His eyes widen, but I don’t give him the chance to say anything.
“Goodbye, Axel.”
I step inside and slam the door, not waiting around to see if he has anything to say.
I hear his bike start up a minute later, and then it disappears down the road.
And my heart breaks just a little more.
CHAPTER 15
MEADOW
Take me, my sweet, let our two hearts meet.
“Are you hungry, sweetheart?” Lady says as I walk back into the house.
I look up at her, barely registering what she’s saying. All I can think about is Axel. My heart aches, and I hate that I’ve let him get in so deep. When did I lose what I was fighting for? Lady Matilda walks over, placing a hand on my shoulder. Even with all her strange make-up, and her more-than-interesting look, she’s gentle, and I need gentle right now.
“I don’t know how I ended up here,” I say in a small, timid voice.
“Sometimes we end up where we’re meant to.”
I shake my head, and let her lead me into the living area. I sit on one of her odd colored couches, and she takes a seat across from me. “You know, Axel is a hard man, but he’s got something inside him that a lot of men don’t have. He’s got fierce loyalty to those he loves.”
“He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t even like me,” I say, staring down at my hands.
“But he does, love. He wouldn’t have ridden all the way out here to keep you safe, if he didn’t care what happened to you.”
I look up, and meet her eyes. “I appreciate what you’re doing here, Lady, I really do. But Axel and me...there’s nothing there.”
She smiles knowingly. “Love, don’t give up on those that are broken. Because when put back together, they can be the most faithful lovers, but more, they can be the best and loyal friends.”
I give her a weak smile. “So you’ve known Axel a while, then?”
She leans back against the chair, and her eyes soften again. “I have known him a solid five years. I have a soft spot for him. He’s like my own son.”
I feel my smile turn from weak to warm. She cares a lot about Axel, and I’m glad to know he has someone in his life who adores him the way she clearly does.
“So, you’re not hungry then?” she says, snapping out of her moment.
“No, thank you, though.”
“I imagine you just want to shower and rest?”
I nod, eagerly. “It’s been a long few weeks.”
“Of course. Come on up, I’ll show you to the guestroom.”
I follow her up a long, curved stairwell to a wide hall. We walk down, and stop at the second room on the right. She opens it, and I step in. It’s got pale green walls, and a bed in the middle that’s old and rustic, with dark green covers. There’s a cream rug on the wooden floor, and a small, light pine desk in the corner on the left.
“It’s very nice,” I say gratefully.
“Make yourself at home. Anything you need, just help yourself. There’s food downstairs, and I’m usually always around. The shower is down the hall to the left. I’ve put fresh towels in the cupboard for you. There’s plenty of shampoo and soaps, so please use them.”
I smile gratefully. “Thank you, Lady. I mean it.”
She walks over, pulling me in for a hug. It’s in that moment, that I’m reminded that she...is actually a he. But, that doesn’t matter, the comfort she’s giving me warms my heart. She is all woman, there’s nothing masculine about her, and that gives me a sense of comfort. She pulls back, and smiles warmly down at me. “Get some rest. Goodnight, sugar.”
“Goodnight, Lady.”
~*~*~*~
AXEL
“Another,” I growl to the bartender, and he slides me another shot.
I throw it back, slamming the shot glass down.
“Another.”
“You sure, boss?” he asks, hesitantly pouring.
“You own this joint?” I hiss.
“No, boss.”
“Then shut the fuck up.”
He slides the drink over, and I shoot it back. The burn eases the aching in my chest. I hate that it aches—I fuckin’ hate that she’s gotten to me. The way she looked at me when I left, I felt like a dog. A fuckin’ no good piece-of-shit.
“How’s it going, Axel?”
I hear Miranda’s voice, and I lift my head and turn to see her slide onto the stool beside me.
“How does it look like it’s goin’?”
“Bad day, then?” she mumbles.
“Somethin’ like that.”
She’s silent a moment, and then she says, “Why don’t you go back for her, if you’re so hung up over it?”
I turn, and shoot daggers at her. “What did you say?”
She narrows her eyes, and her expression hardens. “Don’t pretend with me, Axel. I’ve been around you long enough to know what sort of shit goes down in your head. You want her, you’re just too fucking stupid to admit it. Quit being so pigheaded, and go back for her. I know she’s waiting for you.”
“You don’t know shit,” I growl, skidding the stool back. “And don’t speak to me like that in my club again, or I’ll toss you out on your ass.”
I spin, and walk out of the room. I can’t deal with these children tonight. I can’t think of anything but her.
I start walking outside, and the minute the cool night air hits my face I breathe it in, and then ruin that by lighting a cigarette. My head is spinning, and I can feel my keys jingling in my pockets. I begin walking toward my bike, knowing what I’m going to do even before it fully registers.