“No, Roni was. She still insists that Nellie’s gonna get hurt.”

Abel frowned, deciding to keep to himself who his date had actually been with that night. Noah would find out soon enough. Abel would spare himself Noah’s shrewd expression. “Well, if it pisses her off so much, why did you tell her?”

“Because I want her to get used to it, that’s why,” Noah said, looking at Abel over the roof of his car. Abel unlocked his door and got in, leaning over to unlock Noah’s door. As soon as Noah got in, he continued. “Roni tends to romanticize everything, and even with Nellie telling her she’s good with this being a purely physical thing, that she’s in no way looking for any kind of relationship, Roni’s still worried. Hell, Nellie even assured her again just the other day that she’s all about having fun and being a free spirit now with no one to answer to, but Roni still keeps insisting one of you is bound to want more eventually and that you two might sour up things for our little group. So I need to keep reminding her that it’s not happening.”

Abel didn’t think it possible to feel anymore aggravated than he already did. All about being a free spirit? Maybe she would be jumping in bed with this guy Friday night. Maybe that was who she really wanted to be now, and what he thought he saw in her eyes, felt in her kisses, despite her saying flat out that serious relationships weren’t on her to-do list, was just him being delusional. Maybe he shouldn’t give a shit about what she did when he wasn’t around, and he should just enjoy the incredible time he had with her. Evidently it was what she was doing.

Swallowing back the irrepressible jealousy, he revved the ignition to a loud start. He now attributed what he was feeling to his overinflated ego. He’d been so sure the extra effort he made to take care of her needs—needs he’d suspected and she’d confirmed had been grossly neglected by her ex—would be enough to keep her from going out and having them be satisfied elsewhere. That and the fact that amidst the most grueling training he’d ever had he was likely in the best shape of his life. His body would probably never get any harder than it was now. He’d been sure she’d be highly appreciative of that and that it would go a long way in keeping her from “letting loose.” He didn’t admit it then, but now he had no choice because he felt ready to detonate. Only now he welcomed it. Anger was good. As long as it was ego-crushing fury, he could deal with this. Pain was completely different. He had no time to deal with that in his life right now.

“Yeah, well you can keep reminding Roni of that because I’m only in this for one thing. Nellie’s free spirit,” he said the venom in his words maybe a little too thick, “takes care of what I need without me having to deal with the usual drama of someone demanding more.”

The irritation only mounted now because, even as he stared ahead, he could feel Noah’s eyes on him. He knew he should’ve kept his mouth shut. “Good,” Noah said as they pulled out of the parking lot. “I’m not gonna lie, man. I was pretty worried about this in the beginning, especially with you making her your own personal assistant. But seeing as how you two seem to have this thing under control, it makes me feel better. You know Roni had this crazy notion that maybe you’d be a little ticked about Nellie going out on a date.”

Clenching his jaw, Abel shrugged. “Not at all.” As they came to a stop, Abel could see from the corner of his eye that Noah was staring at him again. He refused to look his way because if he didn’t know better, Noah was already on to him.

“So did, uh, Nellie mention the date to you?”

“Nope,” Abel said, staring straight ahead, willing the light to turn green because he had a feeling where Noah might be going with this.

“Hmm, that’s kind of odd, no? I mean neither of you is demanding anything from the other, so why wouldn’t she mention it?”

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The light turned green, and Abel revved up his engine as he took off again. “She did mention the concert,” he said, turning on the radio. He was ending this right now. “Only she didn’t mention who she was going with and I didn’t ask.” He glanced at Noah for a second. “It’s none of my business.”

With that, he turned the volume up on the Sublime song on the radio. This conversation was over. It hit Abel now why he hadn’t wanted this thing with Nellie to be anything more than what it was from the very beginning. He didn’t have time for all the angst he’d felt in the last hour alone. Either he’d stick to what he’d agreed to—take the time he was spending with Nellie for what it was worth and leave any and all feelings out of it—or walk away now before he was in too deep. Only he knew now and he’d known it before he even asked Nellie to come with him to San Francisco that he was already in too deep. The trip had only solidified it. He’d been certain she was feeling the same thing too. But the fact remained she was going on a date—her first real date since her divorce—whatever the f**k that meant.

Chapter 8

Once again, Nellie gave herself the same speech. This was to be expected. It shouldn’t surprise her that it was Thursday and she still hadn’t seen nor heard from Abel since the night after they got back from their trip—almost a week ago. He was in training hell, and then he’d gone to New York for a few of those days. It was a trip she’d been invited to, only she didn’t realize that not going would mean not hearing from him either. Even a text or two letting her know he’d been thinking about her like she’d been thinking about him all this time would’ve been nice. But she knew this relationship was different than most. Just because it felt as if things had changed in San Francisco didn’t mean he’d suddenly start behaving like a real boyfriend who checked in on a daily basis.




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