He did not know how great a sense of change she was experiencing;

she, who at home had sometimes wanted some favorite dish, or

sweets, without the possibility of getting either, now could

order what she liked, buy pounds of sweets, spend as much money

as she liked, and order any puddings she pleased.

She was dreaming with delight now of Dolly's coming to them with

her children, especially because she would order for the children

their favorite puddings and Dolly would appreciate all her new

housekeeping. She did not know herself why and wherefore, but

the arranging of her house had an irresistible attraction for

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her. Instinctively feeling the approach of spring, and knowing

that there would be days of rough weather too, she built her nest

as best she could, and was in haste at the same time to build it

and to learn how to do it.

This care for domestic details in Kitty, so opposed to Levin's

ideal of exalted happiness, was at first one of the

disappointments; and this sweet care of her household, the aim of

which he did not understand, but could not help loving, was one

of the new happy surprises.

Another disappointment and happy surprise came in their quarrels.

Levin could never have conceived that between him and his wife

any relations could arise other than tender, respectful and

loving, and all at once in the very early days they quarreled, so

that she said he did not care for her, that he cared for no one

but himself, burst into tears, and wrung her arms.

This first quarrel arose from Levin's having gone out to a new

farmhouse and having been away half an hour too long, because he

had tried to get home by a short cut and had lost his way. He

drove home thinking of nothing but her, of her love, of his own

happiness, and the nearer he drew to home, the warmer was his

tenderness for her. He ran into the room with the same feeling,

with an even stronger feeling than he had had when he reached the

Shtcherbatskys' house to make his offer. And suddenly he was met

by a lowering expression he had never seen in her. He would have

kissed her; she pushed him away.

"What is it?"

"You've been enjoying yourself," she began, trying to be calm and

spiteful. But as soon as she opened her mouth, a stream of

reproach, of senseless jealousy, of all that had been torturing

her during that half hour which she had spent sitting motionless

at the window, burst from her. It was only then, for the first

time, that he clearly understood what he had not understood when

he led her out of the church after the wedding. He felt now that

he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he

ended and she began. He felt this from the agonizing sensation

of division that he experienced at that instant. He was offended

for the first instant, but the very same second he felt that he

could not be offended by her, that she was himself. He felt for

the first moment as a man feels when, having suddenly received a

violent blow from behind, he turns round, angry and eager to

avenge himself, to look for his antagonist, and finds that it is

he himself who has accidentally struck himself, that there is no

one to be angry with, and that he must put up with and try to

soothe the pain.




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