And then what, he wanted to ask, but didn’t.
Because there would be no “then what?” Riley was looking for closure, and nothing more. He owed her that much.
“What do you want to know?”
“Tell me about your life with Amanda.”
He shrugged. “Not much to tell. We got married. Struggled at first. We had to get jobs, work full time and I was trying to take classes, too. Then it was hard after she miscarried. There was a lot of mistrust. I didn’t believe she was pregnant in the first place and she knew it, but once she showed me proof of her pregnancy I was committed, so we worked at the marriage, day by day.”
“Did you believe the baby was yours?”
“No. I asked her for a DNA test. We were going to do the test but she had to be farther along. Then she miscarried before we could make it happen. So I’ll never know if the baby was mine or not. If there was a baby.”
“That must have been difficult for both of you. Hard to have a relationship without trust.”
“It is. But eventually she mellowed, wasn’t as high strung as she’d been when you knew her.”
Riley nodded. “A lot of that came from her parents pushing her so hard. They wanted everything for her.”
He smiled. “That didn’t stop. They were so pissed about the whole pregnancy and marriage thing, accused me of seducing her and trapping her here. They hated me.”
Riley stepped off the ice and Ethan followed. They took off their skates and turned them in. “Let’s order a pizza and head back to the B and B to continue this talk. Unless you have to be somewhere else? Do you have to pick up Zoey?”
“No. She’s fine at my mom’s. I’ll just call her and have her keep Zoey for the night.”
“Okay.”
Once they got the pizza, they went to the bed and breakfast. Since Riley had rented the place out and all her people had left, she was alone.
“Aren’t Bill and Macy here?”
“No. They’re vacationing for the holidays in Colorado with their kids. We took over the whole house from them.”
“So you’re entirely alone in this big place?”
She grinned and grabbed plates from the kitchen cabinet, then laid out slices of pizza. “All by myself. You have no idea how awesome that is. I’m never alone.”
“Huh. Never thought about that. You probably have people around you all the time.”
She dug into a slice and moaned. “You have no idea. Oh, this is good.”
“Catarina’s is a new place. Opened up about a year ago. Cat’s family is from Italy and let me tell you, every pizza they make is amazing.”
Riley looked as if she’d died and gone to heaven. She dug into the pizza as if she hadn’t eaten in a week. They each had a beer and didn’t talk much while they enjoyed their food.
“Okay,” she said as she wiped her mouth with a napkin. “So Amanda’s parents hated you because they thought you trapped their daughter into marriage.”
He took a long pull off the bottle of beer, then set it down. “Yeah. Amanda tried to tell them it wasn’t my fault, but you know how they were.”
“Yeah, I know. They weren’t fond of me, either. Thought I wasn’t the right kind of friend for their daughter.”
“They always thought they were more upper crust than they actually were. I mean this is Deer Lake, not Boston or New York. And yeah, her father came from money, but he was no industry giant, either.”
She shrugged. “Amanda was never influenced by it. A little spoiled, but she and I had always been great friends. I still can’t believe she was jealous of me.”
“She was. She had a great voice, but it could never match yours. She was envious. And when you went off and became famous, she was so jealous. She wanted your life in a way that I don’t think she ever got over.”
Riley pushed her beer aside then lifted her gaze to his. “But she had you. So which one of us was the real winner?”
Ethan stared at her. He had no words, no answer, for what she’d just said. “Riley.”
What he saw in her eyes was truth. And forgiveness, which was what he needed more than anything, but didn’t deserve.
He reached out and took her hand, swirling his thumb over the softness of her skin. In his line of work he dealt with steel and wood and only the roughest raw materials. But the raw material that was Riley was nothing short of perfection. She was silk and gloss, her skin a creamy glow. Not even the harsh fluorescent lights of the kitchen could spoil her beauty, the way her eyes caught and reflected so much of who she was. He saw such innocence there, and such strength. She’d been through so much, had forged her destiny on her own with no one backing her or pushing her to succeed.
Satin over steel.
“Ethan,” she whispered, and he saw need and desire, no longer the girl she once was, but a woman.
A woman he wanted.
He stood, pulling her into his arms, his mouth covering hers, drawing in her gasp, then her moan.
All he’d been thinking about since that night in the car was kissing her again, touching her again, feeling her body pressed against his. She slid her hands in his hair and tugged, igniting his passion like dry timber catching fire.
All the careful consideration he’d given about keeping his distance went up in a puff of smoke as soon as their lips met. They crashed together, her hands went under his shirt and the logical part of his mind went blank. All thought fled south and the thinking part of his brain settled firmly in his pants.
He wanted Riley. Hell, he’d always wanted her.
And now he was going to have her. They had the house to themselves, the night to themselves, and nothing was going to stop this now.
***
A bombardment of sensations made Riley’s breath catch. Ethan’s scent—fresh soap mingled with the crisp outdoors, the satiny steel of his chest as she held onto him for support, his groan as he kissed her. She buried her face in his chest as he pushed her up against the kitchen wall.
Oh, my. This was hard passion, a need that had gone too long without being met. Their mouths and tongues tangled while they fumbled with clothing. Boots were kicked off in a hurry and she grabbed for the button of his jeans while he reached for hers, the only sounds in the quiet house their own harsh breaths as they fought to get each other undressed.
Ethan fumbled for the buttons on her flannel shirt, then ripped them, the sound of buttons flying across the wood floor only adding fuel to her steadily rising fire. She raised his shirt over his head, taking a few seconds to marvel at the sculpted abs, the wide expanse of his shoulders and chest. That’s all he’d give her before he kissed her again, hard, shoving her back against the wall and lifting her legs. She wrapped them around him, hard meeting soft.
He ripped her panties and she delighted in the feral hunger he had for her. She tangled her fingers in his hair and tugged as he entered her, making her cry out with the sheer delight of feeling him inside her. This was what she’d wanted her whole life, what she’d needed. This connection, this fire.
Ethan.
She came almost immediately, and rode the wave while he pushed her to the edge again and again, his mouth on her lips, her throat, his tongue blazing a trail of hot sensation she could barely endure but never wanted to end. And when she climbed to the edge and fell over again, he fell with her, this time his mouth taking hers in a searing kiss that left them both shaky and breathless.
And still, he held her, the corded muscles of his arms able to take her weight as he balanced her against the wall.
When she could find her voice again, all she could manage was, “Wow.”
“Sorry. Not a finessed moment.”
She swept his hair off his brow. “It was a wow moment. It was perfect.”
He grinned, kissed her and set her down. Riley fixed them something to drink, then they gathered their clothes and went upstairs to the bedroom.
Ethan seemed comfortable wandering the house na**d. Then again, why not? It was just the two of them and oh, man, he was magnificent. She could tell he worked his body hard, and he had the best ass she’d ever seen.
Riley remembered their makeout sessions used to be all hands and mouths and couldn’t get enough of each other, but they’d never made love. Maybe that’s what had hurt so much about finding him in Amanda’s bed that morning. Amanda had had him, and she hadn’t.
She forced thoughts of Amanda out of her head, refusing to let the past intrude on the present. She couldn’t go back and change what was. Now was what she was interested in, and right now Ethan was hers.
Only hers.
They climbed onto the bed together and Ethan dragged her against him.
“Let’s try to slow things down this time,” he said.
“I thought last time was pretty good.”
“It was, but I want to touch all of you this time, linger over you.”
She shuddered out a sigh when he brushed his lips across hers, then drew her in for a hungry kiss that melted her to the sheets.
As he slid his fingers up her ribcage, she was afraid she was going to slide right off the bed from the sheer pleasure of it. He pulled his lips away and she felt consumed by the raw hunger in his eyes, the need she saw reflected there.
She’d missed so much with Ethan, had hesitated all those years ago and she’d lost him. And she might not really have him now, but she was going to have him tonight, even if she didn’t tomorrow. She wanted this one night with him no matter what happened after that.
And now it was her chance to explore, too, to lay her palms over his chest and let them wander over the rock-hard steel of his abdomen. The solid, muscular feel of him was so different than when he’d been a boy. This was a man’s body, the sculpted angles and planes telling her what he did for a living.
And below his belly, she wound her fingers around him, rewarded with a slow hiss of his breath.
This was a new side to their relationship, the adult side, something they’d never had before. When she was younger she’d been tentative, innocent, not knowing what to ask for.
Now she knew exactly what she wanted.
All of him.
He rolled her onto her back and climbed on top of her, kissing the spot between her neck and shoulder that drove her crazy, before lazily mapping her body with his lips, from her collarbone to her breasts. And when he reached her br**sts he took his damn sweet time, torturing her with nips and kisses and bites that had her arching her back and crying out for more.
Bastard. She loved every second of what he did to her, was damp and ready for him again in seconds. She raised her arms out for him, but he only chuckled and laid them on the bed, holding them there while he kissed her ribs, her belly, working his way between her legs, nudging them apart with his shoulders, then putting his mouth on her sex to pleasure her until her mind no longer worked, until her back bowed and she muttered unintelligible words as she cried out with a shattering cl**ax that left her shaking all over.
And when his face came into view again, he gave her a satisfied smile, rolled her onto her side facing him and lifted her leg over his hip. He entered her and this time it was slow and achingly sweet—at least in the beginning.
She touched his face, her fingertips tracing his lips as he stroked her so gently it almost moved her to tears. Having Ethan inside her, being one with him, was what she’d always wanted. They were meant to be together like this.
Passion rose in a hurry, and soon she was scraping her nails down his arm, and he gripped her h*ps and drew her hard against his thrusts. It seemed there could be no light and easy between them, because they had held off for too long, and the desire they felt had to be satisfied in the most primal of ways.
She demanded, and he gave, and when they both shattered, it was wrapped around each other, bodies, mouths and souls.
They played all night long, stopping only to eat a snack in the pre dawn hours.
They went to sleep tangled together like two people who’d been apart for so long they never wanted to lose sight of each other.
Riley wondered briefly what the next day would bring, then decided she just didn’t care, because they’d had tonight, and that’s all that mattered.
Chapter Eight
Ethan spent Christmas Eve morning at the office, something that didn’t make his mother too happy.
But he needed to get a few loose ends tied up, plus he just wanted some time alone with his thoughts since for some reason his mother had let everyone know he’d spent the night with Riley. Which meant nudges and winks from Brody and smiles from his Dad. Wyatt just shook his head and called him a dumbass.
He didn’t want any of it, just some peace and quiet to think about what it all meant.
After a couple hours of mulling it over, he realized it meant nothing. Because after Christmas Riley would be going back to Nashville, where she had a life and a blockbuster career. He’d be staying in Deer Lake where he had a job, a family and a daughter to raise.
The fact he was still in love with her didn’t enter the picture of her world at all, nor should it.
He knew he should have kept his distance. In fact, it would have been better if he hadn’t seen her at all. Then all the old feelings he’d had for her wouldn’t have come rushing back.
It was payback for hurting her. Because when she left, it was going to hurt like hell and it was going to be just like ten years ago all over again. The heartbreak he’d experienced when he’d gone out searching and couldn’t find her, couldn’t explain to her what had happened. The loss, the anguish, the wish that he could find her and bring her back home.
But this wasn’t her home anymore and never would be again.
What would she do in a tiny town like Deer Lake? What did Ethan have to offer her now that she was rich and famous? She already had everything.