“Justin—” I start. But he’s not going to let me finish.
“Lindsay texted me to say you weren’t feeling well. So I was going to see if you were okay. Well, I guess you’re real okay. Don’t let me interrupt.”
“Stop it,” I say.
“Stop what, you bitch?” he shoots back, coming close.
Like he smells it on me.
I watch as A tries to block him. “Justin,” he says.
Justin looks at him like he’s scum. “You’re not even allowed to speak, bro.”
I’m about to explain. But before I can do anything, Justin is punching A full force—a fist right in the face, knocking him down.
I scream and rush to help A. Justin tries to stop me, pulling my arm back.
“I always knew you were a slut,” he says.
I try to shake out of his grip, yelling, “Stop it!”
He lets go, but starts kicking A while he’s down. I scream some more. I don’t care who hears, if it will make Justin stop.
“This your new boyfriend?” Justin’s shouting. “You love him?”
“I don’t love him!” I shout back. “But I don’t love you, either.”
There.
Justin goes to kick A again, but this time A catches his leg and pulls him down. I try to reach A and get him back up, but I’m not quick enough, and Justin lands a kick right against his chin.
The door from outside opens, and the girls from softball start coming into the gym. They see me at A’s side. They see the blood on the floor. Both A and Justin are bleeding.
Immediately, there’s shock and gossip. Stephanie runs over and asks me if I’m okay. Justin stands up and tries to knock A down again. But he misses, and A gets up.
“What’s going on?” Stephanie’s asking. “Who is that?”
A stumbles over to me, and Stephanie tries to block him. I realize this makes sense. Justin is my boyfriend. A is an outsider. I could lie now. I could pretend I’m on Justin’s side. Only Justin would know the truth, and his pride might go along with the lie.
But I can’t. I can’t.
“I have to go,” A is telling me. “Meet me at the Starbucks where we first met. When you can.”
“A!” I call out. Because Justin is right behind him, is reaching for his shoulder. The hand lands, but instead of being pulled around, A frees himself and bolts.
There are tears in my eyes. I don’t know how I’m finding the strength to stand. Our gym teacher is coming over. Stephanie is steadying me.
“You fucking bitch!” Justin yells. Everyone hears him. “I am through with you. Do you understand? Totally through. So you can go fuck any guy you want. You won’t even have to do it behind my back. You think you’re so great, but you’re not. You’re not.”
I’m crying harder now.
“Justin, back off,” Stephanie says.
“Don’t try to defend her!” he yells at her. “She’s the one who did this!”
The teacher’s on us now, seeing my tears, seeing the blood. She has questions. Stephanie has questions. Lindsay, off to the side, gloats. A male teacher comes in and tries to take Justin to the nurse. Justin tells the teacher to fuck off, and pushes out of the gym. All eyes turn to me.
“It was nothing” is all I can manage to say.
Nobody believes me. And that makes sense, because nobody should.
Chapter Twenty-Five
I have to make some decisions, and fast. I have to figure out what my side of the story is so there can be a chance of people taking my side.
Even though I’m not hurt—at least, not physically—they take me to the nurse. She sees the state I’m in and makes me lie down. Stephanie asks permission to stay with me, but the nurse tells her to go to class. When the next class break comes, she returns with Rebecca and Preston, and I sit up in bed to see them.
“Rhiannon,” Rebecca says. “Tell us what’s going on.”
“I messed up,” I tell her, tell all of them. “It’s over with Justin. I met someone else.”
Rebecca tries to contain her surprise so I won’t see it. Preston, however, lets out a “Hooooooo-eeeee!” Stephanie slaps his shoulder, but it can’t be taken back.
“Who is it?” Preston asks. “Tell us tell us tell us.”
Rebecca and Stephanie may act like he’s out of bounds for asking so directly, but they’re both hanging on my answer, too.
“I can’t tell you,” I say. “It’s complicated.”
“Is he married?” Preston asks.
“No! It’s just…new.”
“New enough for him to break into school to see you?” Rebecca asks.
“Is that what people are saying?” I want to know and I don’t want to know.
“People are saying all kinds of things,” Stephanie reports. “Justin’s telling everyone he caught you going down on the guy. I’ve been telling everyone you were inside for maybe two minutes before we came in, and there was no evidence of him being, um, unzipped.”
“We hugged. That’s it.”
“Well, that’s enough,” Stephanie says. “I mean, for the gossip. As far as Justin is concerned, you are the biggest slut to ever hit this school. But he’s not exactly an unbiased witness.”
Now that the punching and the kicking are over, it’s really sinking in how much I’ve hurt him. What I did to him. What I did to us.
All that time. All those memories. I’ve burned it all down.
Rebecca leans in and hugs me tight.
“It’s going to be okay,” she tells me. “We’ll get through it.”
Preston and Stephanie echo this.
They might be all I have left.
The nurse lets me stay until the end of the day. When the final bell rings, I make a move to get out of the bed, but she gestures for me to hold off.
“Just let the halls clear,” she says. “Allow yourself that.”
She is so kind, I want to tell her everything. But I can only imagine what she’d think of me then.
I wait an extra hour. When I get to my locker, I find the photos of us that he kept in his locker and I kept in mine. He’s torn them all up, to the point that if I didn’t know what they’d once been, I’d never be able to guess.
That’s the only damage he’s done to my locker.