And started thinking about what it would feel like to have Killian run his tongue down my spine.
To feel those strong, beautiful hands gripping my hips, strumming my nipples like he delicately plucked the strings of his Taylor . . .
My chest rose and fell in shallow breaths, aware of everything about him as he stood in the dark beside me. His breathing sounded shallow too; he emanated hot tension. He shifted from one foot to the other, as if restless.
He lifted his glass to take another drink and his arm brushed against mine, sending an overreaction of sensation, a prickle of goosebumps along my skin.
After song five, I knew I needed to get away from Killian or I was going to ruin everything by throwing myself at him. I bravely made contact by nudging him and he frowned down at me.
I mimicked the act of drinking and then hurried out and down to the bar.
Having a floor between us really helped.
I almost collapsed against the bar in relief and exhaustion.
The bartender chuckled as he wandered down the quiet bar toward me. “Bad date?”
No, the absolute opposite of a bad date. “No. Just too warm. Can I have a half pint of the King Tut’s Lager?”
“Ye sure can.” He pulled a pint and then looked up at me quizzically. “Ye know, I’ve been trying tae place ye all night, thinking we’ve met before.”
I tensed, not needing to deal with being recognized on top of my out-of-control attraction to a man I couldn’t have. I wrinkled my nose in confusion. “Oh. I don’t think so.”
“No, but then ye started talking and it hit me.” He came back down the bar with my pint and leaned over, studying my face. “Ye look a bit like that singer who disappeared off the face of the planet.”
I decided to head him off at the pass. “Skylar Finch, right?” I gave him what I hoped was a teasing smile along with a roll of my eyes.
“Ah, ye get that a lot, do ye?” He grinned flirtatiously.
“I do. All I need is the rainbow hair.”
His eyes took in my own now-short, light blonde hair. “Nah, yours is good. My opinion?” He leaned closer, blue eyes dancing. “Ye’er way hotter than Skylar Finch.”
I wanted to burst out laughing but instead gave him a pleased smile. “I’ve heard that too.”
He chuckled and straightened up, so I handed him money for my drink. He took it but brushed his fingers over mine. “Do ye have tae go back up or can ye stay and talk tae me a while?”
Deciding he was a much safer option than Killian, I agreed to stay. I let him flirt with me while I drank my lager, feeling loose and a bit tipsy. He asked me questions I couldn’t answer without giving away the truth, so I danced around them coyly, which in retrospect came off a lot like flirting.
And that’s how Killian found me.
I didn’t hear him come into the bar because of the music and I was laughing at something the bartender said. But I felt him as soon as he got within two yards.
Killian’s hard gaze flicked between me and the bartender as he strode over to us and put his empty pint glass on the bar top with a calmness I saw through. He stared at me with a mix of annoyance, want, and incredulity.
I didn’t know how to untangle myself from his eyes.
I never could.
Especially when they smoldered.
I’d hung out at parties with Hollywood actors and charismatic rockers but I’d never met a man who actually smoldered until Killian O’Dea.
“We need to leave.” He sounded so cold, so completely at odds with his expression.
And I knew he was right. Whatever Autumn was trying to do here had worked, and it was dangerous. I nodded and pushed my nearly empty glass away. I said goodbye to the bartender who didn’t hide his disappointment that I was leaving.
Killian rounded the bar, placed a possessive hand on my lower back, and gently pushed me forward.
“Put your blazer on,” he commanded as he held the door open for me.
“I’m not cold.” And I wasn’t. I was burning hot. Part alcohol, part utter sexual frustration.
“You might not feel it but it’s cold.”
We hurried up the steps and I saw the light of an available taxi in the distance. Rather than put on my blazer, I prioritized getting home and away from Killian O’Dea and threw out my hand.
“I’ll be fine,” I said, releasing a long breath of relief as the taxi indicated it was pulling over for me. I gave Killian a quick look that didn’t land on any particular part of him. “Thanks for tonight.” I marched over to the taxi and pulled the door open. I’d put my foot in to slide inside and was pulling the door closed when I felt resistance.
Killian.
He nodded to me. “Get in.”
Confused, I let go of the door and slid along the back seat, watching as he got in beside me and slammed the cab door. He rattled off my address to the driver and stared stonily ahead.
“What are you doing?” I whispered.
“Making sure you get home all right.”
I didn’t reply.
I stared out the window at the passing lights of the city in the dark and tried not to think about the man beside me. But the more I tried not to think about him, the more I thought about him.
I’d never experienced this kind of heightened attraction before. I knew it existed between me and Killian. It was there during the songwriting and it was definitely there in his office that day. However, we’d both had tight control over it.
But now it was like I’d lost hold of the reins and whatever I was feeling was so big, it was spilling out all over Killian. Or maybe it was the opposite. Maybe it was him who had lost control and was making me careen all over the place. And now it was like he could sense my body’s reaction, sense that my breasts felt tight and swollen, that my nipples were two stiff peaks against my bra, and there was a ready, hot slickness between my legs.
I’d never wanted anyone the way I wanted Killian right then. Not even Micah.
The longing was so sharp, it brought tears of frustration to my eyes.
I blinked them away, grateful to see the streetlights reflecting off the dark waters of the Clyde and the sight of my building a short distance away.
“I’ll pay,” Killian muttered.
Even if I paid, he was still paying because the money I had was from the borrowed allowance he provided me.
Shouldn’t that be a cold reminder of what he is to you, Skylar?
But it wasn’t.
Shit.
As soon as the cab pulled up to my building, I muttered a thanks to the driver and a goodbye to Killian. I slammed the door behind me and got out, shock freezing me on the sidewalk as I watched Killian emerge from the cab too.
The driver pulled off, leaving us staring at each other on the street.
Fierce need burned in Killian’s eyes.
Almost pleading.
Longing.
Mirrored desperate want.
I guessed we were both done fighting this, then.
A deep thrill moved through my lower belly and that slick heat got a whole lot slicker and hotter between my legs.
We fell into step beside each other and I unlocked the main door with shaking hands. He held it open for me and I moved past him, my breasts brushing against his chest. His breathing faltered, as did my own. When we stepped into the elevator, the oxygen seemed to thin. All you could hear was our shallow breaths.
My fingers itched to reach for him, but I held onto some restraint, even though the urge to rip off his shirt was extremely powerful.
I trembled so hard to get the key in the apartment door that Killian covered my hands with his and helped me. For a moment we stood there, his hand wrapped around mine, the heat of his body at my back. I wanted to ask what the hell we were doing, thinking, but I was afraid it would shatter this. That it would make us overthink ourselves out of it.
And I didn’t want to think.
I wanted to feel.
I pushed the door open and strode into the apartment, dropping my purse and key on the side table as I passed it, listening as he closed and locked the door behind us and followed me into the sitting room. Standing with my back to him, feeling him everywhere as if he were wrapped around me, even though he was on the other side of the room, I gazed out at the dark river.
As soon as I turned around, everything would change.