeze lifts my hair. The lake water laps softly. I’m crouched down, pilin up flat stones, al white, one on top of th’other. I count as I go.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven!
A shadow fal s over me. I look up. It’s Pa. Like he used to be when I was a kid. Before Ma died. Thick black hair, smilin eyes, strong, handsome.
Seven, Pa! Look at that!
He hunkers down beside me. Takes my hand.
They’re gonna need you, Saba, he says. Lugh an Emmi. There’l be others too, many others, who wil look to you, an you’l hafta stand alone. Don’t give in to fear. Be strong, like I know you are. An never give up, d’you unnerstand, never. No mat er what happens.
I smile at him.
I won’t, I says. I ain’t no quit er, Pa.
That’s my girl, he says. Then he’s gone. Jest like that. Disappeared.
Pa! I jump to my feet. Where are you, Pa? Come back!
His voice echoes, drifts away, git in softer an softer. That’s my girl, my girl, my girl.
Pa! I look around, frantic to nd him. But he’s gone. Silverlake is dry. The ground unner my feet an as far as I can see is parched an cracked.
Darkness. Voices. Angry. Shoutin. I cain’t hear the words though.
Then it al stops.
A flash of white light. An Epona stands there. Alone. Darkness al around her.
There’s only the sound of my heart. Beat, beat, beat.
Epona looks over her shoulder, like she sees somethin behind her. She turns back agin. She sees me. She nods.
An it al happens slowly. So slow, I can see the blink of her eyelids. I can see her lips move as she takes in a breath.
Beat, beat, beat goes my heart.
She starts to run towards me. She throws her arms wide open an lifts her face up. She leaps.
A flash of white light.
An the world smashes into a mil ion pieces.
Jack! I think she’s awake! Emmi’s voice.
There’s a dul throb in my right shoulder. I hear the crackle of a re. Somebody kneels beside me. Lays a hand on my forehead. It’s cal used, cool. Nice on my warm skin.
Slowly I open my eyes. I’m lookin up at rock. I frown.
It’s a cave, says Jack.
I turn my head to look at him. In the flicker of the firelight, his silver moon eyes glit er. His skin gleams. He’s beautiful.
Welcome back, he says.
I lift my hand an touch his cheek. It’s warm. Rough with stubble.
Jack, I says.
He goes stil . He puts my hand back down on the blanket. I’l git you a drink, he says an disappears.
Emmi? I says.
I’m here! She grabs my hand an kisses it, over an over.
Hey Emmi, I says. C’mon now, I’m fine.
I was afeared you’d die, she says. You had a fever. You was shoutin out, cal in fer Pa.
Was I? Em … I was havin the strangest dreams.
Jack’s back. Here you go, he says. He puts his arm around my shoulders an raises me up. I wince.
Sorry, he says. He holds a cup to my mouth an I drink. It’s bit er an I make a face. Wil ow bark, he says. It brings down the fever. I brewed it myself.
He makes me drink the cup dry before he lets me stop.
My right shoulder’s wrapped tight in a strip of ripped shirt. How bad is it? I says.
A lot bet er’n it was, he says. We cleaned you up an put a poultice on to draw out th’infection. That wurm slashed you deep. It needs stitchin, but we had to wait til it’s clean.