“So he would live with us?” Davey asked, bouncing the ball again.
“Yes.”
“Every day?”
“Yep.”
“Where would he sleep?” Another bounce for Chico.
“With me. In my room.”
“So gross,” Davey said, and Jess laughed shakily. Her brother looked at her a minute, those long, heartbreaking lashes.
“Do you remember when I had my appendix taken out?” she asked.
“Yes. You were sick in the hospital, and Gerard stayed with me.”
“That’s right. And after that, I had to think about who would take care of you if I couldn’t. You know, if I got sick again.”
“Or if you died,” he supplied.
“Right.” Always blunt, her Davey. “I picked Connor.”
Davey looked at her. “Why?”
“I knew he’d do a good job. Even though back then, you didn’t like him, and you were scared of him, I knew he’d take good care of you.”
“How’d you know that?”
She surreptitiously wiped her eyes. “Because he’s always taken such good care of me.” She swallowed. “So what do you think? Can I marry him?”
If he said no, that would be that. She’d have to deal with no, because Davey had to come first. She owed him that, and more important, she wanted that. So if he said—
“Okay,” he said, then rubbed his nose with the back of his hand.
“Really?” Her heart leaped, and she sucked in a fast breath.
“Sure. I guess. Want a turn?” He handed her the tennis ball, and she threw it, Chico streaking after it.
She took Davey’s hand, which was sticky with drying dog drool. “I’ll still love you best,” she whispered.
It was true. Since the day she’d first seen her brother’s tiny, squalling face, her life had been defined. Everything had changed that day, when Jessica Dunn became a big sister. She grew up. She took care of someone. She was a hard worker and protective and focused because Davey needed her to be.
Everything good about her was born the day he was.
And even though she wanted to marry Connor so, so much, her heart was breaking a little. It had always been just the two of them. Her and Davey, all these years, from the trailer park to the rental house to finally making it here to their little house in the Village. The two of them together...that had always worked. Even when it was hard.
Three...three was a giant unknown.
Or maybe it was just faith in the future. Maybe she was just planting her roots.
“I love Chico best,” Davey said. “And you. And Dad, and Miranda. And Ned, but I don’t love Ned as much as I love Chico.”
“So maybe we could go to O’Rourke’s. What do you say?”
“Okay! Can I have nachos?”
“You sure can.” She hugged him hard and kissed his cheek.
“Stop it,” he said.
She kissed him again anyway, and again and again, until he wriggled away, laughing and wiping his face.
* * *
WHEN SHE GOT to O’Rourke’s an hour later, her father and brother right behind her, Jessica was shaking. Hard. Visibly. It seemed like her legs might give out with every step. Her heart was racing so fast it was quite possible she was going to faint.
Her father put his hand on her shoulder.
Colleen was there with Lucas and the baby, Levi and Faith and little Noah at the same table. Colleen gave her a smile and a thumbs-up.Honor and Tom and Charlie were at another table, along with Mr. Holland and Mrs. Johnson, and Marian Field, the mayor of Manningsport. Pru and Carl were at the bar with Jack and Emmaline.
Pru came over, smiling. “Maid of honor, you hear? Don’t you dare pick my prettier sisters. Come on, Davey, sit with us. You, too, Keith.”
“Will you be okay, Dad?” Jess asked. “Being at the bar?”
“I’m fine, sweetie.” He smiled and followed Pru.
Gerard, Ned, Lorelei, Connor’s parents and their spouses and awesome little Savannah...the whole frigging town was here.
The shaking got worse. Hopefully, she wouldn’t throw up.
She went into the kitchen. Connor was at the stove, Hannah was scraping a plate, one of the busboys was washing a big pot, and Rafe was whipping something with a whisk. “Hello, beautiful Jessica,” he said.
Connor glanced up, then did a double take. “Hey.”
“Hi,” she said, her voice cracking. The kitchen was too small. Too crowded. Fainting was a definite possibility. Was there enough air in here? “Hey. Uh...can you come out here for a second?”
Rafe slid into his spot at the stove. “I got this, boss.”
Connor wiped his hands and held the kitchen door for her. She went out and stopped in the little oasis between restaurant and kitchen, and stood just in front of the door, right where orders were passed from the kitchen. Ask him in front of everyone, Pru had advised. Show him you mean business.
She swallowed, her throat so dry it clicked.
Connor frowned. “What’s the matter, Jess? Is Davey okay?”
“He’s right over there,” she whispered. “At the bar. He’s fine.”
“What can I do for you?” he asked. He glanced at the crowded restaurant, then back at her.
This was the moment. She twisted her ring. “Um, Connor... I was wondering if you’d...uh...marry me.”
Though they were not very gracefully said, she saw the words hit him.
He didn’t move. His expression didn’t change. He didn’t even blink.
It seemed to get very quiet.
“When?” he asked. “In another decade or so?”
“I was thinking tonight. Now. Now-ish.”
His eyebrows raised. “Really.”
“Yep.”
“And why do you want to marry me, Jess?”
“Because...because...”
She looked into his eyes, and suddenly, the shaking was gone. “Because I’ve loved you since I was twelve years old,” she said.
His mouth opened slightly, and those blue eyes softened.
“I love you more than I can say,” she said, and tears flooded her eyes. God, she hadn’t cried as much in her entire life combined as she had in the past three months. “I’ve wasted enough of my life not being married to you, so I’d like to fix that. Right now. Marian brought the marriage license from town hall, and Mr. Holland will do the ceremony, and...and we could be husband and wife in about ten minutes, if you want.”
He was still just looking at her.
No doubt about it. The bar was silent.
Then he smiled. “Okay,” he said, and he kissed her, and her whole being seemed to fill up with light and happiness, even if she was crying. A roar went up from the restaurant, but she barely noticed.
“Thank you,” she whispered against his mouth. “Thank you for putting up with me.”
He kissed her again, then rested his forehead against hers. “You know how it is, Jess,” he said, smiling. “Anything for you.”
EPILOGUE
Eleven months, one week and two days after the woman once known as Jessica Does became Jessica O’Rourke...
CONNOR O’ROURKE REALLY liked being married.
In the spring following their impromptu wedding, Jess, Davey and he had moved to Connor’s bigger place on the other side of the green. Jess didn’t want to add too much to Davey’s list of life changes, so they lived on Putney Street through the fall and winter. And when Jess did sell the Victorian—at a tidy little profit, no less—she insisted on buying half of his house from him. It was the principle, she said.