I could, too. Happily, even. That’s something we have in common, Jax.
“People have,” she murmured. “People do.”
The silent accord between us felt perfect; I ached with the beauty of flying. And I thought the Rodeisian female felt it, too— that quiet shiver of light refracted from the sensor screens, interpreted by my nervous system as pure pleasure. I’d never known anything like it. The ship felt natural in my hands, an appendage I should have been born with.
“Ready for jump?” I asked eventually.
Her reply sounded suggestive, somehow. “Since the moment you came aboard.”
[Narration pauses, time lapse of six hours and twelve minutes]
When we jacked in, the wetware amplified my power, laying the navigator open. I could sift through her memories as if they were jewels in a treasure box. She knew—and she didn’t seem to mind. More startling, the female wanted me. She liked my anger and brutality, the scent of blood that lingered about me.
Well, if she wanted rage and savagery, she came to the right man. That much, I could offer. It was, in fact, all I had left. That was the first time I became part of a woman, Jax. There in the cockpit, and I think it prepared me for you.
The ship shivered as the phase drive hummed. I knew how it worked, opening a small wormhole through which we would access grimspace. I’d seen the charts and numbers. And even so, I wasn’t remotely prepared for that first jump.
I flew with her, became part of her. But our link exposed me, too, showing more than I ever wanted anyone to see. I sensed no judgment in her, but it was enough that she’d seen the darkness roiling. Nausea rose in my throat even as my hands responded to her silent directives.
“Here,” she said. “Jump here.”
And I had to trust her. I hit the panel, signaling the ship we were ready to return to straight space. Shaky and queasy from the aftereffects, it took me three tries to unplug. By that time, the Rodeisian was already out of her seat.
I glanced at the star charts, trying to place where we’d come out. Jumps had to take place well away from planetary pull, so sometimes it was a matter of hours before reaching the final destination. But what I saw on the screen didn’t match.
“This isn’t the way to Gehenna.”
“It isn’t,” she agreed. Her huge fist slammed into my temple before I could brace for impact.
The lights went out.
[Narration pauses, time lapse of five hours and twenty-nine minutes]
Distant voices reached me before my brain came fully back online. My head throbbed with a low, dull pain, reminding me of the score I had to settle. Right then, I made up my mind—I’d kill that treacherous jumper if it was the last thing I did.
I should have known her sexual impulses didn’t necessarily predicate her true thoughts. Should have realized she had been too helpful, agreed too easily. Desperation made me stupid, careless, and now I’d pay the price. If they knew how much people on Nicuan would pay to get me just like this . . . Mary, it didn’t bear thinking about.
I always thought I would die on my feet. I lay with my eyes closed, trying to make sense of what I was hearing, but my heart thudded in my ears, making that difficult.
Two females, nearby. I couldn’t pick anything up from them, so either they’d sedated me, or a Rodeisian fist worked wonders at shutting down my ability.
“What in Mary’s name have you done, Tanze?” A woman with a low, rasping voice sounded exasperated. “I wanted Hon, along with his ship. Half those diggers he delivered for the mine don’t work!”
I opened my eyes a slit, risking a look to assess how much trouble I was in. They’d bound my hands and feet, with a filament that would slice my skin if I struggled. They weren’t screwing around, then.
Two females, one human, and one Rodeisian, the same one who tricked me, then knocked me out. Rage almost overwhelmed me, but it wouldn’t do any good to struggle when they had me tied. No, I had to figure out what was going on here—and what they intended to do with me. Maybe I could play along, offer whatever they wanted. They probably wouldn’t be fool enough to trust me, though.
Tanze didn’t appear overly concerned. “Plans change. This guy came on board instead of Hon, and I figured you’d take what you could get. We can keep the ship in recompense for the busted units. You don’t need trouble with offworlders, Mair. Bringing Hon to Lachion would complicate the whole plan.”
What plan? Where was Lachion anyway? I fumbled through my galactic geography and came up blank. It couldn’t be an important tier world; I’d killed on most of those. That would limit my escape options.
But Mair must be the old woman. I stole another glance. She was small, but wiry, still strong-looking despite her age. I didn’t make the mistake of counting her out. Her white hair stood up around her face like a cloudy nimbus, as if she hadn’t combed it in weeks, and she’d caked altogether too many cosmetics on her wrinkled face.
“That’s true enough,” she agreed with a sigh.
“And this one needs you,” Tanze went on. “He’ll die if you don’t help him. I don’t know how he’s made it this long without going mad or being scooped up by the Corp, but he’s on the brink, now.”
Every muscle stiffened. What the frag’s the Rodeisian on about? Does she know? How could she? Being discovered was my worst nightmare, and here I lay tied, listening to it happen. It was bad enough when I thought they just might sell me back to the Nicuan nobles, but if Farwan found out that I made it through adolescence without being chipped, it would be exponentially worse. I knew all about what they did to people who violated their rules. After all, they did it to my father first, leaving me with a stepmother who hated me, and a half sister who needed me to provide for her.
Crazed with the voices in my head, I started fighting in the streets, and unscrupulous people noticed my way with knives. They hired me to do what they didn’t want to, Jax. Quiet jobs, dirty ones. I didn’t care as long as it paid. And that’s how I got started as a merc.