We're both excited as hell, and I make her come even before I shoot my load all over my stomach, a few minutes later. It doesn't happen often that she gives me a hand job, and I really don't care; just wipe myself clean with my t-shirt. Bella looks exceptionally pleased with herself as we make our way upstairs, where we shower together before we fall into our bed.
She's asleep in minutes, lying half on my shoulder and chest, and I spend nearly an hour just staring at her beautiful face, tired but unable to fall sleep myself. My thoughts return to my conversation with Beth, and I want to deny that she was right, that I have to do something to make sure that I don't keep dragging on Bella's happiness like I used to, inadvertently.
Because for her, I'd simply do anything.
Chapter 5
Yesterday it all sounded so perfect. Why then am I shitting my pants today?
It's not like I haven't done any joint scene planning before. Beth and Peter both helped me when I had my first sub, and I've always talked everything through in detail with Charlotte when she let me tie her up. Over the years I've been doing it over and over again with subs I've only played with for a scene or two. Why the anxiety now?
It's not even a rational fear, just a feeling in my gut. As if Bella would laugh at me if I say something stupid. It's ridiculous, really, but it won't go away, as much as I try to get a grip on myself.
I spent the whole day fretting over what to tell her, but by the time I'm home again, I still haven't come up with an idea that I think is worthy of the occasion. It suddenly seems as if we've done everything at least five times already, and try as I might, nothing really new comes to my mind. Bella is of course ecstatic to have me home again, jumping into my arms and kissing my whole face before I'm even through the door. I don't want to disappoint her with being the least inventive guy in the world, but I don't see how she won't frown at how little I have come up with.
We've both already eaten dinner, so it's just a matter of getting some coffee, and we sit down on the couch. More precisely, I sit down on the couch and Bella settles on my thighs, facing me. Of course having her straddle me makes me overtly aware that I didn't find the time today to jerk off in the toilet after spending my lunch break fantasizing about the many ways I could tie her up, always a bad idea, that.
“So, you ready for our talk?”
I'm always ready for you, Bella, and when you look at me like that, something else than 'talking' comes to mind.
I have no idea where I find the self-restraint to keep my hands on the couch, as I really want to touch her, but she looks all cute in her eagerness, and I tell myself I can always fuck her later. Probably have to or else I will explode, and not just in my pants.
“I guess I am. So what do you wanna know?”
Bella nibbles on her bottom lip, and I so want to drag it from between her teeth with my own, but instead take a sip of my coffee. I know this will get a lot worse before it gets better, and I try to keep a tight grip on myself.
'Tight grip' just reminds me of what she did to me yesterday, and my problem grows at least an inch. Great conversation starter, really. Yeah, Bella, so I have been trying to think, but really I just have a boner, and don't you want to take care of that before we start talking of the many ways I want to have you in my playroom, so that I can ask you for a repeat performance in five minutes again?
For some reason my thoughts are not plain on my face, or else Bella is distracted, because she doesn't do any of the things she usually resorts to when she realizes that the monster in my jeans is awake and drooling for her, but instead plucks on some imaginary lint on her sleeve.
“How do you come up with ideas? I know you don't use any cheat sheets or anything like that. Although the notion cracks me up.” I try hard to concentrate on the question, but the answer doesn't exactly help my problem.
“The internet, mostly.”
“Don't tell me you watch porn online!”
I laugh, mostly at the way she scrunches up her nose.
“You know what's on my hard drive, no need to turn on the modem for that.”
Bella considers that for a moment, but once again doesn't acknowledge my
'collection'.
“If it's not porn that you're watching, what are you doing instead?”
“Research.”
“Where?”
“The shoot previews of some of the kinky sites.”
Her nose does that adorable twitching again.
“And how is that not porn?”
“It's just pictures. And some text.”
“How is something like 'and then she gets fucked hard, tied in various positions' with demonstrative pictures not porn?”
I grin up at her when I see her cheeks turn slightly red. “Why, is that a direct quote, love?”
More lip biting, and her shrug doesn't seem too convincing.
“Maybe.”
“Maybe?”
She glares at me for a moment, but then shrugs once more. “So I went through your visited links this afternoon after Beth told me about your
'accident' the other day, and maybe got a little caught up there. So what?!” Her indignation, together with the deepening blush, just makes me laugh.
Awesome, my girl is getting turned on by snooping around the same sites as I do. I don't even mind that she did it, might have been more fun doing it together, though.
“Whether it's porn or not doesn't really matter. It's great inspirational material.”
Bella is still pursing her lips, but then she lets it slide.
“Okay. Inspiration has struck, what's next?”
“Then I try to decide on a general theme. Like, what do I want to base the whole scene on? Bondage, toys, role playing, that kind of thing.” She nods. “And what have you come up with for our planning?” I try to decide what I should tell her, but I know it's best to keep it simple.
As our conversation goes on, the remaining anxiety falls away and all that's left is excitement that I can share this with her.
“Two scenes. One more action driven, the other all about sensations.” Bella visibly perks up. “Oh? Tell me more. Action driven one first. That sounds way dirtier.”
I roll my eyes at her, but really want to kiss her for being so receptive.
“I guess it is, although probably not the way you think. If I have my say, which I guess I do have, seeing as I'm your Dom, you won't have too much freedom of movement in either scenario.”
She makes a face in response, but the glint in her eyes doesn't go away.
“So what are you going to do with me? Tie me up?”
“I thought about trying something new that we haven't really done before to that extent. You remember that screw-on board for the padded bench that you asked me about when we were packing up the playroom for the move?”
“The one with the weird holes? You never told me what it is, exactly.”
“Stocks.”
I can see her thoughts running wild behind her eyes, and she cocks her head to the side, considering.
“As in medieval stocks, that thing they put people in on the town square so everyone could throw foul vegetables at them?”
The visual makes me laugh.
“Exactly, only that I won't throw anything at you.” I give her a few moments to think about that, meanwhile running my hands up and down her thighs in what I hope is a soothing gesture. A light frown mars her forehead while she contemplates my suggestion, but finally she nods, making my heart skip a beat or two in anticipation.
“Just my hands, or my neck, too? I remember there were three holes in that wood frame.”
“You decide how far you want to go, whatever you want is fine with me. We can do just your hands, so you'll be secured, but you can still move your body somewhat freely as long as you don't get off the bench. I won't lie, I'd like to secure your neck, too. Don't worry, the whole thing is padded, and the holes are large enough that you won't even feel it around your neck if you keep your head straight. But that way you're fully restrained and can't even look over your shoulder, so that whatever I do behind your back you won't know until I touch you.”
My cock definitely likes the picture of Bella's ass sticking into the air that way. She still looks a little hesitant, so I bring my hands up to cup her face, and stroke her cheeks gently.
“Just think about it for a moment. You're kneeling on the bench, your wrists and neck all secured so you can't move, can't get away. You're vulnerable, helpless, more so than ever before because the rope you can pull off, and the cuffs are not that hard to unbuckle, either, but there's no way you can open the stocks yourself, you're completely at my mercy.” I let my hands drift lower so that I'm running my fingers down to her shoulders, idly stroking over her soft skin.
“That also means that your ass is in the air, and I can run my fingers up and down your thighs, or in between. Maybe I'll even tie your ankles to the bench, spread wide to leave you completely open to me. There's really not much you can do now, I can touch you, spank you, fuck you, make you come over and over again – whatever I want to do to you.” Her lips are slightly parted by the end of my little explanation, and I can tell that I'm not the only one who's excited about the idea.
“How does that sound to you, my little minx?”