It was no secret that Justin had a thing for me back in the day. Even if he hadn’t confessed his feelings for me that one night when we had too much to drink after a show, I had already known he wanted me. But before that night I’d just assumed his want for me was physical. I was shocked at his sweet words which told me his feelings were much more than physical. But a few days after Justin’s confession, Michael proposed and my relationship with Justin changed. He was still friendly, but he kept his distance and was respectful of my new status.

I had kept track of Double Strife over the years and watched as Justin transformed into the ultimate rock star. Every time I saw him in a magazine or on T.V., he had a different girl tucked under one tattooed arm, and a cigarette or guitar in the other. Women had always swooned over Justin and Kyle, but in the last few years Justin had emerged as the mega star as the band grew to iconic levels. I was sure it was because of his devastatingly handsome looks coupled with his cocky smile, ice blue eyes, and body covered in artistic ink. His look screamed bad boy and it seemed to make the women want him even more.

As I got ready for Sienna and I to meet the band for the first time in years, I was riddled with emotions: guilt because I hadn’t mentioned to Jack that Justin had a thing for me years ago, and excitement to see the guys again. I knew telling Jack would only upset him, and I really didn’t want to worry him when I was thousands of miles away, so I had decided not to mention the past to Jack. Besides, it was a long time ago and Justin and I had both moved on.

***

Sienna and I were at the bar, warming up with our usual tequila shot, when I felt a strong arm wrap around my waist from behind. I jumped from the touch and quickly swung my body around ready to assault the offender, only to find Justin smirking at me with a cocky dimpled smile.

“Still drinking tequila I see.”

“Justin! You scared the shit out of me. You almost got yourself smacked across the face.”

“Still feisty huh, blondie.” Justin arched an eyebrow, gracing me with the smile that made his fans drop their panties.

I smiled and shook my head at his playfulness, only then realizing that he was still holding me close against his body. And it didn’t look like he planned to let me out of his grip anytime soon.

I playfully smacked him and detangled myself from his arms, making my way to his brother to give him a hug as Sienna stepped in to greet Justin.

“Kyle, it’s great to see you,” I said with sincerity.

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“You too, Syd. We are stoked that the four of us are back together. It’s going to be like old times — minus the barroom brawls at three in the morning. Well, that’s if this ass**le behaves.” Kyle motioned to his brother. I had forgotten about how many fights Justin used to get into at the fleabag bars we played at years ago.

We all laughed and did a celebratory tequila shot together. Oddly, even though it had been years since we’d all seen each other, there was a warm familiarity to the four of us, as if we had picked up right where we left off.

***

It didn’t take long before word must have gotten out that Double Strife was at the bar, because the bar that had been almost empty when we walked in was suddenly filled with young women. Scantily clad young women in tight clothes, eagerly salivating in Justin and Kyle’s direction, looking like wolves about to pounce on their prey.

Sienna looked around and saw what I saw. “I see you boys don’t have to work too hard for it anymore, do you?” She smiled as she motioned for them to look around the room.

Kyle laughed. “I never thought I’d say this, but that shit gets old. The other night Justin had a woman rip open her shirt and display a full-face picture of him tattooed on her stomach. A few years back I wouldn’t have noticed the tat, since the woman had no bra on and a set of double-d’s, but instead of checking her out I found myself looking at the artwork and thinking I should get the artist’s number.” Kyle laughed and took a swig of his beer.

Sienna turned to Justin, intrigued. “What did you say to the woman with your face on her chest?”

Justin went to speak, but Kyle beat him to it. “Say? He took her in the back and f**ked her kneeling while she laid on the bed so he could look at himself while he gave it to her.”

Sienna and I cracked up at Kyle’s response. I had forgotten how much the two brothers constantly busted on each other. It was one of the things that made hanging out with the two of them so entertaining. One was always trying to embarrass the other or put the other down. But it was usually all in good fun.

I looked over at Justin and he was glaring at Kyle, obviously pissed at his brother for the story. It made me wonder whether the story was just Kyle teasing or if Justin really had slept with her.

After a minute of angry glaring at his brother, Justin chugged his beer and slammed down the bottle. “Come on, you f**ker, let’s go play a song so you shut the hell up.” Justin looked to me and Sienna, “You ladies remember the words to Gone?”

Sienna jumped up. “Of course. I masturbated to it last week.” Her eagerness and playfulness seemed to bring Justin out of his mood.

***

The hotel bar was more than happy to let us play two songs for the crowd. Although we hadn’t played anything together in years, even I had to admit we sounded good together. Justin and Kyle were more than happy to share the spotlight with Sienna and I, although I was pretty sure the mega-horde of women watching had no idea we were even in the room.

By the time we were done, the bar was getting out of control. Swooning women were beginning to push to try to get closer to Justin and Kyle. The bar manager was kind enough to see the panic in my face and offered us a back exit through the kitchen that led us to an empty stairwell.

We found our way downstairs and the four of us slipped outside and spent another hour lounging on chairs around the closed pool, talking about the tour. Even though we had only played two songs, we were all on a post-show high. Kyle told us about their mom coming to forty-two of their shows and we all laughed. I’d always thought it was sweet that Mrs. Smith had been the biggest supporter of her boys before they ever found success. When we were back in Boston, their mom could almost always be found during their show. She didn’t come early or linger after the show, but she was always there to support her boys.

Eventually the conversation found its way to me and I took a few playful jabs about my decision to teach, leaving playing music for a few years. They all enjoyed taking their turn poking fun at my temporary insanity, and then the topic of Michael made its way to the forefront.




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