"What did you say about seeing him again?"
"I told him I had a very nice life here with a very nice boyfriend and I didn't want to mess that up. Drake thinks I still have strong feelings for him, too."
"Well, do you?" Bernadette asked with a serious expression.
"To be honest, yes, I still love him. I never stopped in the whole twelve years since we parted. Even when he married that skank, Autumn, and she had his son, I still wondered what if I had forgiven him. Things could have been so different. I would have learned to love his child, given time. Hindsight is always twenty-twenty."
"Where does that leave David?"
"When I met David, as you know, I was afraid to love again. David knocked down the barriers one by one, until I fell in love with him. Bernadette, I love David. I'm just so torn."
"Don't take what I am about to say the wrong way. But, do you truly love David? It seems as if you're trying to convince yourself of your love for him, because you are scared to death of the love you have for Drake."
"I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything," I said, although there was a ring of truth in her words. Gathering my trash, I ended the conversation as lunch was almost over.
"Don't be upset, Alyssa, it was just an observation. You know your heart better than anyone."
"I know you were just trying to help. Everything is cool. I'll talk to you later," I said as I left and went to finish the remainder of my workday.
Tuesday morning, I awoke from a sleepless night of tossing and turning. I had to find the strength to prepare for the coming day. Lifting my legs out of bed and onto the floor, I sat there for a moment before pushing myself into action. Taking a quick shower before dressing, I prepared my usual bowl of cereal and banana before heading out the door to begin my work day.