But I’m surprised, when I do, to find Mila standing in front of me.
She seems uncertain, but she’s so f**king beautiful in the morning sun. Radiant, actually. She doesn’t seem hung-over at all. Her dark hair is loose and flowing and the morning breeze carries her scent to me. I inhale it and stare at her.
“What are you doing out here?” I ask groggily. I squint into the light, then rub my forehead. As I do, I wince because my f**king hand hurts. And then I realize that I must have fallen asleep here. The night air made my throat scratchy, so I clear it, then clear it again. “Are you feeling alright?”
I glance down and find that my bottle of whiskey is beside me on the beach, its contents spilled onto the sand. I think. I certainly hope I hadn’t drunk the whole thing. If I did, I’m going to feel it later today, just like Mila.
Mila looks even more uncertain now.
“I… uh.” She shifts her weight from one foot to the other nervously. I look at her and c**k an eyebrow. “I feel fine. Mostly. My mouth is dry and I have a headache. I don’t, um. I don’t remember exactly what all happened last night. But I sort of remember that you punched Jared and brought me here. And I think you might have broken his hand.”
I eye her. “Yeah, that happened. Do you make a habit of getting trashed at the Bear’s Den and going home with ass**les?”
It came out a little harsher than I meant for it to and Mila flinches.
“No,” she answers quickly. “In fact, I don’t usually drink much at all, unless it is wine at dinner. Maddy has been bugging me to go out with her and blow the cogs off and after yesterday, I just felt like I needed it.”
I stare at her with interest now, my lip twitching.
“I think you mean cobwebs. And what about yesterday? When you rejected me, you mean?”
Color floods her cheeks and she stares at the sand.
“Yes.”
“If that was stressful for you, then did you ever think that maybe you made a mistake? That maybe you shouldn’t have rejected me? And that maybe you should give this thing a chance?”
I stare at her, trying to force her to meet my gaze.
“Well,” I prompt. “Have you?”
She lifts her chin, her green eyes bright.
“That’s all I’ve thought about since you left my shop yesterday,” she admits. “All I can think of is you. Even when I was with Madison and Jared last night. And then when you were there at the bar, it was all I could do to keep from running over and jumping in your lap.”
I c**k my head. “Why didn’t you? I think I would have enjoyed that.”
She blushes again, her cheeks and neck flushing prettily.
“I think it might be considered socially inappropriate,” she replies wryly. “Thank you for coming to my rescue last night. I guess we’re even now. I saved you, then you saved me back.“ She pauses and looks at the ground before she looks back up at me.
“And I have been thinking about you. It’s probably not smart or good for me, but it’s all I seem to do lately. I think about you. Is your apology still on the table from yesterday? Because if it is, then I think maybe you were right. Maybe this is worth taking a risk for.”
She fidgets with her hands nervously.
I raise an eyebrow, deliberately obtuse.
“This? Can you be more specific?”
She doesn’t answer. She just bends down without hesitation and kisses me square on the mouth.
The lips that I fantasized about last night are on mine, her tongue in my mouth. I know that I taste like whiskey and smokes, but I don’t care and she doesn’t seem to either. She tastes like heaven.
Finally, she pulls away and I can see that she is a bit breathless.
“So, was that a yes?” she asks hesitantly.
I shake my head in bewilderment and smile at her. Having her here like this is f**king amazing. And surprising. My chest is swelling with the amazing feeling so much that I can’t believe my next words.
“That’s a yes,” I tell her. “My apology is still on the table. But I think I probably owe you another one.”
Chapter Nine
Mila
I stare at Pax.
Even though he’s gorgeous, he looks rough, like he had one hell of a night. He’s got two-day stubble now and he’s wearing the same clothing that he was wearing yesterday. His eyes are rimmed in red, like he didn’t sleep much. Or he had way too much to drink. Or maybe he even did too much of something else.
I narrow my eyes.
“What do you need to apologize for now?” I ask hesitantly. I’m not sure if I want to know. And he looks like he’s not sure that he wants to tell me. I back away a few steps. It can’t be worse than getting a b**w j*b from Jill, can it?
He holds his hand up. “Wait, Mila. Just listen.”
He stares at me.
I stare back.
He sighs.
I wait.
“Yes?” I ask and even I can hear the trepidation in my tone. I swallow. He dips his head, then returns my stare.
“I think we might be onto something good here and I don’t want to f**k it up by starting it out with lies.”
I’m confused now. Lies? He’s lied to me already? As if he can hear my thoughts, Pax shakes his head.
“I haven’t lied to you yet,” he explains. “But if I don’t tell you what I did last night, then you won’t understand what kind of person that I am. And that would be the biggest lie of all.”
“What kind of person are you?” I whisper. “Did you try something with me last night?” The morning breeze blows my hair into my face and impatiently, I shove it behind my ears. I need to hear this, even if it isn’t pretty.
Pax is hesitant now, unsure. The look on his face drops a big iron weight upon my heart because I know that whatever he wants to tell me isn’t good. Maybe coming out here was a bad idea. I should have known. I want to back away, but I resist the urge and plant my feet firmly in the sand.
Pax catches my gaze and lifts his chin, sighing heavily.
“I’m the kind of person who gets pissed and then goes off and does stupid shit to try and block out my anger. Or my hurt. I don’t deal with things in a healthy way. I deal with them in shitty ways, like drugs or women. Or whiskey. Last night, I chose whiskey and a woman. Although the woman wasn’t you. I didn’t try and take advantage of you.”